


To Heal a Soul

by shanfawn16



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Bonding, Drama, M/M, Romance, Sexual Content, Slash sex, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-05-07
Updated: 2007-06-05
Packaged: 2018-10-01 01:45:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 47,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10177829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shanfawn16/pseuds/shanfawn16
Summary: Severus once again finds himself forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> Note from SeparatriX, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [HP Fandom](http://fanlore.org/wiki/HP_Fandom_\(archive\)), which was closed for health and financial reasons. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [HP Fandom collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/hpfandom/profile).

****

To Heal a Soul

**  
_Disclaimer:_  
** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoat Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

A/N: This is a WIP, but I’m fairly far along in it. Thanks to the wonderful redmeadow for her advice and encouragement. This is also my first attempt at Snarry… please be kind! Remember, reviews make for happy, dedicated, and motivated authors! So leave one today! 

**Chapter One**

Severus stalked back and forth in front of the Headmistress’ desk; irritation flowed off of him in waves and his voluminous robes billowed around his legs as he turned briskly, only to continue his circuit. After all of the trials and tribulations he had managed to somehow survive, there was very little that could still surprise him. Minerva had just managed to do so. It had been a year since he had set foot in Hogwarts and he had fervently hoped never to have to again. It was only the urgency expressed in Minerva’s summons which brought him back to this hated place.

“I cannot fathom how you could possibly believe this to be a wise decision,” he snarled, glaring icily at the woman. “It does not matter how sick the whelp is, he would never choose to place himself in a position where I have any sort of power over him.”

“You misunderstood me, Severus. I did not say that he requested your help,” the older witch replied, stoically sipping her Earl Gray as if she hadn’t just started making asinine solicitations. “I am the one asking for your assistance.”

“Regardless, even if I were to agree, which I most certainly am not, he would never accept it from me,” Severus replied, finally halting his pacing and bracing himself against her desk, meeting her fierce gaze with one of his own. “We may have put our differences aside to accomplish victory against the Dark Lord, but that in no way means that he would happily submit to this inane idea of yours.”

Minerva sighed heavily and, for a moment, she looked every day of her ninety years. “From what I understand, he may not have much choice. He is very ill. There is nothing more that the Healers at St. Mungo’s can do for him.”

“I still do not understand what illness has befallen him. He was cured and released nearly a year ago. What could possibly have happened in that time to warrant such extreme worry?”

“I think perhaps it would be best if you spoke to Harry personally about that,” she said, removing her glasses and rubbing her eyes wearily. “He is still living in his home at Godric’s Hollow, but soon he will be unable to manage on his own and will need almost constant caring. I am hoping to persuade him to come here.”

Severus sank into his chair, feeling exhausted and out of sorts. Although he still did not know the entire story, he got the impression that there were some rather dire circumstances surrounding the illustrious Mr. Potter, once again. Knowing that there was little he could do but try and help the insufferable brat, he closed his eyes and sighed in defeat.

“I imagine you would like to forewarn Mr. Potter of my visit,” Severus suggested before rising and leaving Minerva’s office. Her stiff nod and grievous expression followed him out the door.

Two days later, Severus found himself striding up the long front walk to the Potter home in Godric’s Hollow. Tucking away his irritation at having been talked into this meeting, he knocked on the front door and waited. When five full minutes had passed with no answer to his knocking, Severus decided to end his fool’s errand and turned to leave. Just as he stepped off the last stair, the door creaked open behind him.

“As always, you are adept at wasting my time, Mr. Potter,” he sneered, irate at both the boy and Minerva for urging him to do this. “I have plenty to occupy myself without having to take time out of my day to come and play nursemaid to you.” 

As he reached the top of the stairs and made to sweep his way into the house, he was finally able to get a good look at the young wizard. The sight drew him up short and stalled his breath.

The Savior of the Wizarding World, the young and handsome hero who had, at their last meeting, exuded life and health, was a mere shade of his former self. He appeared pale and shaky, weighing far less than he should; his skin was stretched obscenely thin against his bones. His eyes were tired and bruised-looking and his once full, shining, and famously unkempt head of hair was limp and thinned. If he hadn’t known at whom he was looking, Severus would never have guessed that the emaciated, sickly form in front of him was Harry Potter.

“I apologize for the wait, sir,” Harry said weakly. “It takes me a while to move about these days. Please, come in and make yourself comfortable.”

Severus was unable to tear his eyes away from him as he slowly led the way into a comfortable looking sitting room at the front of the house. Just the small exertion of walking the short distance had Harry wheezing. Severus wasn’t sure he had ever seen a sight as gruesome as the one in front of him. He watched as Harry slowly lowered himself onto the settee, closing his eyes and breathing heavily to try and regroup after the strain.

“Minerva said you’d be stopping by,” Harry said after an uncomfortable few moments. “I was surprised to hear of your concern.”

Severus maintained his unaffected demeanor, but found it difficult to do so. “It was not so much my concern as hers that has brought me here today,” he answered. “Now that I am here, however, I would appreciate it if you could enlighten me as to the circumstances behind your illness.”

Harry smiled wanly and snapped his fingers. A house-elf popped in and gazed sadly up at Harry. “Dobby, would you please bring us some refreshments? I think the Professor and I have a bit to talk about.” The house-elf popped out and returned quickly, carrying a tray laden down with tea and biscuits. 

“What, exactly, is it you would like to know, sir?” Harry asked once the tea had been poured.

“What is it that has made you so ill? Why is it that St. Mungo’s has been unable to help? What is it that Minerva thinks I could do to assist you?” 

“It’s basically an after-effect of a curse that I took during the Final Battle,” Harry explained, balancing his tea carefully in shaking hands. “It is similar to cancer, in that it has spread quickly and thoroughly throughout my body, attacking most of my internal organs and body systems. It was undetected for too long and there is now nothing that the Healers can do but make me as comfortable as possible. I do believe that Minerva was hoping that you would be available to provide me with the potions the Healers recommended, as it is common knowledge that you are far superior to any brewer the hospital would have on staff.”

Severus sat back in his chair, disbelief and horror warring for control of his emotions. “And you? What is it you hope?” he asked, disconcerted by the calm and detached way the young wizard had imparted the information.

“There is little reason to hope at this point, sir. I merely agreed to meet with you because Minerva requested that I do so. While I appreciate that you took time from your busy schedule to come here, I think we both know that you are also only here at her request. The potions I am taking are designed to ease my pain as I trudge slowly toward my death. It matters little to me who makes them.”

“I’ve never seen you give in to defeat before, Mr. Potter,” Severus said in a quiet voice.

“It’s not defeat, sir,” Harry said, meeting his eyes in a tired gaze. “It’s acceptance. If Dobby had not agreed to come and assist me, I would already be in the long-term ward at St. Mungo’s. At least this way, I can meet my end in my own home, with some privacy and at least a modicum of dignity.”

Anger flared in Severus’ gut at the injustice of the situation. Harry Potter may be an insufferable, irritating, impossible and insolent brat, but he did not deserve this. At that moment, the disdain he usually harbored for the young wizard did not matter to him. Despite his feelings, by the end of the war, Severus had seen many similarities between their situations and, at the time, it irked him immensely. But, regardless, they were both used as pawns in the war; both were asked to do the impossible; both were forced to set aside their own lives, their own wishes, their own hopes and dreams. While Harry had certainly garnered the accolades that came with the defeat of Voldemort, Severus knew that he hadn’t wanted them. 

In Harry’s short life, he had been forced to endure more hardship than most four times his age. They had formed a grudgingly civil working relationship to meet the needs of the times, and Severus learned quite a bit about him during that period. While he would never have admitted it, Harry Potter was actually an insightful, brave, and tiresomely noble individual. If events had been different, Severus thought that he would have enjoyed exploring the possibility of friendship. Seeing him, alone and forgotten, waiting for death, was more than he could bear.

“What of your friends, Mr. Potter? Where are they during this slow trudge toward your death?” he asked, wondering at the absence of the usual conglomeration of meddlesome irritants.

“My sickness makes them very uncomfortable, not that they would ever admit it,” he said, smiling grimly over his teacup. “About two months ago, I let them know that I was much too tired for personal visits. So, they faithfully firecall me once a week – every Wednesday evening at half-seven – to check up on me. I assure them that Dobby is taking wonderful care of me and that I am taking all of my required potions and I promise to send Dobby at once if anything should happen. Then they happily report back to anyone who feels the need to know and it is then safe for them to return to their lives and forget about me for the next six days.”

“I find it hard to believe that they have given up on you so easily,” Severus said, a slow anger building at the thought of his once-loyal companions abandoning him.

“Trust me, it wasn’t easy. However, I refuse to offer myself up for their deathwatch. Dobby will inform them after the fact, as I have instructed him. It is far better for them to get on with living rather than be hung up on my dying.”

Severus was unwittingly impressed by the strength of character that Harry was showing. He completely understood the desire to die on one’s own terms. He shuddered at the thought of having a group of people gathered around, hovering, waiting, watching for death to come. Without realizing it, Harry had just inadvertently convinced him to do whatever he could to ease his passage.

“Tell me about the potions you are taking,” he said, evidently taking Harry by surprise by the look on his face. “How many are you taking?”

“I’m taking eight potions, currently, on a regular basis,” he said, pausing to sip again at his tea. “Six of the potions are taken daily, one is taken bi-weekly, and one is taken weekly.”

Severus found himself surprised by the high number of potions and gestured for Harry to continue.

“I take a standard nutritive potion three times a day, since my digestive system can no longer handle anything other than soft, bland foods. Presently, I’m eating only porridge, scrambled eggs, and broth. Then there is the level four pain potion which I take every four hours to control the worst of the pain,” he said, and Severus barely contained his gasp at the high-level pain potion. The amount of pain Harry must be in was unthinkable to warrant such doses.

“Twice daily, I must take a potion designed to aid in elimination, as one of my kidneys has shut down and the other is failing. Every six hours I take a tonic, which helps to control the tremors I experience due to the damage to my nervous system. Every morning, I drink two potions which, when combined, help to maintain my blood pressure, which has become quite erratic.

“On Wednesdays and Saturdays, I take a specialized strengthening solution to help boost my failing immunity – can’t have a cold or virus come through to hurry me off, right?” he said with a snicker, causing Severus to smile despite the topic of conversation. 

“Finally, on Mondays I take a special infusion to help boost my iron levels, as I am quite anemic, as you can imagine,” he concluded. “Of course, there are other potions, which I have available when necessary – additional pain medication, anti-nausea potions, that sort of thing.”

Severus was stunned. Just the fact that Harry was still walking and talking after the numerous potions and ailments he mentioned was a minor miracle. 

“And you keep yourself on this hideously complex schedule of potions?” Severus asked.

“With Dobby’s help, yes,” he said, stifling a yawn against the back of his hand. “My primary Healer also comes weekly to bring me my potions and check on the progression.”

“When is your Healer scheduled to arrive this week?” Severus asked, already planning on being present to learn as much about this illness as possible.

Harry grinned weakly. “Well, since you’re so curious, you’re in luck. He’ll be here in half an hour.”

“Excellent,” Severus replied, sitting back and eating a biscuit. “I’m sure you won’t mind if I stay and question him as to your illness and prognosis.”

Harry snorted and managed a smile, making his features once again resemble the boy Severus had once known.

“Even if I did have a problem with it, it wouldn’t stop you,” Harry said.

Severus inclined his head in acknowledgment. “Would you mind?”

“No, of course not, sir.”

“And if I ask to see your medical file?”

“Again, I have no problem with it, but I would like to ask you why.”

“Why, Mr. Potter? I’m afraid you’ll have to be more specific,” Severus said, although he had an inkling as to what Harry was referring.

“Why take the time? Why bother? Why do you care?”

Severus placed his teacup down onto the table and leaned forward, capturing Harry’s gaze and holding it. “If I may, let me answer your question with one of my own. You spent quite a while tracking me down after Albus’ death. When you finally found me, why did you not curse me? Why not turn me over to the Aurors?”

Harry sighed heavily, his shoulders drooping as if burdened. “When Dumbledore’s will was read, I was given a letter he had left for me. In it, he explained the circumstances behind what had happened and that it had all been planned, to an extent. He asked that I keep an open-mind and not judge you harshly for your actions. He also asked me to look out for you – help you and protect you if necessary.”

Severus arched one eyebrow, waiting for Harry to put the pieces together.

Smiling, Harry said, “Am I to understand that I am not the only one to have received such a letter?”

“Ten points to Gryffindor, Mr. Potter,” Severus replied, allowing one corner of his mouth to turn upwards. “Not only did Albus ask me to look after you, but, as much as I am loath to admit it, I find that you are not so grating as you once were.”

“That is high praise, indeed, sir,” Harry said, looking serious once more. “I appreciate the gesture and give you free leave to examine any and all of my medical reports.”

“Very well,” Severus replied. “And one more thing, Mr. Potter. You have a house-elf. For the sake of your visitors, and yourself, please instruct him to answer the door from now on. Some of us are very busy, as you well know.”

“Understood, sir,” Harry said and chuckled lightly. Snapping his fingers, Dobby the house-elf appeared once again. “Dobby, my guest has asked that you be so kind as to answer the door from now on. Not that he would readily admit it, but I fear he is the slightest bit worried about my well-being.”

“Of course, Harry Potter, sir, Dobby will be answering the door from now on,” he said and disappeared with a crack.

At Harry’s smirk, Severus could do nothing but shake his head. “You will ruin my reputation, yet.”

“Ah, but what a lofty goal that would be in my final days,” Harry answered, grinning.

Severus raised an eyebrow, again, and sat back to wait for the Healer to arrive.


	2. Chapter Two

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer.   


* * *

****

To Heal a Soul

**A/N:** See Chapter One for disclaimers and information. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far!

**Chapter Two**

Healer Applewhite arrived right on schedule, at four o’clock in the afternoon. After casting a curious glance toward Severus and receiving assurances that Severus was welcome to remain present, he began his physical evaluation of Harry, making notes as he cast various spells and scans to assess the progression of the illness.

Once finished, Harry summoned Dobby and the Healer turned over the numerous potions bottles and vials that Harry would require for the following week. Once all necessary instructions had been delivered, Severus approached the Healer.

“Healer Applewhite, if you would be so kind, I would appreciate a basic synopsis of Harry’s illness,” he said. 

The Healer turned to Harry and, at seeing his approval, sat down on the settee and gestured for Severus to do the same.

“Unfortunately, it took us quite by surprise,” he started. “Harry had been in quite the state when he was first brought to us after the battle. He had numerous internal injuries along with several broken bones. We healed him, or at least thought we did.

“It was four months later that he returned to speak to me about a recurring pain in the right epigastric area of his abdomen. I immediately scanned his liver, as he had been previously hit with a hex in that area, causing a laceration. Although we had healed the laceration, what I found in that scan was quite troubling.” Healer Applewhite paused to accept a cup of tea from Dobby, taking a sip while he gathered his thoughts.

“Because of the nature of his previous injury, we were unable to diagnose a secondary effect of the hex. There was a mutation, if you will, on a cellular level. Normally, this could have had either very little effect or caused organ failure, depending on the extent of the mutation. However, because it occurred on his liver, we were then faced with a very dire scenario.”

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” Severus said. “But, why should it matter if it was the liver and not some other organ?”

“That is the crux of the matter,” Healer Applewhite said, shaking his head and sighing heavily. “The liver is capable of mass regeneration. In fact, even Muggles have capitalized on this fact – they are able to transplant portions of a liver from one person to another. Eventually, both pieces of liver will regenerate into fully sized and fully functional organs. In Harry’s case, the mutated portion of the liver regenerated, causing cells to spread to other organs and systems, in a way, infecting them, as well.”

“And there is no way to stop the spread?” Severus asked, his attention split between the Healer sitting next to him and Harry sitting placidly across the room, as if they weren’t calmly discussing his inevitable death.

“If we had caught it sooner, we might have been able to do something. Unfortunately, by the time we had determined the cause of Harry’s pain, the mutation had already spread into too many organs and systems. It had entered his lymph and blood systems, which continued to carry the mutations into every part of his body.”

“I see,” Severus said, the finality of the Healer’s statements weighing heavily on his mind and heart. “Mr. Potter has given me permission to read over his medical file. I would like to take some time with it; perhaps you could make a copy for me?”

“Of course, Mr. Snape. Might I ask what your interest might be?” the Healer asked as he duplicated the large medical file and handed a copy over.

“I am a Potions Master and would like to understand the basis and progression of his illness as much as possible before I take over the making of his required potions,” Severus said, already thumbing through the pages.

“Very well. Harry, as always, please call me if there are any changes. I will see you in one week,” Healer Applewhite said before rising and shaking both his and Severus’ hands. Dobby showed him to the front door and then quickly returned with a dose of Harry’s nutritive potion.

Grimacing at the taste, Harry drank the potion and thanked Dobby, handing the bottle back over. Watching with a careful eye, Severus decided that he would brew an improved version of the nutritive potion first.

“Always up for a challenge, aren’t you, sir?” Harry asked, smiling slightly.

“You have always been a challenge, Mr. Potter,” Severus replied. “I would like to peruse these notes over night. I have a few ideas to begin with; I will return in two days to discuss my findings and recommendations with you.”

“Thank you, sir,” Harry said, meeting his eyes with an unwavering gaze. “I do appreciate anything you would be willing to do to help.”

Severus nodded and rose to show himself to the door.

~~~~~**~~~~~

That night, Severus took no time to sleep. Reading over the thick and heavily detailed medical file, he took notes and cross-referenced several potions journals, trying to track the progression of Harry’s illness. He had a suspicion that, while it might be impossible to stop or reverse the deterioration of Harry’s body, it might be possible to slow it dramatically.

Finally, in the wee hours of the morning, Severus fell into an exhausted sleep, his notes at his bedside. 

After only a few hours of sleep, he was at it again. Taking steps to tackle his first challenge, Severus took the latest information gleaned from the Healer’s most recent scans of Harry the day before and set to develop a more refined version of his nutritive potion. Since Harry was forced to take this potion so often and knowing how badly his usual potion tasted, Severus was determined to alter the formula enough that he could at least make it more pleasing to the palate. Normally, he wouldn’t care how foul a potion tasted. However, Harry’s entire life was ruled by potions. If he could at least make it more bearable, it would be a small victory.

He worked tirelessly throughout the day until he had perfected the potion. With luck, this new formula would increase Harry’s nutritive absorption, helping to gain him some strength. 

Retiring back to his bedchamber, Severus gathered Harry’s medical file once again, looking over the different scans and notes the Healer had taken at each of his previous visits. He was amazed at how well they had managed to deal with the rapid progression of Harry’s illness, but he was troubled by something.

Looking back at his notes, he saw that the potions Harry was forced to take remained the same, regardless of his deterioration. To Severus, this was inconceivable. In order to provide the best care, the potion formulas should be variable… changing as the needs of the patient changed. Any first year Potions’ apprentice should know that. 

Slowly, a plan began to form in the back of Severus’ mind. If he could have access to regular, updated scans of Harry’s condition, he could provide a constantly shifting and evolving stock of potions. With care, he could drastically reduce both the number of potions Harry was forced to take, and the symptoms he was forced to endure.

Of course, he rationalized, it would take multiple scans daily in order to provide the most detailed information for his brewing. Also, if he were to truly commit to this deranged scheme, he would be brewing almost constantly. He would have to take up residence closer to Harry for this to work – in his home would be ideal. 

Severus was sure that Harry would balk at the idea. He wanted his privacy, understandably. Also, to have his previously most-hated Professor suddenly lay siege to his home… this would take some persuasion.

Of course, Severus could see personal gain from his future efforts, as well. Over the past year, since the fall of the Dark Lord and his blessedly peaceful retreat from Hogwarts, he had spent most of his time on research and development. Harry’s situation, while amazingly rare and complex, could provide a plethora of information for articles, papers, development of new potions… Severus almost salivated at the thought of what might come from this unfortunate situation.

Finally giving into the pull of sleep, Severus was determined to convince Harry to agree to his plan.

~~~~~**~~~~~

“Are you bloody insane?” Harry asked, his mouth gaping as his forgotten cup of tea nearly slipped from his grasp, only to be saved by Dobby’s fortuitous arrival to the room.

“Some have believed so,” Severus answered calmly, taking another almond biscuit from the plate on the table before him. “However, I assure you that I am in full possession of my faculties at this time.”

“So, what you’re saying, is that you want to move into my house and become some sort of personal caretaker?”

“No, Mr. Potter. What I am proposing is that you allow me some house space so that I may be available to perform regular diagnostic scans tracking the progression of your illness. With that up-to-date information, I will be able to brew personalized potions for you,” Snape explained, trying to maintain his calm façade and not give into the warring factions of irritation and excitement building within him.

Harry shook his head in disbelief as he warily eyed Severus. “I understand that you feel indebted to Dumbledore in some way and want to try to help, but this is ridiculous.”

“In what way is it ridiculous?” Severus countered.

“In every way,” Harry exclaimed, spilling his tea onto the floor. Severus watched as Dobby appeared and cleaned the mess, replacing the cup of tea and disappearing again, without Harry taking any notice.

“While you may be content to hide away and suffer through vile and ineffective potions, I feel, as a Potions Master of the highest order, that I would be remiss in allowing you to continue to do so.”

“So, out of the goodness of your heart, you’re going to put your life on hold to try and extend mine by a few short weeks or months,” Harry probed, keeping a wary eye on Severus.

“Now, Mr. Potter, you know me better than that,” Severus answered with a smirk. “While doing this would certainly fulfill any promise or debt to Albus, it also has quite a few benefits for myself.” At Harry’s look of incomprehension, he put his teacup down and leaned forward. “Just think of the publishing opportunities.”

Harry snorted and then fell completely into a mirthful laughter. “How silly of me to think that this was simply for my benefit. By all means, please, make yourself at home.”

Severus couldn’t help but warm at the sight of Harry’s laughter. Whether he wanted to admit it to himself, or not, Harry Potter had become important to the bitter and jaded wizard. If all he could do was make his remaining months more comfortable and eventually ease his passing, so be it. If anyone deserved a little peace, it was Harry Potter.

~~~~~**~~~~~

The next day, Severus had moved into the spare room next to Harry’s bedroom. With the help of Dobby, he had converted a section of the cellar into a lab suitable for the many hours he would be spending brewing.

After presenting him with the revamped formula of his nutritive potion the prior day, the last of Harry’s arguments had fallen away. Severus wouldn’t soon forget the look of surprise and joy on Harry’s face when he first tasted the potion. Rather than the vile, sour concoction to which he had become accustomed, he was rewarded with a sweet, fruity flavor that was much easier on his stomach. 

Once the new lab space was sufficiently ordered, Severus took the first of his scans, detailing the current state of Harry’s illness. Harry sat unconcernedly as Severus scribbled furiously on a parchment, flipping idly through his medical file and comparing notes. 

“So what’s next?” Harry asked warily as Severus mumbled to himself over his work.

Without looking up, Severus snapped his fingers to summon Dobby. “You take your next potions doses and leave me to work out some formulas. I’ll begin working in the lab tomorrow morning.”

“Oh, okay,” Harry answered, accepting the vials from Dobby and downing the various potions. “Is there anything you need?”

“Other than peace and quiet?” Severus asked, still not looking up from his notes.

“Well, I’ll just turn in for the night, then.”

“Very well. Good night, Mr. Potter.”

“Good night.”

~~~~~**~~~~~

The following day was a productive one. Severus was able to reformulate four of the eight potions that Harry took on a regular basis. Of course, the potions would have to be tweaked and adjusted often, but once this first, hardest step was taken, the rest of the work could be accomplished with much less effort.

After bottling the new potions and cleaning from the day’s work, Severus climbed the stairs, hoping for a hot meal and a strong cup of tea. As was his wont, he had worked through lunch, needing to tend the different potions to assure a positive outcome for his brewing.

Passing by the sitting room, he heard voices and paused by the doorway to listen in for a moment.

“Yes, Hermione, I’ve been taking all my potions,” Harry was saying as he kneeled in front of the fireplace. 

“It’s just that you look a little more run-down than last week. We’re worried about you, Harry.” Hermione Granger’s head was just visible in the green flames beyond Harry’s body.

“I’m sure you have plenty more to worry about other than me,” Harry said. “For instance, you should be worrying about how you’re ever going to get Ron to propose to you.”

Severus could see a blush appear on the witch’s face and he heard an expletive emerge from the flames behind her head. Obviously, Ron Weasley found fault with Harry’s statement. Severus smirked in amusement at the Gryffindor’s attempts to remove the focus from his failing health.

“Harry…” she admonished, still blushing.

Harry snickered and said, “Enough of all this, now. You have plenty to be getting on with. Go on and make your reports to all the interested parties that I’m fine and holding my own and then get on with your own business. Go to work, get on with your disgustingly heterosexual sex with Ron, and enjoy Sunday dinner at the Burrow.”

“You promise to firecall if you need anything?”

“Don’t I always?” Harry responded.

“We’ll talk to you next week, Harry. We love you.”

“I love you, too, Hermione. Give Ron a big, wet, sloppy kiss from me.”

Severus heard yet another expletive from the background before Harry could close the connection. He smirked and was about to let loose some form of scathing comment about Harry’s friends when he heard a whimper come from Harry, who was still kneeling on the floor in front of the fireplace.

“Harry, are you all right?” he asked as he quickly crossed the room and bent to help the younger wizard up from the floor.

“I’m fine, sir,” Harry replied, although his pale features and slight trembling belied his words. “Thank you for helping me up. I think it’s time for me to turn in for the night.”

“Before you go, I have some new potions for you.” Handing over the new nutritive and strengthening potions, he watched as Harry swallowed them quickly.

“Why is it that suddenly all my potions taste so much better?” Harry asked with a small smile.

“I assumed you would rather not suffer needlessly. If you would rather, I could always revert back to the original formulas.”

“No need, sir. Thank you. I appreciate the effort,” Harry said weakly. “I’ll be off to bed, then.”

“Harry,” Severus called before he could leave the room. “If you need anything, you can always call on me.”

“Thank you, sir,” Harry replied, offering another small smile before retreating to his bedroom.

Sighing heavily, Severus turned and walked to the kitchen, summoning Dobby for his dinner. Once he was alone with his thoughts, he couldn’t help but worry about the young man’s dwindling health. Strengthening his resolve, he vowed to find a way to help Harry… no matter the effort or consequences.


	3. Chapter Three

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer.   


* * *

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To Heal a Soul

_A/N: Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to review. Just to reassure my readers... this is NOT a deathfic. I just can't do that to my boys! So, feel free to continue reading with a lighter heart!_

**Chapter Three**

Severus awoke suddenly, blinking in the pre-dawn light. Something had roused him from sleep, although he couldn’t figure out what that was. Nothing was amiss in his room. He strained his hearing, listening for anything that could be the culprit.

When he heard a loud thump, he was out of bed in a shot and hurrying out of his room and into the one next door – Harry’s bedroom. The bed was empty, but had evidently been slept in; the sheets were trailing off the side haphazardly. Hearing a soft moan, Severus moved to the other side of the bed and found Harry lying on the floor and barely conscious.

Lifting him back onto the bed, Severus was shocked at how easy it was to move him. Harry weighed next to nothing. Harry had broken into a slick sweat and was shivering. One touch to his skin revealed a much higher than normal temperature. 

“Dobby,” Severus called, summoning the house-elf. When he popped into the room, he gasped in shock at the sight of his beloved master. “Go to my room and fetch my potions kit. It is in the black satchel next to the bed. I’ll also need my wand from the bedside table. Then, go to the lab and fetch two vials of the fever reducer – it is on the third shelf on the left, labeled in purple ink.”

Dobby nodded and vanished, returning only seconds later with the required items. Running a quick diagnostic scan, Severus was dismayed by the findings. Harry’s immunity was dreadfully low and he had somehow contracted a flu virus. In his weakened state, a simple virus could be fatal.

Gently coaxing the mostly unconscious wizard, Severus managed to get the fever reducer into him. Once his temperature had lowered to more normal levels, he left Harry in Dobby’s care. Leaving strict instructions to summon him if Harry’s condition should change in any way, he retreated to the lab.

Over the next few hours, Severus brewed a new batch of strengthening solution along with the new nutritive potion and a potent antiviral. Exhausted, but hopeful, Severus hurried back to Harry’s bedroom with the potions. Severus was pleased to see that, while still extremely weak, Harry had regained a lucid consciousness. 

“Harry, you’ve contracted a flu virus that is further weakening you. I have a few potions that should help,” he explained, sitting down on the bed next to him. 

Nodding feebly, Harry tried to grasp the first bottle, only to be wracked with tremors. Severus reached out to steady his hand and took back the bottle. Moving closer, he reached an arm around Harry to help him sit up a little higher in the bed. Meeting his surprised gaze, Severus arched an eyebrow questioningly, asking for permission to assist the proud wizard. Harry blinked tiredly and relaxed against Severus’ arm. With this silent acquiescence, Severus brought the first bottle to Harry’s lips and helped him to drink the healing potion.

Severus repeated his actions with the other two vials and then carefully lowered Harry back down to the bed, smoothing the bedclothes around his body.

“Are you experiencing any nausea?” Severus asked while running a new diagnostic scan.

“No, I just feel really weak and tired,” Harry answered, turning his head to look at Severus. “Thank you, for helping me.”

Severus halted his scans for a moment, taken aback by the unexpected emotion he felt at Harry’s gratitude. Resuming once again, he made sure to school his features before answering.

“You’re welcome, Harry.”

“You realize that you’ve been calling me by my given name since yesterday,” Harry said with a small smile.

Severus turned and met Harry’s gaze, surprised at the easy statement. “Actually, I hadn’t noticed. If you are uncomfortable with it, I will try to be more formal.”

“No,” Harry said quickly. “I like it. It’s just new… hearing you call me that. I’m used to ‘Potter’ or ‘brat’ or ‘insolent whelp’,” he said, his smile widening.

“In that case, I will endeavor to continue. However, I make no promises that I will not revert to one of the previous addresses. If you warrant being called an insolent whelp, I will have no choice but to call you such.”

“So, does this mean I get to call you ‘Sev’?” Harry asked with a smirk worthy of a Slytherin.

Not bothering to suppress the shudder that went through him at the horrid nickname, Severus turned a malevolent gaze toward Harry. “If you do, I will not be held responsible for my actions against you, brat. However, if you must, you may call me Severus.”

“In that case, thank you, Severus,” Harry said softly, blinking tiredly. “For everything.”

“Get some rest, Harry. I will be here should you need anything,” Severus replied, watching as Harry rapidly gave in to sleep. 

Concerned for the young wizard, Severus took up residence in the armchair across the room, keeping a wary eye on him as he slept. When Harry awoke several hours later, Severus was much relieved to find that his fever had not returned and that the diagnostic scans showed no further sign of the virus. 

Summoning Dobby, Severus ordered some broth for Harry, encouraging him to drink it to help regain some of his strength. Once he was sure that Harry was not experiencing any more tremors, he left him with his broth and retreated, once more, to the lab.

By the end of the evening, he had managed to reformulate the remaining potions Harry needed. With that large task completed, he would hopefully only need to spend a couple of hours each day in the lab adjusting them as the scans necessitated. 

Stopping by Harry’s room, he found Harry fast asleep, looking quite peaceful. Closing the door silently, he summoned Dobby.

“Has Harry taken his nightly potions?” he asked.

“Yes, Master Snape, sir. Mister Harry Potter is feeling much better this evening, sir. Looking much better, too,” the house-elf answered, beaming at the Potions Master.

“Very good, Dobby. Thank you for your assistance today. I shall be retiring for the night, now,” he said, turning to enter his room.

“But, Master Snape, sir, you is not eating any dinner yet,” Dobby said, grabbing Severus’ sleeve.

“There is no need, Dobby. I am much more tired than hungry tonight,” Severus said, pulling away from the over-excitable elf.

“But, Mister Harry Potter is asking that I make sure that Master Snape sir is taking care of himself,” Dobby said, worrying the frayed jumper he wore. “Please, Master Snape, sir. Please be allowing Dobby to bring you something to eat.”

Severus watched Dobby for a moment, amusement warring with irritation as the house-elf steadily worked himself into a lather over not being able to follow Harry’s instructions. However, as much as he would have liked to deny the request, just on principle, the fact that Harry was concerned that he would see to his own needs intrigued him.

“Very well, Dobby. A sandwich and a cup of tea will do. Please bring them to my bedroom,” he said, leaving the visibly relieved house-elf as he turned and entered his bedroom, passing straight into the en-suite to wash up from his day of brewing.

After performing his evening ablutions, he returned to his bedroom to find not only the requested sandwich and tea, but also a plate of almond biscuits. Smiling despite himself, he found he was pleased that the house-elf had noticed his liking for the treat.

Eating quickly, but feeling all the better for actually having done so, Severus made a few notes on Harry’s progress and the brewing he had completed and then fell happily into bed. Within moments, he was soundly asleep.

~~~~~**~~~~~

Two days later, Healer Applewhite made a return appearance in Harry’s sitting room. If he was surprised to see Severus once more ensconced on the settee, he made no mention of it. Running his typical scans, he began making notes, only to look back at the previous scans and then run some more.

“Harry,” he said, looking confused. “How have you been feeling this week?”

“Much the same,” he answered, shrugging. “I had a little trouble with a flu virus, but luckily Severus was here to help.” Severus had to work hard not to return the smile that Harry cast in his direction. “Although, I have noticed that I’ve had less tremors over the last two days.”

“I see,” the Healer said, looking back at his notes again. “Mr. Snape, you have been brewing new potions for him this week, correct?”

“Yes, I have, but only for the last five days,” Severus replied. 

“Could you provide me with a listing of the changes you have made to his potions regimen?”

“Of course,” Severus said, pulling the already-prepared list from his pocket. “Is there a problem, sir?”

“Quite the contrary,” the Healer said, looking over the list. “Over the past four months, each week Harry had shown a marked decline in his health. I see no decline at all since the scans I performed last week,” he explained. “In fact, Harry, you have gained two pounds and for the first time in two months, your iron levels are normal. In addition, your magical levels are the highest I’ve seen them in three months.”

“What are you saying?” Harry asked, leaning forward in his seat.

“I’m saying, whatever Mr. Snape is doing is working wonders. I don’t know if this trend will continue and, of course, in no way should you expect your bodily deterioration to stop, Harry. However, this new regimen could very well extend your life immeasurably.”

“Severus,” Harry started, meeting his eyes. Severus could see the first signs of moisture gathering there. 

“Now, now, Mr. Potter,” Severus said, uncomfortable with the evident gratitude pouring off of Harry. “Let us save the platitudes until this wonder lasts longer than a week, shall we?”

Nodding shakily, Harry sat back in his seat and visibly reined in his emotions. Working to maintain his own unaffected mask, Severus turned back to the Healer.

“With your approval, I would like to take Harry off of his iron infusion, since his levels are normal,” Severus said.

“Sure, let’s try that. With any luck, this new nutritive potion you’ve been brewing for him will be sufficient. Harry, as always, I’m just a firecall away,” Healer Applewhite said, rising from his seat and collecting his notes. Dobby appeared and showed him to the door, only to return with some soft eggs and toast for Harry.

Severus rose to leave, taking the latest scan information to study to make any necessary changes to Harry’s potions. Before he could leave the room, however, he was stopped when Harry called to him.

“Severus… I don’t know how to thank you,” he said, his voice slightly tremulous. 

“You needn’t have to, Harry,” he answered, not quite able to say anything more. He left the room quickly, fleeing from the look of absolute adoration adorning Harry’s face.

Shutting his bedroom door behind him, he shakily sat down in the armchair by his bed, running a weary hand over his face. 

No one had ever looked at him in such a way before. While he had already admitted to himself that there was a newfound warmth in his feelings toward the younger wizard, he had written it off as respect with a touch of grief for the knowledge of all that Harry had gone through in his short life. But after the way Harry had looked at him… it was as if Harry thought Severus had hung the moon for him. He found that he wanted to see Harry continue to look at him in that way.

He silently cursed himself for this new weakness. In no way was it appropriate for him to have these sorts of feelings for Harry. First of all, Harry was quite ill. While the potions so far seem to be helping, there was no cure for the illness wracking his body. Sooner or later, Harry’s body was going to deteriorate to a point where no potion would help him. 

Secondly, even if, as unlikely as it was, Harry did develop some sort of other-than-friendly feelings for him, it would not be based in any sort of reality. Severus knew that Harry’s health, what little there was of it, was completely dependent upon the potions he would brew for him. Any besotted looks or warm gazes from Harry would undeniably be irreparably intermixed with that truth. 

Sighing heavily, he massaged his temples with his potion-stained fingers, trying to abate the headache worming its way through his skull. Severus resigned himself to the one truth that had been omnipresent in his life. No matter what the circumstances, he was fated to be alone – forced to participate in all the most unpleasant tasks. It only emphasized his belief more that, now that he had admitted that he could have feelings for someone, that someone was dying.

Before his thoughts could turn even more maudlin, he was interrupted by a tentative knock to his door. Wearily lifting himself from his seat, he opened the door and came face to face with the object of his melancholic ruminations.

“I just wanted to make sure that you were okay,” Harry said, shuffling his feet and looking a bit uncomfortable.

“I am fine, Harry,” Severus replied, ensuring that his usual mask was firmly in place.

“Would you like some dinner? You could take it in the sitting room. I was just going to start a new book and wouldn’t mind the company,” Harry said, looking almost pleadingly at the taller man.

His mind was screaming at him to step back and increase the space between them, to not accept the invitation and return to wallowing in his self-pity. However, that same hopefulness was back in Harry’s eyes and Severus could not find the strength to listen to his mind. 

“Since you have recently become so concerned as to my eating habits, it would be my pleasure to take dinner where you can witness the event,” he said, smirking slightly. At Harry’s slight blush, however, the smirk somehow turned into a genuine smile. “I’d be happy for the company, as well, Harry.” Severus briefly thought that Harry’s smile could melt even the hardest of hearts at that moment.

Once they were settled together in the sitting room, a bowl of lamb stew steaming in front of Severus, they fell into an easy and comfortable silence. As Harry tried to make himself as comfortable as possible, stretched out on the settee with a light blanket covering him, Severus curiously looked to see what book it was that had caught Harry’s attention.

“And what would the name of this literary masterpiece be?” Severus asked, only slightly mockingly.

“It’s a book called ‘Salem’s Lot. It’s written by Stephen King. Have you ever read any of his books?” Harry asked.

“No, I have not,” Severus said, intrigued by the Harry’s choice of book. He had heard of King and knew that he wrote in the horror genre. He would never have thought Harry would enjoy that type of story. After all, he had lived through more horror than most could ever imagine. “What, pray tell, is this book about?”

“Vampires,” Harry answered with a wide grin. “I’ve been wanting to read this book for the longest time. I actually feel good enough to start it, now.”

“May I?” Severus asked, reaching over to read the back jacket of the book. He had to admit, he was intrigued by the premise of the book. “It looks to be a fairly interesting read.”

Harry took the book back and paused before beginning to read. “Would you like me to read aloud?” Harry asked excitedly. “Since you seem interested, it might be fun to enjoy it together, don’t you think?”

“By all means, Harry. It has been quite some time since I have had the pleasure of a dramatic reading performed for my pleasure.”

Harry laughed as he thumbed open the book. Turning to the first chapter he began to read. “‘Almost everyone thought that the man and the boy were father and son.’”

Severus sat back and let Harry’s pleasant voice flow over him. After all, if Harry was actually feeling well enough to start this long anticipated book, who was he to deny him.

 

_A/N: ‘Salem’s Lot is written by Stephen King. The quote from that book is in fact the first sentence of the story. It is one of my favorite books and I used it with only the best intentions and with the utmost respect. _


	4. Chapter Four

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer.   


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To Heal a Soul

**Chapter Four**

Over the next several weeks, Severus found himself falling into a comfortable routine. In fact, it was almost shocking how easily the two men melded their lives. Each morning, Severus would complete a new scan and then retreat to the lab to brew for a few hours, making the minute adjustments necessary to the potions that would enable Harry to maintain his current level of health.

They would take lunch together in the sitting room, engaging in discussions or taking turns reading aloud from whatever book had recently caught Harry’s fancy. If they occasionally found themselves sitting a tad closer than normal, there was certainly no one around to mention it. If Severus’ gaze sometimes lingered a little too long on Harry’s features, he could almost convince himself that he was merely checking on Harry’s color. If Harry’s hand brushed against his a little more than necessary when passing the biscuits, well, obviously it was nothing more than a gesture of gratitude for his company.

Severus could admit that he was content; it was a strange feeling for him. For more than twenty years, his life had not been his own. With the demise of the Dark Lord, he was finally free to pursue his own wants and interests. At first, he had resented being asked to provide his services once more for “The Chosen One”. However, he was stunned with how quickly his situation had changed. 

Almost immediately, he found that trying to make things easier for Harry was exactly what he _wanted_ to do. That realization had come as quite the surprise. Severus had always prided himself on knowing his place in the world – what he expected of others and what was expected of him. However, once again, Harry Potter had blown all of his beliefs and expectations completely apart.

Severus had come to truly enjoy the time they spent together, reading or discussing varying topics of debate. Learning that Harry had read many of the classics had pleasantly surprised him. They had spent more than one evening debating the merits of Shakespeare over Bacon or Austen versus Barrett Browning. He was strangely pleased to learn that Harry had been the one to suggest the Wizard Studies class to the Headmistress – creating an equalizer to match the Muggles Studies course already provided. He was proud of Harry for having such insight as to see a need and helping to provide the solution.

One of his favorite moments had been when Harry had explained to his friends during their weekly firecall as to what was helping to make him look and feel so much better. Severus had stood in the background, smirking and enjoying himself, as Ronald Weasley threatened to have Harry tested for the Imperius Curse. He found himself shocked, speechless, and surprisingly touched, however, when Harry staunchly defended him to his two best friends. It was then that he remembered that it was he, Severus, who was staying in Harry’s house, spending time with him, and not Ronald Weasley or Hermione Granger. 

It got to the point where Severus could almost forget the actual circumstances which had brought him into Harry’s home. While, of course, there were minor setbacks in Harry’s health from time to time, for the most part, he had achieved a sort of plateau where he remained relatively stable. Of course, as in all things, trouble would strike when least expected.

Severus had just settled into the chair across from the settee, on which Harry was sprawled comfortably, when he noticed the mischievous glint in his eyes.

“From the look on your face, I can only assume that the drivel you have chosen for us to read this week is even worse than your usual fare,” Severus said, the normal sneer in his voice surprisingly soft.

Harry gave a look of mock-offense, although he couldn’t keep the smile from his face. “I’ll have you know that Douglas Adams is lauded as a literary genius.”

Severus was about to respond when suddenly, the book Harry had been holding fell to the floor. Looking up, he watched with horror as all the color drained from Harry’s face and his eyes rolled back in his head. Instantly leaping to action, Severus lurched across the small space, reaching Harry just as he started convulsing madly. Wrapping his arms tightly around Harry to try and control the spasms, Severus called frantically for Dobby. Popping into the room, Dobby looked about to panic at the sight of his beloved master and friend.

“Dobby, stay calm,” Severus implored, trying to follow his own advice. “I need you to fetch Healer Applewhite immediately, do you understand?”

Dobby nodded shakily and popped away quickly. Severus was left with nothing to do but try to protect Harry from injuring himself. Holding Harry’s jerking body tightly against his body, he found himself praying to whatever deities might be listening to please not take Harry… not yet. Although he had come into this situation knowing what the eventual outcome would most assuredly be, he knew that he wasn’t ready. He couldn’t envision his life anymore without Harry in it.

“Please, Harry,” he pleaded with the still-convulsing man. “Hang on, please. You can’t go yet. Not yet. Hang on, Harry. I’ve got you; do you hear me? I’ve got you.”

Severus was so focused on Harry that he was unaware of when Dobby returned with the Healer, and so was surprised when he felt a strong hand grasp his shoulder. Looking up anxiously, he had to struggle to retain the façade of calm.

“Mr. Snape… Severus,” Healer Applewhite said in a soothing voice. “Just keep holding him. I’m going to run some scans, okay?”

Severus nodded, fighting to maintain his hold on Harry as he thrashed.

“How long has he been seizing?” the Healer asked as he ran his wand over Harry’s forehead.

“Er, I don’t… a few minutes… I think?” Severus sputtered.

Before the Healer could ask anything further, Harry’s body finally collapsed weakly against Severus. Harry was breathing raggedly and he remained unconscious. For a moment, the only sound in the room was the Healer’s soft chanting of spells, Harry’s shallow breathing, and in Severus’ mind, the frantic beating of his own heart.

“I’d like to move him to his bed,” Healer Applewhite said. “He appears to be stable for the moment, so I’ll get a couple of potions into him and then, if you’re willing, I’d like to take a few minutes to speak with you.”

“Of course,” Severus answered, lifting Harry easily in his arms and carrying him to his room. Once he was settled in his bed, Severus ran a slightly shaking hand across Harry’s brow, moving the sweat-dampened hair, and taking in the extreme pallor of his face.

Healer Applewhite Ennervated Harry briefly, just long enough to get a few healing potions into him. Severus briefly wished that he had had the opportunity to brew the needed potions, but the thought fled quickly as Harry, obviously confused and barely conscious, softly mumbled, “Severus,” before lapsing back into unconsciousness.

Severus’ heart stopped for the briefest of moments when he heard his name whispered from Harry’s lips. However, before he could ponder over the strangeness of that event, Healer Applewhite was ushering him back out of the room.

Requesting tea from Dobby, the Healer guided Severus over to the settee and waited for him to take a seat. Pulling another chair closer, Severus had a sudden flash of fear race through his body.

“Mr. Snape,” he started, accepting his tea and taking a small sip. “If I may ask, what exactly is your relationship with Harry?”

“Why do you need to know?” Severus asked, gripping his teacup tightly.

“I need to know because the information we are about to discuss is sensitive,” he explained, meeting and holding Severus’ eyes with a serious gaze. 

Sighing heavily, Severus placed his teacup back on the table, suddenly losing any desire to drink it.

“Ours is a… complicated relationship to explain,” he said, running a hand tremulously through his hair. “First and foremost, I suppose the title of Personal Potions Brewer would best apply. As you know, I’ve taken up residence here to ensure that Harry is provided with the best potions for his ever-changing condition. However, more importantly, at least to me, is that I consider him to be a friend. Perhaps my only one,” he finished in a whisper.

Healer Applewhite sat back and watched as Severus struggled with his warring emotions. “So, am I correct in assuming that, as Personal Potions Brewer to Harry, you are, in fact, a sort of caretaker?” he prompted, as he leaned forward and gave Severus a direct and piercing gaze.

Severus caught on immediately to what the Healer was implying. As a Healer, there are only certain people to whom he could legally impart this type of medical information. Meeting the direct gaze with one of his own, Severus said, “Yes, Healer Applewhite. At present, I am the primary caregiver to Harry Potter.”

Nodding approvingly, Healer Applewhite sat back and took up his teacup once again.

“I’m not going to mince words here, Mr. Snape. Harry has hit a turning point… one we knew was coming,” he said, sadness tinting his voice. “Frankly, I am amazed at the level of health he has maintained over the past two months, and I know that it is because of your potion brewing that he has managed this long. When you first arrived, I had given him the prognosis to expect, at the most, a few more weeks before his body finally failed him. Instead, he has had two months of almost normal-functioning, thanks to you.”

“What is your prognosis now?” Severus asked, his voice slightly tremulous.

“He has, perhaps, only another two months before his organs begin to shut down due to the already present damage. However, this seizure is what concerns me the most.”

“In what way?” Severus inquired.

“Just by the severity and length of the seizure, this shows that the damage to his neurological pathways has begun to worsen. I had hopes that the damage would be restricted to his tremors, but unfortunately, this does not seem to be the case any longer,” the Healer said, rubbing his eyes wearily. “This could be the first sign of a series of neurological deteriorations.”

“What can we expect, then?” Severus asked, an icy fear beginning to flow through his veins.

“There is the possibility of more tremors, further seizures, memory lapses, blackouts, lapses of consciousness, and dementia.”

Severus drew a ragged breath, wishing he could ignore the grim possibilities which had been laid before him.

“As I said,” the Healer continued, “Harry is stable for now and will probably sleep for a few hours. I can come back after he awakens to explain the situation, if you would like.”

“Would it be all right if I were the one to tell him?” Severus asked, somehow needing to be the one to impart this news. 

Nodding, Healer Applewhite said, “That could be for the best. Harry has come to depend on you, Mr. Snape. I think he might take the news better this way. If you need me, for any reason at all, please do not hesitate to contact me.”

Severus dazedly agreed and showed the Healer out, quickly returning to his spot on the settee. Resting his head in his hands, he finally allowed the truth to sink in. Harry was going to die. He was going to fade away before his eyes. In reality, he had known that all along. However, there was one more truth tied inextricably in with all of this. Harry was going to die… and Severus was in love with him.

One ragged sob escaped from Severus’ throat before he reined in his emotions and let his feet carry him into Harry’s room once more. 

Looking down at the thin, frail creature splayed out across the bed, Severus’ heart gave a painful lurch. He couldn’t fathom how he had arrived at this place… when had he taken the turn that had irreparably taken him from his staid and controlled path?

He reached a hand out and once again smoothed the hair from Harry’s forehead, allowing himself the comfort of watching Harry’s steady breaths and serene features. The sensation must have roused Harry a bit from his slumber, because he turned into Severus’ hand, pressing against it as he sighed in his sleep.

It was at that moment that Severus came to a decision. Harry was not going to die.

As ever in his life, once Severus decided on a path, he did not stray from it. Well, other than this mess with his disastrously torturous feelings for the whelp. Leaving Harry’s bedroom and shutting the door softly behind him, he summoned Dobby.

“Harry is resting comfortably for now, Dobby,” he explained to the grief-stricken house-elf. “I must leave and go to Hogwarts for a while, but I will be back shortly. If he awakens before I return, keep him calm and have him remain in bed. I will explain everything to him when I am back.”

“Yes, Master Snape, sir,” Dobby said, wringing his hands and casting desperate looks at Harry’s bedroom door.

“If there are any problems, first retrieve Healer Applewhite and then come and get me immediately.”

“Yes, of course, Master Snape, sir,” Dobby said, looking up at him with watery eyes. “You is a good wizard, sir. Mister Harry Potter is very lucky to be having you, sir.”

Severus jolted a bit at Dobby’s words, but kept his stride as he turned and rushed out of Harry’s house, Apparating to the gates of Hogwarts.

Making a beeline for the Library, it was only moments before Minerva joined him, the wards having alerted her to his arrival.

“Severus, are you all right? How is Harry?” she asked anxiously, obviously distressed at Severus’ desperate appearance.

“He is not well, Minerva,” Severus said as he hunted through the stacks, pulling books, in what he was sure looked to be a random pattern.

“What can I do, Severus?”

“I have no idea,” he answered, heading for the Restricted Section.

“So, it is beginning?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Yes,” he replied curtly. “But I’m stopping it.”

“What do you mean?” Minerva said, her head snapping up as she pierced him with a fevered gaze.

“Harry’s not going to die. I won’t allow it.”

“But, Severus, there’s nothing more to be done… all the best Healers…” she faltered, emotion flooding into her normally controlled voice.

“I don’t care what in the nine hells ‘all the best Healers’ have to say on the matter. He’s not going to die. I’m going to find something… anything.”

“Do you have a plan?” Minerva asked.

Severus didn’t answer. His mind was whirring at a frenetic pace. A plan. Harry was teetering above the abyss and he knew there must be a way to save him. All he needed was to find it.

_A/N: Okay… Nurse Shannon here… just for knowledge sake, if you are ever in the presence of someone who begins to have a seizure, do NOT restrain him/her in any way. Clear the space around him/her to ensure that there is nothing present that he/she can injure him/herself on. Put something soft under his/her head, if possible. If he/she is already seizing and his/her jaw is clenched, NEVER try to force it open to put something in his/her mouth. That might cause damage to his/her jaw or you might end up injured, yourself. Okay, that’s my public service announcement for today. Thanks for reading! Remember to leave a review… authors love that stuff!_


	5. Chapter Five

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. NOT A DEATHFIC!!!  


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To Heal a Soul

_A/N: My eternal gratitude must now go to rdwind who, even though she is recuperating from major surgery, jumped in to beta this story. Thanks, hon! This is gonna be fun!_

**Chapter Five**

Having taken several books from the Hogwarts library, Severus made one quick stop to his home in Spinner’s End to collect a few _questionable_ books that he kept in his own private library. As loathe as he was to use any sort of Dark magic anymore, if there was something that might help Harry, he’d do it in a heartbeat.

He returned to the house and went quickly to Harry’s bedside, confirming with Dobby that Harry had remained asleep the entire time. Putting down his large cache of books by the armchair, he moved beside Harry and gently brushed the limp hair off of his forehead. 

Although he was concerned that Harry was still unconscious, he was relieved to see that his pallor had improved. Unable to stop himself, he slowly leaned down and placed a light kiss to Harry’s faded lightning bolt-shaped scar. Inhaling deeply, Severus cherished Harry’s scent before righting himself, settling into the armchair, and picking up the first of many books to begin his research.

It was soon after that Severus heard the first sounds of Harry stirring. Looking up worriedly, he met the tired and confused stare of the young man he had come to care more about than he cared to admit.

“Harry,” he said softly. “How are you feeling?” Marking his page, Severus closed the book and placed it atop the others before rising and moving back to Harry’s bedside.

Harry looked around the room, accepting his glasses gratefully when Severus placed them in his hand. 

“I’m feeling quite knackered, actually,” he said, a crease marring his forehead. “What happened?”

“What is the last thing you remember?” Severus asked as he returned to his seat, needing to place some distance between them for what was to come.

Harry closed his eyes and thought for a moment, still looking a bit dazed and confused. “I remember that we had breakfast and you went down to the lab. I started to look through the new books I just received from the bookstore to pick out one to start reading this afternoon,” he said, running a shaking hand through his hair. “That’s it.”

Severus sighed heavily, wishing he could forestall telling Harry the events which had transpired since then. “I finished my morning brewing and joined you for lunch in the sitting room. You were just showing me the book you had chosen when you fell back and began convulsing. Dobby fetched Healer Applewhite, who stayed with us until you finished and then ran some diagnostic scans.”

The expression on Harry’s face changed from one of confusion to one of sadness and then quickly to resigned acceptance. It hurt Severus to see that expression appear so easily there.

“So, what’s the prognosis, then?” Harry asked flatly.

“The Healer believes that this was a turning point. Your neural pathways have begun to deteriorate. He believes that, even with the personalized potions I am preparing for you, it will only be a couple of months before your organs begin to shut down.”

“I see,” Harry said. “That’s not all he said, though, is it?”

“No,” Severus answered, fortifying himself to relay the rest of the news. “With the damage spreading once more to your neurological system, he expects that there could be more tremors and seizures, losses of consciousness, and possibly memory lapses and dementia.”

Harry closed his eyes, breathing deeply for a moment. Severus wished there was something he could do to help, but, having little experience in the comforting of others, he was unsure of how to proceed. He sat stiffly in his chair, waiting for Harry to process the new information.

“Well, we knew it was only a matter of time,” Harry said stoically, a sad smile gracing his face. “In fact, I’ve already had longer than the Healer initially thought I would.”

“Harry…” Severus began, unsure of what it was he wanted to say.

“Severus, don’t worry. This is something that I’ve been prepared for… everything is in place and I’ve made peace with it.”

Severus closed his eyes wearily, hating the calm tone of Harry’s voice.

“I’m really quite exhausted,” Harry said, easing himself back down in the bed. “I’m afraid I’m not very good company tonight.”

“Would you mind terribly if I remained here for a while?” Severus asked, needing to remain close by where he could see Harry.

Smiling quizzically, Harry said, “If you really want to, I see no reason why not.”

Severus nodded and picked up his book, returning to where he had left off.

“Severus,” Harry said softly, a few moments later.

“Yes, Harry?”

“Thank you…for staying and taking care of me. It…er…it means a lot to me that you did.”

“You’re welcome, Harry.”

“And, Severus?”

“Hmm?”

“Did you…er…what I mean is…I think…” Harry floundered.

“What, Harry?” Severus prompted.

“When I was waking up, I thought…I thought I felt someone kiss my forehead,” he said, looking warily up at Severus and worrying the blanket between his fingers.

Severus blushed, which was a first in his memory. “I am sorry, Harry. I was quite… overcome by the events of today.”

Harry studied him for a moment, looking as though he was searching for something to say. Finally, he took a deep breath and said, “Would you do it again?”

Severus stopped breathing, his eyes wide. Harry could not possibly have just asked him to kiss him… again. Gasping in a sharp breath, Severus found he couldn’t find his voice. He could feel his hands tremble as they clutched at his book, just slightly.

“I mean, if you wouldn’t mind,” Harry said hurriedly. “It’s just that…it was nice. I thought it was a dream,” he said in barely more than a whisper.

Severus found himself rising and walking over to Harry’s bedside. The room seemed preternaturally quiet and Severus was sure that even Harry could hear the pounding of his heart. Bending low, he watched as Harry’s eyes fluttered closed and his mouth opened slightly as his breath quickened. Taking another moment to breathe in Harry’s scent once more, he pressed his lips against the cool, dry skin of his forehead.

He heard Harry sigh at the contact and his own eyes shut at the sound. After a moment, he reluctantly pulled away, opening his eyes and meeting Harry’s gaze.

“Thank you,” Harry whispered.

“You’re welcome,” Severus whispered back.

That sad, resigned smile came back to grace Harry’s lips once more. “It figures,” he said, his voice still in an undertone.

“What, Harry?”

“It’s just par for the course in my life. Just as I find something I truly want, it’s out of reach.”

“I’m not giving up yet, Harry,” Severus said, his voice still hushed as he sat on the bed beside Harry. “I’m going to find a way to stop this.”

“Why?” Harry asked, reaching a hand up to tuck a lock of hair behind Severus’ ear.

“Because it is rare that I find something that _I_ truly want,” he said.

Harry smiled brightly at his answer and Severus couldn’t help but return it. “Well, that’s quite a statement, Professor.”

Severus brought his hand up and cupped Harry’s cheek, amazed when Harry closed his eyes and leaned in to it.

“You should know by now that I do not say something unless I mean it, brat,” he said, his voice warm.

“Well then, I suppose I’ll just have to accept it then,” Harry replied, still smiling. “But, since something like this is so rare, shouldn’t you do something about it?”

Severus drew back for a moment, not quite sure what Harry had meant. Sparkling green eyes opened and caught his gaze again before Harry smiled and leaned upwards, tilting his head and making his point known. Not quite believing that this was real and not some fevered, desperate dream, Severus leant down and pressed his lips against Harry’s.

Even though it was gentle and unhurried due to Harry’s weakened condition, Severus was amazed at the depth of feeling to the kiss. He had never experienced anything as perfect or compelling before. When they pulled apart, Severus had to fight the urge to pinch himself to test the reality of what had happened.

“Well, I must say,” Harry joked, “this is most unexpected.”

“Harry, I promise, I’m going to find something,” Severus said seriously, needing Harry to understand.

Harry merely smiled before resettling himself on his pillow. Reaching up to grasp Severus’ hand, he tiredly removed his glasses and closed his eyes, his exhaustion quickly overcoming him.

Severus stayed sitting beside him, holding his hand, until his breaths evened out and Severus was sure he was deeply asleep. Having more of a reason than ever before, Severus returned to his books with renewed vigor, determined not to lose this gift which had been laid before him.

After a few hours of looking through old, dusty, and mostly useless tomes, Severus checked to ensure that Harry was still sleeping comfortably and then left the room. It was getting late and he needed to arrange a simple dinner and the next round of potions for Harry. 

As he passed through the sitting room on the way to the kitchen, he was startled by a green flash in the fireplace and a voice breaking the stillness of the house.

“Harry? Are you there?” the voice called out and Severus turned to see Ron Weasley’s head amidst the green flames. “Oh, hello, er, Professor,” Weasley said, looking very uncomfortable.

“Hello, Mr. Weasley,” Severus said, quickly regaining his composure.

“Er, is Harry there?” he asked again before turning and mumbling to some unknown person – probably the Granger girl.

“I’m afraid Mr. Potter isn’t available for his weekly chat,” he said, not sure of how much he should impart. He knew that Harry did not want to be fawned over or smothered by the well-meaning over-attention of his two best friends.

“Is he all right?” Weasley asked, sounding a bit frantic. Suddenly, a second head squeezed next to his in the fire – Severus was amused to see that it was, in fact, Hermione Granger.

“Professor?” she asked concernedly.

“He is all right,” Severus said, tempering his words. “He had a minor setback today, but has already been seen to by the Healer. He’s sleeping, now.”

Worried faces peered at him from the fireplace and, for a moment, he considered telling them the whole story. But, when he thought of the horde of red heads that would invade Harry’s home, he thought better of it.

“Are you sure he’s all right, sir?” Granger asked him.

Severus nodded curtly. “I will inform him that you firecalled and I’m sure he will be in touch when he is better rested.”

“Thank you, sir,” she said, pulling back from the fire only to be followed a second later by a wary-looking Ron Weasley.

After the connection was broken, Severus sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and regaining his equilibrium, once again.

“Dobby,” he called, no longer feeling up to preparing dinner himself.

“Yes, Master Snape, sir?” Dobby answered, popping into the room. 

“Would you please fix some broth for Harry? He needs to take his potions shortly.”

“Of course, sir. Dobby be bringing it in a moment,” the house-elf said, popping away.

Returning to Harry’s room, he saw the young man sitting up and rubbing at his eyes. Severus took a moment to drink in the sight of him as he tried to shred the last vestiges of sleep.

“How are you feeling, Harry?” he asked, moving to sit beside him on the bed once again.

“Weak, mostly,” he answered, putting on his glasses and then smiling once he turned his eyes on Severus.

“Dobby is bringing you some broth. You should try to eat a little before you take your nightly potions.”

Harry nodded wearily, his smile faltering slightly. “And, you? How are you feeling, Severus?” he asked, meeting his eyes with a direct gaze.

“Determined,” he answered, reaching out to take Harry’s hand and squeezing it gently.

Harry looked down at their joined hands and smiled again. “So, that was real?” he asked hopefully.

“Yes,” Severus answered, “as long as you wish it to be.”

“I do,” he answered.

“Good. Your friends firecalled; I told them you were resting after having a minor setback. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Thank you,” Harry said and Severus nodded, feeling Harry squeeze his hand a little tighter.

Dobby arrived with the broth, setting the tray on the small side table by Harry’s bed. Along with the bowl for Harry, there were several ham sandwiches and some almond biscuits. Raising an inquisitive eyebrow at the house-elf, he waited for an explanation.

“Dobby will continue to follow Mister Harry Potter’s wishes to make sure you is eating, Master Snape, sir,” he said, standing up straight and glaring defiantly at Severus.

Smiling despite himself, Severus exchanged a look with Harry, seeing a matching smile appear on his face.

“Thank you, Dobby,” he said, taking up a sandwich as he handed Harry his broth. 

Dobby smiled widely – a slightly disturbing sight, in Severus’ mind – and popped away, leaving the two men to their dinner.

“Eat up, Harry,” Severus encouraged. “You’ll need your strength. I’ll not have you withering away… not now.”

Harry’s smile faded a bit, but he started eating, anyway. Severus wanted to reassure Harry in some way, but did not know how. No matter the cost, Severus was determined to find a way – any way – to save him.


	6. Chapter Six

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer.   


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To Heal a Soul

_A/N: I'd like to take this opportunity to thank all of you who have taken the time to review. It means so much to me to know that people are enjoying this fic. And, of course, thanks to rdwind for her fabulous beta skills!_

**Chapter Six**

Harry remained in bed for the next two days, too weak to do much more than sleep, take his potions, and occasionally eat, at Severus’ urging. When he finally emerged from his room on the third day, Severus was shocked at the change in him. 

Before the “Episode”, as Severus called it in his mind, Harry seemed content and spent most of his time dragging Severus into conversations and debates, drawing him from his usual reserved demeanor. Now, their roles were reversed. 

Harry was mostly silent, seeming to be a mere shadow of his former self. If Severus had been surprised at the difference in Harry when he had first arrived, he would never have recognized the creature that had now taken his place.

Settled on the settee in his normal spot, Harry sat listlessly, not meeting Severus’ eyes.

“Are you sure you’re feeling up to being out of bed, Harry?” Severus asked, working to keep his concern from turning to panic.

“Yes,” Harry answered dully.

“Well, what would you like to do?” he prodded.

“It doesn’t really matter.”

Severus sighed heavily, wishing there was more that he could do. Reaching down beside his chair, he withdrew the book that Harry had chosen previously. Harry caught sight of it and looked inquisitively at Severus.

“This is the drivel you had wanted to read next, is it not?” he asked, smirking slightly as a spark of interest appeared on Harry’s face. “So, are you going to read it?”

Harry reached out a hand to take the book and Severus was shocked to see the severe tremors wracking him. It must have shown on his face, because Harry quickly withdrew his hand, his eyes sinking to the floor.

“How bad are the tremors, Harry?” he asked softly.

Harry shrugged, but Severus saw a jerkiness to the motion that shouldn’t have been there. 

“Harry,” Severus started, not exactly sure what it was he had wanted to say.

“Don’t,” Harry said, cutting him off, “just…don’t.”

“What can I do?” Severus asked, moving to sit beside him on the settee.

Harry clenched his jaw and resolutely kept his eyes averted from Severus. “There’s nothing, Severus. We both know it.”

Severus reached over and pulled a startled Harry against his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around his body. Harry struggled for a moment, but his weakness and increasing tremors caused him to give up and sag against Severus’ body.

“I don’t know that, Harry. I refuse to know that. I have not given up, and I wish that you wouldn’t.”

“Why? Why are you doing this?” Harry demanded, his emotions finally coming to the surface.

“Because…because somehow, somewhere in the past two months, I’ve fallen in love with you,” Severus whispered, tightening his hold in fear that Harry would begin to fight against him again.

Instead of fighting, however, Harry stilled completely. Severus could feel all of his muscles tensing in his thin frame.

“You don’t mean that,” Harry whispered. “How could you…why would you?”

“I don’t know how it happened,” Severus answered, clutching Harry’s body against his chest. “But what I do know is that I refuse to just give up and let you go now that I have you.”

“You don’t have me, though,” Harry said, his voice trembling.

Severus stiffened, his heart thudding painfully at Harry’s words. “It…does not matter. Even if you were to hate me, Harry. Don’t you see? It would be enough for me just to know that you were well again.”

Harry suddenly turned into his chest, wrapping his arms around Severus’ neck tightly and sobbing into his neck. Severus held him, whispering heartfelt words to try and soothe him. Severus didn’t understand the outburst, but at the moment, he didn’t need to. 

Tremors were still wracking Harry’s body, but Severus wasn’t sure how many were true tremors and how many were the result of his sobbing. Soon, his tears trailed off and he sniffled softly against Severus’ neck. After a while, his tremors subsided somewhat, as well, and he pulled back, wiping at his cheeks and rubbing his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he said, his eyes downcast. 

“You have nothing for which to be sorry, Harry,” Severus answered, still rubbing circles on his back.

“It’s just…I was ready, before. And now…” Harry huffed in frustration and rubbed at his eyes again.

“What were you ready for?”

“I was ready to die,” he said, finally meeting Severus’ gaze. “It was certain…final. All my plans were in place and I had accepted it. I was sick and I was going to die and that was that. But then you showed up and… Damn it! I’m not ready, anymore.”

Severus eyed him warily, knowing that Harry needed to vent, but not exactly sure in what direction that venting was to take.

“I’m not ready to die, Severus. I don’t want to…not now.” Harry reached up and tentatively traced his hand along the lines of Severus’ jaw. “I never thought I would have a chance at anything with someone. I never really even thought about it…not really. No one would ever want me for me, you know?”

Severus brought his own hand up and laid it over Harry’s, squeezing it gently.

“And then you showed up on my doorstep, oozing snarkiness and scathing sarcasm…and you treated me just as you always had. You didn’t mollycoddle me because I was sick,” Harry said, a touch of amazement evident in his voice. “You just stalked right into the middle of my life and started taking over. And the next thing I knew, I was looking forward to seeing you in the morning – potions or no potions. I was happy to see you in my sitting room everyday, waiting to argue and debate with me about things that have nothing to do with my sickness or the war or…anything, really. 

“And then you kissed me,” Harry said, his eyes closed and a small smile playing on his lips, as if he were seeing that moment in his mind. “And you made it impossible for me to accept dying.”

They sat in silence for a few moments, Severus still holding Harry, still rubbing soothing circles on his back. Severus watched Harry as he sagged in on himself, tired from all of the revelations of the last few minutes. 

“Harry, what do you want?” Severus asked, knowing that, no matter what, he would try and give it to him.

“I want this, Severus. I want to explore whatever this is that is happening between us,” he said, sounding weary. “I’m just afraid that I don’t have the time to make that happen.” He opened his eyes and gazed sadly up at Severus.

“I told you, Harry, I’m not giving up,” Severus assured him.

“I know,” Harry answered, smiling that sad smile once again. “And I thank you for everything. But, I hope you’ll forgive me if I have trouble holding on to hope.”

“It’s all right. I’ll have enough hope for both of us,” Severus said, pulling him closer into an embrace. He could feel more of the slight tremors running through Harry’s body, and he cursed his own inability to find a solution.

“You should be careful, Severus,” Harry said, his tone lighter than a moment before. “If others heard you speaking so seriously of hope and love eternal…well, I daresay your reputation would be in tatters.”

Severus chuckled at Harry’s attempt to lighten the mood. “You could be right,” he said. “I shall endeavor to be more careful about where I proclaim such frivolous trivialities.”

Pulling back, Severus smoothed the hair from Harry’s forehead, happy to see that the worst of the tremors had passed and that he was looking more himself.

“You should firecall your friends,” he reminded Harry. “If you let it go much longer, I’m sure they’ll be invading and declaring war upon me for holding you prisoner.”

Harry smiled for a moment, but it faltered as he looked down at his still shaking hands. “I don’t want them to see me with these tremors. Is there something you could give me? Anything that would lessen them so that they’re not so noticeable?”

“Your friends won’t care about the tremors, Harry,” Severus assured him.

“But, it will make them worry unnecessarily. They don’t need to know how serious things are, now. You know how I feel on this subject, Severus. I don’t want them hovering and mothering me, which is exactly what they’ll do if they find out that I’ve taken a turn.”

Severus knew that it was important to Harry to handle his sickness on his own terms, and immediately began mentally cataloguing various potions that would do what Harry had asked. 

“There is one that I could brew…I have the ingredients on hand, so it should only take two hours or so. It should dampen the tremors almost completely for a few hours,” he said, glad to see Harry’s sigh of relief.

“Is this potion something I could take on a consistent basis?” Harry asked, looking hopeful.

“I’m afraid not, Harry. Over time, it would lose its efficacy if taken too often. Also, as a side effect, you could begin to lose sensation in your extremities. You would lose the ability to sense pain, heat, cold…it would be too detrimental. You might injure yourself and never know it, due to the lack of nerve responsiveness.”

Harry’s face fell, but he nodded his understanding. “Okay. But you will brew me some for today, won’t you?”

“Yes, I will,” Severus said, beginning to extricate himself from the tangle of arms and legs surrounding him. “I don’t see a problem with you taking it in moderation…say, once a week for a short firecall,” he said, bringing Harry’s smile back once again.

Harry caught his hand as he stood from the settee. “Thank you,” he said. 

Severus smiled in response and headed to his lab to brew the new potion. 

Later that night, once Harry was once again tucked into his bed, Severus turned back to his books. He had exhausted almost all of the resources he had found so far and still had found nothing that might help Harry. There were only three books remaining for him to research through. All three pulled from his collection at his home. 

These books contained some very Dark magic and rituals. Normally, he would never have even taken them from his home, for fear that they may fall into the wrong hands. Horrible things could be accomplished with some of the spells listed in those pages. However, Severus was becoming desperate.

~~~~~**~~~~~

The next few days were hell for Severus. While Harry did not experience any more seizures, the tremors continued almost unabated and the weakness and exhaustion he had been having seemed to stay no matter how many hours of sleep he obtained.

It got to the point where Harry had to ask Dobby to help him with his washing and dressing. Severus knew that Harry was mortified at needing the help. Several times, he almost stepped in and offered to help Harry, himself. But, he knew that it would only embarrass Harry further to accept that kind of personal assistance from him.

By the end of that week, Harry began forgetting things.

Severus’ heart clenched as the small lapses seemed to increase rapidly in frequency. Harry would forget whether or not he had taken his potions. Then, he would ask Severus repeatedly the same questions. If he wasn’t near a window or a clock, he would often lose track of what time of day it was.

Severus knew that it was all becoming too frustrating for Harry. All these little things that served to remind him, over and over, of how little time he had left. 

One night, as Severus was giving Harry his evening potions, Harry broke down into tears. Severus was shocked to see him become so distraught, so suddenly. Dropping down to sit beside him on the bed, he pulled Harry into his arms and rocked him, trying to soothe him enough so that he could speak about what had troubled him so much.

“It’s all right, Harry. I’m here,” he cooed, rubbing his back.

“I’m s-s-sorry,” Harry sobbed against his neck.

“Sshh, Harry. Do you want to talk about it?”

Harry pulled back and swiped at his cheeks a bit before taking the handkerchief Severus offered him. Clutching it in his shaking hands, he looked so lost.

“It’s just s-so frustrating,” he stammered. “I can’t do anything…I can’t remember anything…I just…I just wish it were over.”

Severus’ heart skipped painfully at Harry’s admission. “Is that what you really want, Harry?” he asked, knowing that no matter how much it pained him, he would do whatever it was that Harry wished.

Harry looked up at him, blinking those too-green eyes. “Sometimes, yes,” he answered without hesitation. “But, then I wake up and you’re sitting there with my potions. Or, you’re holding me through the bad tremors. Then… then I don’t want it. I just want you.”

Severus tightened his hold on Harry, his breath hitching a bit in relief. “Harry, I’m trying, I promise. I know this is so hard on you. Can you hold on…just a little longer? Please?” he pleaded.

“I can hold on if you’re here to hold me,” he said, the words muffled a bit against Severus’ shoulder. 

Harry chuckled a bit and Severus pulled back, looking at him inquisitively.

“It’s really not funny,” Harry said, shaking his head. “But, at first, when the Healers first told me that there was nothing that they could do, I thought it would be better if I lost my mind. Then I wouldn’t be able to think about what was happening…I wouldn’t have to sit here and consciously think about the fact that I was dying.

“I’ve come to the realization that losing my mind is not better. I’m scared, Severus,” he said, gripping a little tighter on Severus’ arms. “I don’t want to forget. I don’t want to lose my memories…I don’t want to forget you.”

“I know, love,” Severus said, kissing his forehead. “I’m going to do everything in my power to try and stop that from happening.”

Harry yawned widely, his exhaustion once again catching up with him. Severus laid him back gently and tucked the covers up around his body.

“Get some sleep, Harry,” he said, leaning down and pressing a light kiss to Harry’s lips.

“Severus,” Harry said, grabbing his arm to stop him from moving away just yet. “In case something happens…I…I just want you to know that I love you, too.”

Severus didn’t have the words to express what hearing that meant to him, so he simply kissed Harry again and sat with him until he fell asleep.

Retrieving the last book from his room next door, Severus sat back in the armchair next to Harry’s bed. In all of the research he had already done, the closest thing he had found to a solution would be some sort of bonding. Bonds were a sacred subject to wizards, and only performed for the most solemn and serious occasions – joining in matrimony was one example.

However, in other times, powerful wizards had been known to force bonds upon others in order to gain more power by draining it from them. In fact, Voldemort’s Dark Mark was a variation of such a bond. He was able to siphon off power from those he had marked in order to help heal himself when needed. 

All these thoughts ran through his mind as he set to reading this last book. Severus knew there was a way. Now he just had to find it.


	7. Chapter Seven

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer.   


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To Heal a Soul

_A/N: Happy Mothers’ Day to all my fellow moms out there! Sit back and relax and enjoy your day! Thanks to rdwind for the advice, support, and fabulous beta skills!_

_Warning: This chapter may require a tissue._

**Chapter Seven**

It was two o’clock in the morning and Severus could not remember ever having been more exhausted than he was at that moment. It had now been three weeks since the “Episode”…three weeks since everything started going to hell.

Harry slept almost sixteen hours a day, now, in varying increments. Since he was awake so infrequently, Severus refused to research while he was. He knew that time was running out and he wanted to spend the little time that Harry had left in his company, whether it be talking to him or simply holding him.

Severus himself was only sleeping three to four hours a night now, usually propped up in the armchair by Harry’s bed. He wanted, no, needed to be close by in case Harry needed something. All of his time, thoughts, energy was devoted to finding a way to keep Harry alive.

He almost had it.

He knew now that it was possible, theoretically, to stop the disease progression and heal Harry. It would be tricky, involving multiple steps and more than just a little danger. In order for it to be possible at all, he needed another book. The trouble was in retrieving it.

It was as he analyzed the latest stumbling block in his plan that Harry began shifting uneasily in his sleep. By the weak light of his wand’s Lumos, Severus could see that Harry had broken out into a sweat, his face much paler than it should be. Rushing to Harry’s side, he brushed his hand across Harry’s forehead, surprised to find it burning.

“Harry,” he said, trying to rouse him to full wakefulness. 

With a grunt and then a weak grown, Harry opened his eyes, blinking owlishly. “Sev?”

“I’m here, Harry. You have a fever. Here,” he said, holding a vial up to his lips, “this is a fever reducer; it should help.”

Harry choked a bit, but managed to swallow the potion. His breathing was ragged as he settled back down in the bed, and he looked up at Severus with sad eyes.

“I’m sorry, Severus,” he said in a whisper.

“What are you sorry for, love?” Severus asked, summoning a wet cloth to lay over Harry’s forehead.

“For not being strong enough,” Harry said simply. “I know how hard you’re trying, but I don’t think I’m strong enough to make it. I’m so tired.” Harry closed his eyes and Severus worried over the dark circles that were present all the time.

“You’re the strongest person I know, Harry,” Severus said, taking his hand and kissing the back of it lightly. “I know I’ve asked a lot of you these last few weeks and I know you’re tired. But, please, Harry. I think I’ve found it.”

Harry’s eyes opened with his declaration and looked up at him. “What?”

“I think I know how we can fix this,” he said, sounding surer than he really felt. But he needed Harry to hold on for just a little longer. “It’s complicated and I need to track down a book, but I think… I know it will work.”

“Tell me?” Harry requested, struggling to sit up again.

“Lie back, Harry,” Severus urged, not wanting him to exert himself. “Relax, and I’ll tell you what I’ve found.”

Severus helped Harry settle back down in bed and pulled the chair close to the bed, reaching over and grasping Harry’s hand in his own. He wasn’t completely sure how Harry would react to his plan.

“I want you to listen to everything I have to say, without interruption. I’ve researched all manner of magics, both Light and Dark, searching for something… anything that could help bring you back to health. What I believe is that with a combination of these, using magic transference and initiating a bond, we can halt the progression of the disease, stabilize your body and magical core, and then bring you back to health.”

“Magic transference? Bond? What does all this mean, Severus? What kind of Dark magic are you talking about?” Harry prodded, his trembling hand clenching a bit at the blanket.

Severus sighed. He knew he had to convince Harry that this was for the best, but it would be difficult. “Do you trust me?” he asked.

“Of course I do,” Harry answered without hesitation.

“Do you love me?”

“With all my heart.”

Severus squeezed his hand and offered him a small smile. “And I love you, Harry. Merlin knows that no seer would ever have predicted this… us… but regardless, I want a chance at a life with you. I’m willing to do anything to get that chance. Are you?”

Harry contemplated him for a moment, looking at his clasped hand and then back up into Severus’ eyes. “I want this more than I’ve ever wanted anything else, Severus.”

Letting out his breath, Severus pulled Harry’s hand up and kissed it softly. “Let me tell you what I’ve conceived then. Two weeks ago, I realized that it might be possible to boost your health and your magical core through a bond. Traditional bonds, say between a wizard and a witch who join in marriage, allow them to share their magic during times of great stress or need. 

“The tradition of bonding in marriage is fairly recent, however. Originally, bonding was used in different ways. A Ruler or Noble would often bond his servants or soldiers to him as a sign of loyalty. They would be unable to betray him once bonded. Sometimes, a darker aspect was used as well, allowing the bonder to siphon off magic from his bonded, strengthening his own.

“Voldemort’s Dark Mark was a variation on this older use of bonding. All of his followers were subjected to the bond, ensuring their absolute loyalty and devotion. When he was first returned to his body, he was actually quite weak,” he said, earning a surprised look from Harry.

“It’s true. It was not well known, however. I knew only because, as his Potions Master, I was the one to brew him Strengthening Draughts and the like. However, it was his bond with his Death Eaters that helped him achieve full power once again. 

“He healed himself, strengthened his magical core and supplemented his power by siphoning off the magic and health of his followers.” Severus felt Harry give a slight shiver and knew that it would still be difficult to convince Harry to agree to what he had in mind.

“Harry,” he said, giving him a direct gaze, “I believe that if we enacted the same type of bond, that it would provide you with the magic you need to heal yourself.”

“You…you want to mark me?” he stuttered, staring disbelievingly up at Severus.

“No, Harry. You must mark me,” Severus corrected him, watching as a look of horror crossed his features.

“I couldn’t…it’s not… No, Severus,” he pronounced breathlessly, seeming to force his words out. “I refuse to subjugate you in that way. You’ve served too many masters, and no matter the reasoning behind this, it would mean the same thing. I will not do as Voldemort had done. I cannot see you marked again,” Harry said emphatically, reaching up to caress his cheek in a way that belied the sternness of his words.

“Harry, I’ve already told you that I would do anything to save you. This is not as horrid as you think. I would wear your mark…that much is true. But in marking me, you would not become like Voldemort. He bonded others to him to rule over them and enslave them. He had dark, evil intentions when he marked others. This mark…this bonding would be done in love, Harry. That alone conquers any dark aspects in it,” Severus explained.

“But you would be forced to remain loyal to me,” Harry argued.

“Harry,” Severus said, smiling. “You already have my loyalty and so much more. This would change nothing.”

Harry was silent for a time and the only sound in the room was his ragged breathing as Severus waited for him to think over everything that he had learned. “There’s more to it than marking you, though, isn’t there?” he asked finally.

“Yes,” Severus answered, knowing that Harry would like this part no more than the last. “In order to perform the bonding, you must be strong. We would have to undergo a magic transference to build up your magical reserves to give you enough power to perform it.”

“What does that entail?” Harry asked warily.

“A potion combined with a spell which would allow us to form a temporary bond. I would then be able to transfer some of my magic to you,” he explained, somewhat vaguely.

Harry looked at him appraisingly for a moment. “What are the side effects of this transference?” he asked, and Severus cursed the fact that Harry had become more observant and cautious over the past few years.

“There is a risk that I may weaken my magical stores too greatly, which could cause magical exhaustion. As such, it could lead to coma or death if it is too severe. As for you, if your magical core is too damaged, the influx of power from the transference could prove to be too great, causing an overload of sorts, which could lead to the same results for you,” he explained clinically.

“I don’t know about this, Severus,” Harry said, raising a hand when he tried to interrupt. “I’m already dying. It’s obvious that if we do nothing, I have weeks, perhaps only days left. You, however, have a long, healthy life ahead of you. I’m not comfortable with risking your life.”

“Harry, it is mine to risk. I have risked my life for far less reward than this in the past. If this works, it would be more than worth it,” he said reassuringly. “That being said, I can no longer envision my life without you in it.”

Harry smiled at his words, a single tear escaping his eye. “I know without a doubt that I would not have a life, if not for you,” he said, reaching one trembling hand up to guide Severus’ head down to his. 

With one short, sweet, soft kiss, Severus knew that Harry would allow the attempt. Breathing a heavy sigh of relief, Severus felt exalted. He knew that they could do this and was already outlining plans for their future – something he had never done before in his life.

“Rest now, love,” Severus said, straightening the blankets around Harry’s body. “I will leave in the morning to find the book we require.”

“Will you lie with me?” Harry asked, already falling back into sleep.

“Of course,” he replied, cautiously slipping into the bed beside him, being careful not to jostle him in any way.

It wasn’t long before Severus followed Harry into sleep, dreaming peacefully while surrounded by the scent and feel of Harry beside him.

~~~~~**~~~~~

The next morning, once Harry’s potions were taken and he was once more ensconced in bed to rest, Severus traveled to the Ministry of Magic, another place he had desperately avoided since the end of the war.

Once he had made it through the checkpoint, he snarked, glared, sneered, and scowled his way to Kingsley Shacklebolt’s office. Now that Kingsley was the Head of the newly combined Auror and Magical Law Enforcement Departments, Severus knew that he was the man who could help him gain access to what he needed. 

After arguing with his secretary for a few minutes, the young, now-terrified woman hurried off to Kingsley’s office to announce him. Severus waited with barely-contained contempt for the bureaucracy at large, impatiently tapping his fingers on the secretary’s desk. After a moment, Kingsley himself emerged from the office, a large smile spreading across his face as he came to greet Severus.

“What a surprise, Severus,” he exclaimed, enveloping Severus’ hand in a crushing handshake and pulling him towards his office. Severus allowed himself to be led, smirking a bit when Kingsley shut and then warded his door before turning back to him. “Okay, then. To what do I owe this very unexpected visit?” Kingsley asked him.

“I need access to the Malfoy Library,” Severus said simply. 

Kingsley blinked slowly and then let out a bark of laughter. “You must be kidding,” he said, frowning when he saw Severus shake his head.

“For what purpose, Severus? You’ll have to give me some sort of an explanation. Those books are restricted and locked up quite tightly, as you know.”

“I need to find a book I suspect might be housed there,” Severus answered. “It’s a book on Dark Bonding and Enslavement Oaths.”

Kingsley looked at him appraisingly, the frown deepening on his face. “Again, Severus, I must ask. Why do you need this particular book?”

“For Harry Potter.”

Kingsley sputtered for a moment, losing any resemblance to his normally calm and collected appearance. “Bloody hell, Severus,” he said, collapsing into his chair, “what in the hell is going on?”

Severus sighed heavily before sinking into the chair in front of Kingsley’s desk. “Only a very few people know this… Harry has been quite ill this past year. He has been undergoing treatment for a side-effect from a curse he sustained during the final battle.”

“And because of this he needs a book on Dark Bonding and Enslavement Oaths from the Malfoy Library?” he asked incredulously.

Severus scowled darkly at the other man before continuing. “If you would let me continue,” he said with a sneer. “What only I, his Healer, and his house-elf know, is that he is perhaps only days from death.” 

Kingsley looked at him with shock and dismay at his statement. “Why doesn’t anyone know about this?”

“It was Harry’s wishes that this remain quiet,” Severus explained. “After everything he has done and been through, I think it is understandable.”

“And this book you are looking for?”

“I believe it holds the key to saving his life.”

Kingsley sat back in his chair, templing his fingers beneath his chin. “Give me an hour and I’ll be sure you have access to anything you need.”

Severus released a breath he wasn’t aware he had been holding and nodded stiffly to the other wizard. Rising from his chair, he turned back to look at the man who held the keys to Harry’s salvation.

“Thank you, Kingsley,” he said, his voice holding a rare expression of sincerity.

“When this is all over, I expect to hear quite the story on how this all came to be,” Kingsley replied, already pulling the necessary forms out of a desk drawer and inking his quill. “I’m assuming it’s an unbelievable tale.”

“You have no idea,” Severus answered. “I’ll return in an hour.”

Kingsley nodded and bent to his task.

Severus left the offices, giving one last scowl to the nervous secretary and hurried to the Apparation point, needing to return and ensure that Harry was still all right. With a little luck, he would soon have what he needed to bring Harry back to health. Smiling at the thought, he turned on the spot and Disapparated.


	8. Chapter Eight

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


* * *

****

To Heal a Soul

_A/N: That goddess of reviews, Harriverse, posed a question as to what befell the Malfoys. Originally, I hadn't planned on addressing that at all. However, that one question began a cascade of new ideas. So, thanks to the brilliant and insightful Harriverse (and my wonderful muse/beta rdwind), there are new scenes being written that will address what became of that proud, misguided family. Unfortunately, I can't divulge that information yet, as it is now pivotal to future plot points._

 _A/N #2: So, there it is. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! You all make this endeavor worthwhile. Thanks to rdwind for her continued support and suggestions. Any errors that remain are solely mine._

 

**Chapter Eight**

Eight hours. Eight bloody, infernal hours. Severus had been knee deep in the stacks of books for eight hours. He couldn’t believe it. Of course, the thick layer of dust clinging to his robes and skin went a long way in trying to convince him that it was true.

He had been ecstatic when Kingsley had first led him to the well-warded room far beneath the main floors of the Ministry. He had known that he would find the book he needed and return quickly to Harry. Oh, how wrong he had been.

He had known that the Malfoy Library was massive; he had learned that through the multiple visits with Lucius over the years. However, while ensconced in Malfoy Manor, it had been orderly – categorically so. Now, however, it appeared as though the Aurors who had seized the contents of the library did so in a slipshod, haphazard manner. Rather than maintaining the organization, they had simply piled the books indiscriminately throughout the large, cavernous room.

Severus searched through the various piles and stacks carefully, cautious to avoid the many spells, hexes, and curses which still remained on most of the dark tomes. Because of the hazardous nature of his search, he was unable to even rely on his magic to help.

Grumbling as he turned to yet another teetering stack, he remembered the day he had first laid eyes on the book that could possibly save Harry’s life.

It was more than a decade ago. Most wizards and witches had long since returned to their ordinary lives, happy to be out of the shadow of the Dark Lord. While some may have had their suspicions that he had not gone forever, most were happy to continue on in their blissful ignorance.

Lucius Malfoy had worked long and hard to rebuild his reputation and influence after the Dark Lord’s first downfall. The day that Lucius had invited Severus to the Manor, he was at the top of his powerful influence in the wizarding world. He had held positions on several governmental boards and had the ear of the top politicians. With just a word, he could have accomplished just about anything he wanted.

On that day, Lucius had been on another of his long-winded ramblings on how the Dark Lord had gone wrong. Severus had tuned most of that conversation out, having long since grown tired of his continued grandstanding and remembrances of imagined power.

However, when Lucius chanted several protection spells and then pulled an ancient looking, blood red leather-bound book from his shelves, the conversation suddenly became more interesting.

“Honestly, Severus,” he had said as he thumbed carefully through the old tome, “I can appreciate what the Dark Lord intended with that particular mark, but it would have made much more sense to have chosen something more understated. It has always been quite difficult to keep the Mark concealed, as per his wishes. It’s been an absolute nightmare while rebuilding my reputation.

“Not to mention, he could have done so much more with the powers behind the Mark. Look here,” he said, pointing to a particular paragraph. “With just a variation on the spell, he could have imbued more of his own powers into it. There are variations for communication and healing; it’s really quite extraordinary.”

Severus had leaned forward and looked at the page over which Lucius was ranting. With just a glance, Severus had known that this book, if in the wrong hands, could begin the madness and mayhem anew. It contained the history, theory, and practice involved in bonded servitude such as the Dark Lord had employed.

“Why the interest, Lucius?” Severus had asked, wondering if he should be watching him in case he decided to make a play for power.

Lucius had smirked at him then. “Never fear, Severus. I have no designs on becoming the next Dark Lord. I had actually been searching for ways to remove this atrocity. I’ll never reach the heights of power in the government I desire with this thing marring my skin.”

It had always amused Severus that someone like Lucius, who could maneuver in political circles, who had the ability to garner power politically, monetarily, and strategically, would so easily bow to another. In fact, it had been his obsession with garnering more power that had led him to the Dark Lord in the first place and, eventually, to the loss of everything he had – including his life.

Shaking off his remembrances of the past, Severus returned to his search. He was beginning to despair that he would never find the book for which he was searching. Renewing the protection spells on his hands, he turned to yet another pile.

Five books down in the stack, Severus paused, his breath catching in his throat. Sitting innocuously in the middle of the pile, hidden in the middle of innumerous stacks, buried in the vast, warded room beneath the Ministry, was the book for which he’d been searching.

The blood-red, leather-bound book was exactly as he remembered it. There was no title, no markings on the outside of the cover to identify it in any way. However, upon opening it, Severus found page after page of theory, history, and instruction on how to bind another person to oneself. Taking a moment to peruse, he found descriptions of bonds that were horrific enough in nature to make him shudder. He had never thought he’d ever be pleased to still wear the Dark Mark, but at that moment, he was grateful the Dark Lord had not chosen one of these other methods to bind his Death Eaters to him.

Closing the book and rising stiffly from his place on the floor, Severus retreated from the thrice-damned room and left word with Kingsley that he had found what he was looking for. After assuring the man that he would contact him when everything was completed, he hurriedly left the Ministry, anxious to return to his Harry.

When he arrived at the house, he was relieved to find Harry sleeping, albeit fitfully. Leaving the book in the sitting room and giving Dobby specific orders not to disturb it, he hurried off to the lab to brew the potion they would need to begin the magical transference. It was a fairly simple potion considering the powerful effects it produced. At the end of an hour, Severus was filling two vials with the vibrantly purple potion and returning to Harry’s bedside. 

“Harry,” he called softly, waking him. 

Harry blinked sleepily and looked up at Severus, a hopeful expression quickly taking over his features. “Well?” he asked weakly.

“I’ve got it. I’ve just finished the potion, so whenever you feel ready, we can begin.” 

Severus watched as apprehension filled Harry’s face, only to be chased away by the familiar expression of determination that he remembered so well.

“No time like the present, right?” Harry said as he struggled to sit up in the bed.

“Easy, Harry,” Severus replied, helping him to a more comfortable position. “Perhaps we should take a moment to review what will happen.” At Harry’s nod, he continued. “We will need to take this potion to start the process of magical transference. It will weaken the shielding around our magical cores, enabling the spell to permeate it and begin moving my power to you. It may be uncomfortable, but we must not break the connection until it is complete.”

“How will we know when it’s complete?” Harry asked, sounding concerned. “I don’t want to take too much magic and hurt you.”

“I will monitor the spell and break it at the appropriate time. You have to trust me on this, Harry,” he added when he saw the younger wizard readying to argue. “Once that is finished, you must mark me quickly while the power is at its fullest in your body.” 

Severus cast the protective spells onto both of them before reaching for and opening the book to the pertinent section. “Here is the spell you will need to bind me to you. You will likely expend most of the borrowed power in the marking, so be prepared. Once that is finished, we will both need to take a Strengthening Draught and rest for several hours before we begin to test the link to help heal you.”

Harry read over the specified paragraphs in the book and then looked up at Severus, his eyes bright. “You don’t need to do this,” he said as he reached to caress Severus’ cheek.

Leaning into the soft touch, Severus whispered, “Impertinent brat, of course I need to do this.”

Severus brought their lips together. He had been careful to hide his apprehension that this last effort would fail. There was a very good chance that something would go wrong at any of the steps they must take. Pulling back, he gazed deeply into the bright green eyes of the young man he had come to love and banished any fear or uncertainty remaining. 

“Dobby,” Severus called, only taking his eyes from Harry when the house-elf popped into the room. “Harry and I are going to begin the transference and bonding, now. I would like it if you would remain and oversee the process. If anything should go wrong, contact Healer Applewhite immediately. If the worst should happen…” he said, returning his gaze to Harry and offering a reassuring smile to belie the severity of his words. “If the worst happens, follow Harry’s standing orders. Contact anyone necessary and follow his wishes. For myself, you need only contact Headmistress McGonagall. Do you understand?”

“Dobby is understanding, Master Snape,” Dobby answered, his voice quivering. “Dobby is proud to be witnessing this great event.” The house-elf raised himself up as tall as he could manage on his small frame before bowing deeply to Severus. 

“It is time to begin, Harry,” Severus said. “We must maintain eye contact.” 

Harry nodded his understanding and reached out to hold Severus’ left hand. Raising the vials of potion to their lips, they drank down the potion, both grimacing a bit at the strong taste. Without hesitation, Severus lifted his wand and braced himself. In a strong, sure voice, he intoned, “ **Adiunctum umbilicum temporalis. Consocio potentia. *** ”

Severus gasped as he felt the spell breech his magical core and begin to siphon his magic away. It wasn’t painful, but it was very disconcerting. Struggling to maintain eye contact, he could hear Harry’s breathing increase as the power surged into his body. Harry’s eyes began to unfocus and Severus squeezed his hand, trying to ground him as his body fought to find balance. He was concerned that the influx might be too much for Harry’s weakened body.

Willing Harry to hold on for just a moment longer, he could feel his strength rapidly leaving him and knew that he would have to break the connection soon. They were both trembling from the stress, but Severus wanted to maintain the transfer for as long as possible, knowing that Harry would need the power to successfully manage the binding that would follow. 

Just as his vision began to gray at the edges, Severus cast, “Finite,” effectively ending the transference. 

Severus swayed a bit once the connection was broken and allowed Harry to steady him. Looking up and meeting his eyes once again, Severus nodded to show that he was prepared for the next step. Harry leaned in and kissed him quickly before rolling up the sleeve on his right arm. 

Taking up his wand, Harry began the rite to bind Severus to him. “Do you willingly submit and offer yourself to be bound to me?” Harry intoned, his voice now strong with the new power flowing through him.

“I do. **Attribuere ipse prolixe, *** ” Severus responded, surprised at how weak his own voice sounded.

Placing a kiss to the back of his wrist, Harry then placed his wand against Severus’ skin and replied, “I accept your offering. **Accepto decuma. Conligatio corporeum, adsero. *** ”

Severus braced himself for the pain he knew would be coming. He couldn’t help but remember the searing, wrenching pain involved when he received the Dark Mark. Instead of the expected agony, however, he felt a slight warming on his skin, beginning where Harry’s wand still rested against his wrist and expanding slowly outwards. A tingling, buzzing sensation raced up his arm and then faded quickly before a golden glow erupted from Harry’s wand. 

Harry, obviously weakened from the spell casting, collapsed in on himself and slowly leaned back on the bed, breathing heavily. Severus also felt weak and wrung out, his vision blurring and his eyes burning from fatigue. Lying down on the bed next to Harry, he called out to Dobby to bring them the Strengthening Draughts they required.

Once they had both taken the potion, Severus finally allowed himself to look down at the new mark adorning his skin. On the underside of his right arm, just above the wrist, was a long, green snake, wrapping itself around a lightning bolt. It was much smaller than the Dark Mark, and Lucius’ words from years ago echoed through his mind at the realization. 

Wearily rolling up his left sleeve, he was shocked to discover that the faded, grayed Dark Mark that had marred his skin for half his life, was gone. Staring in disbelief, he ran his hand over the now-unmarked skin. 

“Harry,” he called out weakly. “The Dark Mark is gone.”

Harry rolled his head sluggishly to the side, exhaustion evident in his features. He eyed the unblemished arm and smiled wanly at Severus before looking over at the Mark he had placed on the other arm.

“I love you, Severus,” he whispered, blinking sleepily.

“Sleep now, love,” Severus answered, wrapping himself around Harry. 

He looked over at the small house-elf that still stood guard over them. “We will need to sleep for a while, Dobby,” he said. “Watch over him, please.”

“Dobby be watching over both of you, Master Snape, sir,” he replied.

The last thing Severus saw before sleep claimed him was Dobby pulling the duvet over them and spelling the lights low. 

 

* Adiunctum umbilicum temporalis – to join centers temporarily  
* Consocio potentia – to share power  
* Attribuere ipse prolixe – to give self freely  
* Accepto decuma – to accept offer  
* Conligatio corporeum, adsero – to bind in body, to claim


	9. Chapter Nine

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


* * *

****

To Heal a Soul

_A/N: The final scene in this chapter was inspired by an idea given to me by the wonderful, talented, rdwind. If you love it, you have her to thank for it. If you don’t like it, then obviously I didn’t do a good job with her idea! Don’t forget to leave a review!_

**Chapter Nine**

Severus was slowly pulled into consciousness by a ruckus. At first, he couldn’t quite identify what the noise was. As he slowly shook off the fogginess from sleep, he realized that it was voices. Angry voices. _Why were the voices angry?_ He couldn’t seem to get his mind to function properly.

Prying open his sleep-gritty eyes, he looked around. Once he recognized his surroundings as Harry’s room, the events of the day before came flooding back to him. At the same moment, he felt a warm body pressed up behind him and an arm wrapped around his middle. Carefully turning over so as not to disturb his bed-partner, he smiled when he saw Harry still peacefully asleep. He looked slightly better than he had before they performed the rite and Severus hoped that their bond was already helping him to heal.

He was brought back to the present by a harsh shout from beyond the bedroom door. Frowning at the interruption, Severus called out for Dobby to try and determine what in the nine hells was going on. The diminutive house-elf popped into the room, looking distinctly frazzled.

“Master Snape, sir, Dobby is being so sorry,” he babbled, wringing his hands.

“Dobby, calm down,” Severus said. “Please, just tell me what is happening out there.”

“It’s Harry Potter’s Wheezy, sir,” he said, looking worriedly at the door as the shouting started up again.

“His what?”

“His Wheezy, sir,” Dobby repeated. “And the Doubles and the Wheezy’s bushy-hair. They is coming to the house even though Dobby told them not to. They isn’t listening to Dobby and they is being very loud and Dobby isn’t knowing what to do, sir.”

Severus pinched the bridge of his nose in aggravation. From the house-elf’s rambling, he assumed that Harry’s friends had invaded. He huffed indignantly at the intrusion as more shouts drifted through the door. He couldn’t imagine why they felt the need to cause such mayhem.

“Dobby, did they give any reason as to why they wouldn’t follow your instructions and stay away?”

“They said they is being worried about Mister Harry Potter, sir. They is worried when he isn’t firecalling them back when he is missing their regular meeting,” Dobby said, nervously eyeing the door.

“But, they usually speak every Wednesday night,” Severus said, feeling very confused. “Why are they so worried?”

Dobby looked warily up at the Potions Master as he tugged at his overly large purple waistcoat. “Master Snape, sir, you is being asleep for a long time and Mister Harry Potter, sir is missing his Wednesday chat.”

Severus blinked in surprise. They had performed the rite on Monday evening and, in Severus’ reckoning, they had fallen asleep for the night. He certainly didn’t feel as if he had slept longer than one night. 

“Dobby, what day is it now?” he asked.

“It is being Friday afternoon, Master Snape, sir,” the house-elf answered.

Severus gasped, completely unprepared for the knowledge that he had slept for nearly four days. “And you watched over us the whole time?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

“Of course, Master Snape, sir,” Dobby replied, standing up a bit straighter in his pride. “Dobby is taking care of Mister Harry Potter and his Master Snape. Dobby is using his magic to make sure you is both getting nourishment and getting rid of waste.”

Severus grimaced a bit with the knowledge that he had been subjected to such detailed care from the house-elf, but returned quickly to the matter at hand.

“And the Weasleys and Granger refused to stay away, I take it?”

“Yes, sir,” Dobby said, looking worried again. “Dobby is telling them that Mister Harry Potter and Master Snape sirs is sleeping, but they is refusing to stay away after the second day.”

“It’s all right, Dobby,” Severus said, hoping to keep the house-elf’s theatrics to a minimum. “You’ve done very well. I’ll go and deal with the masses, shall I?”

Dobby grinned widely, causing Severus to shudder a bit, and promised to keep to his watch of Harry. Rising from the bed, Severus grimaced at the stiffness he felt. Stretching slightly to loosen his muscles, he took up his wand and straightened his robes and hair before heaving a heavy sigh. Reluctantly, he headed for the door and the irritating lot that waited beyond.

“Something’s not right, Hermione,” the youngest male Weasley was bellowing, rather unattractively, Severus thought. “Snape’s done something to him, I know it.”

“And what is it, pray tell, do you think I have done to him?” Severus asked as he stalked into the room, pleased with the way his robes billowed out behind him. 

“Where’s Harry?” Granger asked, wisely stepping in front of her overly excited boyfriend.

“He’s sleeping, as Dobby has told you.”

“We’ve been trying to speak to him for days,” she went on, obviously not intending on backing down on her quest for knowledge.

“He, as well as I, have been sleeping for days. We entered a healing sleep after a rather exhausting treatment,” Severus explained. 

“What kind of treatment,” one of the twins asked. Severus didn’t know which one it was, and couldn’t be bothered to care.

“That is not for me to impart. When Harry awakes, he will decide what he will or will not tell you about his health.”

“But, sir,” Granger interjected, still keeping her belligerent intended at bay.

“No, Miss Granger,” Severus said, halting her inquiry. “Harry has made his wishes quite clear. I find it troublesome that after all you have gone through with him that you have so little trust in him.”

“Sir?” she asked, looking upset at the implication.

“Do you honestly believe that Harry would not have made plans to notify you if the need arose? Do you think so little of him as to believe that he would not have made the proper arrangements?” Severus asked, smirking as all four of the former Gryffindors had the intelligence to look a little abashed.

“Your inconsiderate bellowing has already roused me from my much needed rest and I would appreciate it if you would refrain from doing Harry the same injustice. Now, if you would please remove yourselves from the premises, I am sure that Harry will contact you when he is feeling up to it.”

To their credit, they all did in fact leave without further protestations. Once they had gone, Severus allowed himself a weary sigh before returning to the bedroom and a still-sleeping Harry. Taking his wand in hand again, he ran a few diagnostic scans on Harry and was happy to see that, while the already existing damage to his body had not yet begun to heal, his magical reserves seemed to be much improved. Sinking gratefully back down onto the bed, he curled himself around Harry and fell back into a pleasant doze.

The next time he awoke, it was to a grinning Harry looking down at him. 

“Hello,” Severus said, trying to shake off the last vestiges of sleep. “How are you feeling?”

“Better than I was,” Harry answered, reaching out and running a hand through Severus’ hair. “And you?”

“Relieved,” he replied, leaning into Harry’s touch. “We will need to start experimenting with our connection. It will take a bit of trial and error, I imagine, to get the right flow so as not to drain my reserves too quickly and to allow time for me to rejuvenate. Also, we must be careful not to overwhelm your system.”

“Severus,” Harry interjected, smiling softly. “Can we take a little time and just relax? I just want to lie here and be with you for a bit. Is that okay?”

Smiling in return, Severus settled back down against the pillows, happily wrapping his arms around Harry when he settled against his chest. They lay quietly together for a time, both lost in their own thoughts.

“Do you think this is really going to work?” Harry asked softly, his head nestled under Severus’ chin.

“I believe it will,” Severus answered, tightening his hold on the younger wizard. “We’ve come so far already, Harry. You have to have faith that we can make this work.”

Harry snickered softly into his neck, causing shivers to run up and down his spine. “Are you talking about making me better…or about us?” He looked up then, and Severus’ breath caught at the hopeful look in his shining eyes.

“Perhaps a bit of both, I suppose,” he answered, not able to take his eyes from Harry’s.

“Thank you,” Harry whispered, lifting his head up and bringing their lips together briefly. 

Severus gasped a bit in surprise, not expecting the repeated gratitude or the gentle kiss. Regaining his equilibrium, he bent a little lower and captured Harry’s lips again, this time drawing the kiss out. A moment later, he felt Harry’s tongue dart out and lick along his bottom lip. Granting entrance, he was awed as Harry carefully, lovingly, thoroughly explored every bit of his mouth, drawing his tongue out so that they might twine and dance together.

Never before had Severus experienced such a sweet, fulfilling kiss. When they finally parted, Severus couldn’t help but smile at the flush that had colored Harry’s cheeks. Severus met his gaze for a moment, captured, as always, by the intense green of Harry’s eyes. Leaning forward to leave a kiss upon Harry’s nose, Severus then pulled him back against his body, happy to just hold him in his arms.

~~~~~**~~~~~

“Very good, Harry,” Severus said as he felt Harry gently lessen the pull of magic from his body.

It had been two weeks since the bonding and they were finally beginning to see some improvement in Harry’s health. Each day they had spent increasing amounts of time exploring the connection between them, learning how to control the flow of magic from Severus into Harry. It had truly been trial and error.

The first day, Harry’s still weakened (although slightly improved) magical core had become suffused much too quickly, causing Harry to lose consciousness and control of the connection. Luckily, Healer Applewhite had arrived just in time to both stop Dobby from destroying the house in his panic and to dampen the drain on Severus’ magic before he was irreparably injured from the process.

Once both men had been stabilized and Ennervated, the Healer had patiently waited for an explanation as to the strange results he had received in his diagnostic scans. So it was that Healer Applewhite became the only other person to know what had transpired between Severus and Harry. 

Amazed by the emotional and now magical connection between the two men, Healer Applewhite insisted that he be present everyday for their “sessions” to prevent any more accidental surges. True to his word, the Healer arrived each day and monitored the power transfers, assisting when necessary and taking innumerable diagnostic scans to record any changes in Harry’s health.

Severus was happy at the control Harry had achieved while directing the flow. He was able to maintain the connection for longer periods of time without draining Severus uncomfortably. This, in and of itself, was proof of the improvement to Harry’s magical core. 

They had known that it was his damaged magical core that had to be healed first. Without that, Harry would have remained unable to maintain the magical levels necessary to begin healing his body. Healer Applewhite was ebullient when showing them the results of his latest scans.

“I just can’t believe it,” he was saying, fairly vibrating in excitement. “This scan proves that the mutation has been almost entirely eradicated from your body.”

“What does that mean, exactly, for my prognosis?” Harry asked, sweating slightly as his body adjusted to the newest influx of power from Severus.

“It means that this crazy stunt of yours actually worked,” he exclaimed, slapping Severus on the shoulder in an odd show of camaraderie. 

Severus had a stray thought that if this Healer hadn’t been responsible for Harry’s health for so long, that he would have enjoyed painfully removing that hand from the Healer’s body. But, circumstances being what they were, and since they had finally received the piece of news that they had been praying for, Severus overlooked the oversight. He also grabbed the large man up in a bear hug and swung him around the room. This had the added benefit of making Harry laugh.

“Now that the mutation is gone, or nearly so, Harry’s body will be able to respond to normal healing practices for his damaged organs and systems,” the Healer explained as he tried to catch his breath after his impromptu ride.

Severus was grinning madly, but he couldn’t seem to care enough to stop such an unseemly display. Harry…his Harry…was going to be all right. Looking over and seeing Harry’s joyful gaze on him, he hurried across the room and took the smaller wizard up into a crushing embrace, not minding the tears of happiness that were gathering in his eyes. After all, he saw a matching moistness in Harry’s eyes.

“We did it, love,” he said, nuzzling into Harry’s neck.

Pulling back, Harry brought one hand up and caressed Severus’ cheek. “No…you did it. You saved me, just like you said you would.” Harry leaned up and captured Severus’ lips in a deep, emotion-filled kiss. 

Severus would have been happy to live in that moment, that kiss, forever. However, they were soon brought back to the present by the sound of someone clearing a throat. Looking up unashamedly, Severus saw that Healer Applewhite was still in the room…and more than a little embarrassed by the display.

“Well, er…I mean…I would recommend that you continue the, er, magical transfers over the next couple of days,” the Healer said, stumbling over his words as he tried to avoid looking at the two men. “I’m just a firecall away if you should need me. I’ll just…that is to say…I’ll be back in two days to go over the new treatment regimen. Get plenty of rest.”

The Healer backed out of the room, still looking terribly uncomfortable. Severus couldn’t help but chuckle at the scene. Looking back at Harry, he was in awe at the look of pure happiness on his face. However, it was evident that he was exhausted after this latest transfer. Taking stock of his own body, Severus could admit that he was also quite fatigued. 

Grasping Harry’s hand, he led him into the bedroom and settled him into bed. Calling for Dobby, he had the house-elf bring them a light dinner (broth for Harry and some pasta for himself) and a very needed dose of Strengthening Draught for each of them. 

Once they had eaten, Severus sat back and watched Harry readying for bed. Although they had a long way yet to go to reach their goal of renewed health, Harry was looking so much better than he had. Severus couldn’t help but eye the way Harry’s pants hung low on his thin hips. Looking up, he found Harry staring back at him. 

“How are you feeling?” Severus asked, moving forward and embracing Harry.

“I’m tired and a bit sore,” Harry replied, stepping back and rolling his shoulders. The action caused his tee shirt to ride up a bit and Severus’ eyes became glued to the small tract of skin exposed on his midsection.

“I was just thinking the same thing,” Severus said, finally pulling his eyes back to Harry’s face. “I’m quite looking forward to a hot bath.”

“That does sound nice,” Harry responded.

“In that case, would you care to join me?”

Harry stopped dead in his tracks, looking disbelievingly up at Severus. He watched as several warring emotions flittered over Harry’s face as he thought about what Severus had proposed.

“You can’t be serious,” Harry finally said, blushing a bit in embarrassment.

“Have you ever known me to not be?” Severus countered, taking a step towards Harry.

“But…I can’t…Severus,” he pleaded, unable to voice his concerns.

Severus swept him into an embrace. “I’m not expecting anything sexual, Harry,” he reassured the younger wizard. “I know you are still very weak and not up to that sort of experience right now. I would never pressure you, Harry. I just wanted to be close to you.”

Harry trembled slightly in his arms – whether from embarrassment, fear, or desire, Severus had no idea. So, he continued to hold him, waiting for him to decide what it was he wanted.

“I just don’t want to disappoint you,” Harry whispered.

“You could never disappoint me,” he replied, meeting his lips in a soft, yet meaningful kiss. When he pulled back, Harry was smiling again. 

Grasping Severus’ hand, Harry led him into his en-suite and began drawing the bath. Disrobing first, Severus hung his robes on the back of the door and stepped into the tub, settling back to wait for Harry to be comfortable enough to join him. 

Finally, Harry removed his pants and tee shirt ungracefully, blushing the entire time. When he was naked, he stood awkwardly in the soft light of the bathroom, shifting uneasily from foot to foot.

“I’m sorry,” Harry finally whispered.

“For what, love?”

“I’m sorry that you have to see me looking like this. I know I look horrid,” he said, looking anywhere but at Severus.

“Let me explain something to you, Harry,” Severus said, reaching out to take Harry by the hand and pulling him closer. “It would never matter to me what you look like on the outside. I fell in love with who you are as a person, not with your appearance or some misguided belief as to what you should look like. To me, you are and will always be exquisite.”

Smiling widely at the reassurance, Harry stepped into the tub and settled between Severus’ legs, happily lying back against the older wizard’s chest. 

They serenely washed each other, sharing the flannel between them. Hands caressed and lips stole quick, chaste kisses as they relaxed and talked quietly. 

While Severus knew that Harry would be unable to become physically aroused because of the damage to his organs, Severus did not have such an impediment. As he slowly and lovingly ran the flannel across Harry’s body, his own began to react to the sensuality of the situation. Harry froze as he felt Severus’ erection become pronounced against his back.

“I’m sorry, Harry,” Severus said quietly, regretting his inability to control his body’s baser functions. “I shall leave you to your bath in peace. I did not mean to make you uncomfortable.”

Harry turned, so that he was now facing Severus. “I’m not uncomfortable,” he said, looking down at Severus’ hardness. “I just wish you could see how much I want you, as well. Since you can’t, I’ll just have to show you.”

Severus was about to ask him what he meant when Harry placed his hand on Severus’ chest. Meeting and holding his eyes, he slowly trailed his hand downward until it was resting over Severus’ full and throbbing erection. That first touch made it twitch and jump, and Harry wrapped his hand firmly around it. 

Gasping in surprise and pleasure, Severus let his head fall back against the side of the bathtub, forcing himself to keep his eyes open and locked with Harry’s. He began a slow, but steady stroking motion, sending waves of pleasure throughout Severus’ whole body. 

It had been far too long since Severus had indulged in pleasures of the flesh with another, and so it only took a few moments before his climax was rushing through him, surging out and covering Harry’s hand. Crying out Harry’s name as he came, he sank down in the bath, wrapping his arms around Harry as he curled up against him.

“I love you,” Harry said as Severus struggled to regain his breath. “I can’t wait to be healthy again so that I can show you how very much I do.”

“Thank you, Harry,” Severus answered, placing a kiss on Harry’s head. “I promise, when you are well, I will endeavor to show you how very much I love you…in more ways than you can imagine.”

Kissing languidly for a few moments, they finally parted, rinsing off and leaving the bathtub. That night, they curled up together in Harry’s bed, contentedly falling asleep in each other’s arms.


	10. Chapter Ten

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


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To Heal a Soul

_A/N: I am awed and humbled by the positive response to this story. Thank you to all the wonderful readers who continue to leave me such lovely reviews! And my undying and eternal gratitude to rdwind for being my sounding board, my muse, and my friend while not cursing me for my repeated, annoying structural errors._

**Chapter Ten**

“But why do I have to go to St. Mungo’s for the treatments?” Harry was asking the Healer. 

Now that the scans were showing that the mutation had been completely eradicated, Healer Applewhite was ready to start healing the extensive damage to Harry’s organs and systems. Severus didn’t quite understand Harry’s reluctance to undergo this final step to reach his full health once again, but he was determined to find out.

“Harry,” he said soothingly, reaching out and taking his hand, “Healer Applewhite already explained that the healing will be far too extensive to try and undergo on an outpatient basis. I’ll be with you the whole time, I promise.”

“It should be no more than two weeks, Harry,” the Healer assured him. “I will need to bring in and consult with other healers to ensure that we are completely successful.”

“We?” Harry interjected forcefully, obviously not caring whose feelings he hurt. “ _We_ didn’t do anything. Severus did. _We_ already had my funeral planned. And I don’t want any other healers involved. I don’t want a lot of people in on this…that has always been my main concern, you know that.”

“Harry, please listen to what Healer Applewhite is saying,” Severus implored, surprised at his outburst.

“I understand your concerns, Harry,” the Healer said. “However, I am not qualified to treat some of the injuries you have. For instance, the neurological damage you have sustained will require very specialized care to properly reverse any permanent impairments. I have the perfect person to bring in to consult on that…I really think you’ll like her.”

“What is it that is really troubling you, Harry?” Severus asked.

Harry was visibly beginning to panic and Severus was frantically trying to calm him. He had experienced a marked improvement in his condition, but he still had a long way to go and this stress was not helping. Just as Severus was about to suggest that Harry go and lie down for a few minutes, all hell broke loose.

Harry’s skin suddenly turned ashy and his eyes rolled back in his head as he fell off the settee on which he had been sitting. He was trembling wildly and his breath was coming in hitching gasps. Healer Applewhite swore loudly and leapt over the coffee table, quickly reaching Harry and turning him onto his side. 

Severus felt helpless as he watched Harry become violently sick amidst the seizure-like shaking. Once he had completely emptied the contents of his stomach, the Healer banished the mess and began running diagnostic scans rapidly, trying to ascertain the cause of the fit.

“Severus, I need a Calming Draught… if you don’t have one, get me Dreamless Sleep. I need to force him to relax before he goes into a true seizure.”

Running out of the room before the Healer had even stopped speaking, Severus grabbed the Calming Draught and a muscle relaxant on impulse and hurried back to the sitting room. Eyeing the potions, the Healer nodded approvingly and slowly coaxed Harry into taking both potions. As the violent trembling stopped and Harry’s breath evened out, Severus noticed that he had been holding his breath and let it out in a wild rush. Healer Applewhite settled Harry’s now relaxed body back onto the settee before turning back to Severus.

“What happened?” Severus asked, unable to take his eyes off of Harry’s prone form.

“It seems to have been a severe panic attack. His body was affected so much more because he is still so weak,” the Healer explained. “Do you know why the thought of going to St. Mungo’s is bothering him so much?”

“No,” he answered. “But I’m going to find out.”

Healer Applewhite nodded and took his leave, reminding Severus that, as always, he was just a firecall away.

Taking up a seat next to the settee, Severus kept watch over Harry as he slept off the effects of the potions. As he waited, he started going over in his mind all of the conversations he had had with Harry of late. There must have been some indication, some clue, as to why he was so upset at the mention of going to St. Mungo’s. 

After an hour, Severus was no closer to finding an answer, but Harry was beginning to rouse from his exhausted slumber. He slowly blinked awake, looking around dazedly at his surroundings.

“Severus?” he asked. “What happened?”

“You had a panic attack and lost consciousness. Healer Applewhite had to medicate you to relax your body before you could further damage yourself,” he explained, taking Harry’s hand. “Is there something you wish to talk to me about, Harry?”

Looking sheepish, Harry’s eyes darted around the room briefly, as if looking for an answer. Severus reached out and gently grasped his chin, directing his gaze back.

“Harry, there is nothing you cannot tell me; you know that, right?” 

To Severus’ shock, Harry started to cry softly, hiding his face in his hands.

“Oh, Merlin…Harry, what is it?” Severus asked, pulling his hands away from his tear-streaked face.

“There’s just so much,” Harry sobbed, wiping furiously at his cheeks. “What if they can’t fix it? What if all of this was for nothing?”

“They’re going to make you healthy again, love,” Severus assured him, pulling him into an embrace and rocking him gently. “They’re going to fix everything and you’re going to be just fine. Remember, you have me and my magic to help you now, too.”

Harry nestled himself against Severus’ chest, resting his head beneath his chin. “I just wish I was as sure of all this as you are.”

“Harry, look at me,” he prompted, turning his face up to meet his eyes. “I promised you that I would find a way, didn’t I?”

“Yes.”

“I found a way to save you and nothing, and I mean NOTHING, will stop you from becoming completely healthy again, all right?”

Harry offered him a watery smile and snuggled back against his chest. Severus rubbed soothing circles on his back as he continued to hold the smaller wizard.

“Is there anything else that is worrying you?” he asked.

Sighing deeply, Harry nodded. “If I have to be at St. Mungo’s for so long, people are going to find out.”

“St. Mungo’s won’t tell anyone you’re there. I can ask Kingsley to provide some guards if it makes you feel better. I promise that the press won’t get anywhere near you.”

“It’s not the press that I’m worried about,” Harry mumbled.

Severus paused in his rocking for a moment, puzzled. “Then who are you worried about?”

“My friends,” he answered softly.

“Why on earth wouldn’t you want your friends to know that you’re better?” he asked, completely confused by the turn in conversation.

Harry was silent for a few moments, and Severus waited patiently. Something was obviously troubling Harry greatly and it wouldn’t do to try to rush him. If there was one thing Severus had learned about Harry over the years, it was that he would always explain himself, but in his own time.

“I’m worried about how they’ll react to us,” he finally answered, his voice barely audible.

Severus tensed a bit, this latest confession striking him painfully. “Are you ashamed to be publicly involved with me?” he asked, just as quietly.

“Merlin, no!” Harry answered quickly, looking up and meeting Severus’ gaze. “I could never be ashamed of my feelings for you. How could I after all you’ve done for me? For everyone? I love you, Severus. Nothing and certainly no one’s opinion could change that!”

Sighing in relief, Severus settled Harry back against his chest again. “Then what is it?”

“Once they find out that I’m getting well, there will be a lot of questions. After all, I was as good as dead. All the best healers had pronounced that there was nothing to be done. How do we explain?”

“We tell them the truth, Harry,” Severus said, finally beginning to understand.

“How?” Harry demanded, starting to become agitated again.

“Harry, you need to remain calm. You’ve already collapsed once today from stress.”

“I’m sorry,” he answered, taking a couple of deep breaths before settling back down. “I’m just afraid of how they’ll all react when they find out I used a Dark Bonding Ritual on you to siphon off your magic. I’m worried that they’ll hate me or start being afraid of me.”

“They’re your friends,” Severus reminded him. “They’ve gone through too much with you and for you over the years to abandon you over this. They might be upset or concerned at first, but they’ll understand.”

“I hope you’re right.”

“Have I been wrong about any of this yet?” Severus asked.

“No,” Harry answered with a soft chuckle. “I guess I should remember who it is that I’m dealing with.”

“That you should,” Severus agreed, getting another chuckle from Harry. “But for now, you need to eat something and then rest. We need to be at St. Mungo’s very early tomorrow morning to start your treatment.”

“Do you promise that you’ll stay with me the whole time?” Harry asked, casting a worried look to Severus.

“With all that I am,” Severus replied.

“I’m holding you to that, you know.”

“I would expect nothing less from you, brat.”

~~~~~**~~~~~

“And this, Harry, is Healer Laura Lee. She’s the Chief Healer on the Janice Thickey Long Term Ward.”

Healer Applewhite was going around the room and pointing to various wizards and witches, all dressed in the standard lime-green robes of St. Mungo’s. Severus was paying close attention to the various names and specialties, needing to know who to hex if they should fail to heal any part of Harry.

“Healer Lee has made great strides in dealing with maladies of the neurological system, both curse-inflicted and natural,” Healer Applewhite continued. Harry shook her hand, as he had every other Healer. 

“Now, as I was explaining to you, Harry,” Healer Applewhite said, “we’ll be working on one system at a time, so as not to tax your body. We’ll start with the genitourinary system and get those kidneys functioning. From there we’ll move on to your gastrointestinal system. Once we get the pipes working, so to speak, we’ll be able to begin work on your digestive system. Hopefully, by the end of this first week, we’ll have you eating and eliminating normally again.”

Severus watched as Harry’s expression turned hopeful. He knew that one of the main things Harry had been missing was being able to eat his favorite foods.

“That sounds good,” Harry said, smiling at the group.

“So, while I’ll be overseeing this little project,” Healer Applewhite said with a grin, “you’ll be spending most of your time with Healers Smythe, Baddock and Miles this week. Do you have any questions?”

Harry looked nervously over at Severus, but visibly relaxed at Severus’ reassuring smile. “No, I don’t think so,” he answered.

“Wonderful,” Healer Applewhite said, clapping his hands excitedly. “Now, we’ll just need you to fill out these forms and then we’ll get you situated in your room.”

The various Healers filed out of the room, leaving only Harry, Severus, Healer Applewhite, and a very large stack of medical forms. Harry groaned a bit as he picked up the first parchment, causing the other two wizards to chuckle.

“It’s really not all that bad, Harry,” the Healer said. “I’m sure Severus here will be happy to help with some of those.” 

Severus shot the Healer one of his patented glares, but it had no effect on the jolly man. Apparently, he had realized that, when it came to Harry, Severus would do anything…even fill out innumerable forms in triplicate.

“Before you get too deeply into those forms, I wanted to speak to you both for a moment,” the Healer said, drawing their attention.

“What is it?” Severus asked, making sure to maintain his calm and collected expression for Harry’s sake. 

“It’s nothing negative, I promise,” he said, obviously picking up on the others’ nervousness. “I just wanted to let you know that I’ve arranged for you to be able to stay in Harry’s room,” he told Severus. “I’ve given a rough overview to the other Healers involved with Harry’s case. No specifics, don’t worry,” he said when Harry was about to interrupt. “Just that you both have initiated a bond which will require you to remain in close proximity.”

Severus arched an eyebrow at the Healer, impressed with the Slytherin deception. “And this didn’t raise additional questions?” he asked.

“Now, Severus,” the Healer answered with a smirk. “Do you think I could have gotten so far and been assigned to such high-profile and dire cases such as Harry’s without having the ability to misdirect attention when required?”

Severus inclined his head in response before turning back to Harry and picking up a number of forms to complete.

“Well, brat,” Severus said warmly, as the Healer left them to their work. “It would appear as though we are both in good hands.”

Harry smiled widely and then bent over his own mini-stack of forms. A moment later, however, Severus felt Harry take his hand and squeeze it. Looking over to Harry, he was met by another smile.

“Thank you, Severus,” Harry said.

“For what?”

“For what?” Harry repeated, his smile growing wider. “Oh…for being you, for not giving up, for knowing exactly what I need and when I need it…for a million things, really,” he said.

Severus leaned in and kissed Harry gently, relishing that he had the opportunity to do so.

“In that case, I suppose I should thank you, as well,” he said.

“And what are you thanking me for?” Harry asked playfully.

“For allowing me to do all of those million things,” he replied.

They shared a warm look for a moment longer before returning to the drudgery of the forms. Even the obscene nature of the vast amount of bureaucratic red tape couldn’t dampen Severus’ spirits. He couldn’t be anything less than perfectly content, sitting in the small, dreary hospital room, with Harry’s hand resting comfortably on his leg as their quills scratched away.


	11. Chapter Eleven

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


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To Heal a Soul

_A/N: Thanks to all the wonderful, wonderful readers who have taken the time to leave a review and tell me what they think! And thanks to rdwind for just being so darn fabulous!_

**Chapter Eleven**

Severus was smiling. Yes, it was unexpected…perhaps even unseemly. But, he didn’t care. 

Harry had been at hospital for a week, and Severus had just gotten approval from his healers to arrange a very special dinner for him. For months, Harry had been forced to eat only soft, bland foods. Tonight, he would be feasting on all of his favorites.

Severus had left Harry for a few hours, arranging this special dinner with Dobby. In his hands, he carried a tray with roast beef, Yorkshire pudding, roast potatoes, mushy peas, and a large serving of treacle tart for afters. He couldn’t wait to see the look on Harry’s face.

Leaving the tray just outside the room, Severus gently opened the door and peeked around the edge. Harry was propped up in bed, writing away in his journal. It was a new routine Harry had started, once they learned that he was going to live. He had decided to start recording his thoughts and experiences so that when, eventually, far in the future, he did die, he could leave a more accurate accounting of his life. Severus supported him whole-heartedly, knowing that it was a way for him to focus on and deal with the troubling events he had experienced.

Clearing his throat, Severus made himself known. Harry looked up and smiled brightly, marking his page and closing his journal before putting it on the bedside table.

“Hi! Where have you been hiding all afternoon?” Harry asked.

“I had a few errands to see to,” Severus replied, moving to sit beside Harry on the edge of the bed. “Why, did you miss me?”

“Of course I did,” Harry answered, leaning up and kissing him. “I met with the healers again today after my treatment."

“And what did they have to say?”

“Healer Applewhite is very impressed with how quickly my body is reacting. He says that they’ll be able to speed up the next set of treatments and I might be able to get out of here sooner than anticipated.”

“That’s wonderful, Harry,” Severus said, smiling at the good news. “You’re feeling well, then?”

“I feel amazing, Severus,” Harry replied. “Healer Lee thinks that I’ll be tremor-free by the end of the weekend. She also said that the damage that was causing my memory loss was much less extensive than she originally thought. Hopefully, I be finished with the last of my treatments by Monday.”

Severus grabbed Harry up in a tight embrace, unable to hold back his emotions any longer. “I’m so happy for you, love,” he said, his voice trembling slightly.

“Be happy for both of us,” Harry whispered into the side of his neck. 

Pulling back, Severus brought his hand up to caress Harry’s cheek, reveling in the healthy flush residing there. “I have a surprise for you,” he said, rising from his seat.

“What is it?” Harry asked, fairly bouncing on the bed in anticipation. 

Severus chuckled at his excitement. Grabbing up the tray from its spot outside the door, he brought it over to the table next to Harry’s bed. “I spoke with your healers today, as well. They informed me that your digestive tract is completely healed and that you can resume a normal diet. I took the liberty of arranging a little something special for you.”

With a flourish, Severus removed the cover from the tray and placed it on Harry’s lap. Watching the emotions play over his face, Severus was thrilled at the way Harry practically drooled at the sight of all his favorite foods.

“I can’t believe you did this,” he said. “How did you know what to bring me?”

“Dobby was a great help, as always,” Severus replied. Harry’s stomach chose that moment to rumble loudly, causing Harry to blush and Severus to laugh outright. “I think you should hurry up and feed yourself before your healthy digestive system decides to rebel.”

Harry laughed and picked up his fork, pausing for a moment as if considering where to begin. Severus happily sat back and watched as he decimated every scrap of food on the tray. He had never imagined feeling such joy at watching such horrible table manners.

Finally, when the last bits of treacle tart had disappeared, Harry sat back against his pillows and groaned, rubbing his stomach. “I don’t think I’ve ever eaten so much in one sitting before.”

“I agree. However, you should expect plenty more meals like this one. You have quite a bit of work to do to regain the weight you have lost,” Severus said, removing the tray and retaking his spot on the bed.

“Thank you, Severus. That was a wonderful surprise.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it, brat,” Severus said, running his hand through his healthy, thick, unruly hair.

Harry pulled Severus down, making room for him in the small hospital bed. Once Severus was settled as comfortably as possible, Harry curled up against him, resting his head on his chest. Severus imagined that, if Harry were a cat, he’d be purring wildly by now.

“Did I miss anything else while I was away today?” Severus asked, wanting to stay up to date on everything that transpired in Harry’s treatments.

Harry burrowed his head into Severus’ shirt. “There was one other thing that happened,” he mumbled against the fabric. 

“What is that, love?” Severus inquired. Harry mumbled something quickly and quietly into Severus’ chest. Chuckling, Severus lifted Harry’s face by his chin, noting the bright red blush on his cheeks. “Sorry, I didn’t quite hear what you said.”

“I got an erection today,” he said, growing impossibly more flushed. “Healer Smythe had told me that everything should be functioning normally again, so after he left I…I tried wanking.”

Severus was torn. Part of him wanted to chuckle at the obvious embarrassment Harry was feeling at this conversation. However, the majority of him wanted to test the healer’s prognosis for himself. “You need not be embarrassed,” Severus said, leaning in to kiss him softly. “So, you attempted to pleasure yourself?” Harry nodded, still blushing a little. “And how did that go?”

Harry’s cheeks reddened even more, but the lustful expression that came across his face just then was more than enough answer for Severus. 

“Can you lock the door?” Harry whispered. 

Severus immediately reached for his wand, casting locking and silencing spells in rapid succession. Before he had even placed his wand down on the table, Harry had straddled his waist, pushing his body down against the bed. Severus could feel the evidence of Harry’s arousal through the thin cotton of his hospital pyjamas. Groaning, he grasped the back of Harry’s neck and pulled him down for a demanding kiss.

There was a small voice in the back of Severus’ head urging him to be gentle; to slow down and be careful since Harry was still recovering. That voice was quickly bludgeoned to death when Harry moaned into his mouth and ground their hips together.

Moving his hands down Harry’s back, he let them slide around his twin mounds, cupping and squeezing them while pulling their groins into contact. Harry pulled back from the kiss and swore loudly, immediately dropping his head down and moving his lips to Severus’ neck.

Severus saw stars as Harry began licking, sucking and biting his neck. He knew Harry would leave a mark behind, and the thought of being marked once again by Harry caused his cock to jump painfully against the confines of his trousers. 

They began a heated rhythm of thrusting and moving against each other, faster and faster, each trying to increase the friction and contact to ease the pain and increase the pleasure of their arousal. Severus had a brief thought that he had never felt so alivelostneedyloved when suddenly, Harry threw his head back, crying out as he reached his completion. Severus watched, dazed, as Harry’s eyes unfocused and his breath wheezed in and out of his body. Witnessing such beauty and perfection was all the catalyst Severus needed and he too spiraled out, arching his back as his orgasm roared through his body. 

Collapsing back, Severus was barely aware of the added weight of Harry’s body pressing against his. It was several minutes before the first semblance of coherency returned to Severus. Opening his eyes, he was met with the pure, emerald green of Harry’s. Joining together for a slow, deep kiss, Severus felt more joy and peacefulness than he had ever before experienced. 

He silently Accio’ed his wand and performed a Cleansing Charm to remove the evidence of their coupling. Feeling comfortable and sated, he wrapped his arms around Harry, happy to continue playing the part of pillow.

“Are you all right?” Harry asked softly a few minutes later.

“I am better than I have ever been,” Severus answered, placing a kiss on the top of his head. “And you?”

Harry sighed contentedly, raising his head to place another soft kiss against Severus’ lips. “I’m brilliant.”

Severus chuckled, rolling onto his side so that they could face each other while they talked. “I take it that you are happy your systems are ‘functioning normally’?”

Harry blushed slightly, but smiled. “Don’t tease,” he admonished. “Of course I’m happy. I feel as though I’ve been waiting forever to share this with you.”

Severus placed a kiss on the tip of Harry’s nose. “I look forward to even more sharing as soon as you are released from hospital.” He watched as a glimmer of lust sparked in Harry’s eyes, before being replaced with something else. “Is something troubling you, Harry?”

“It’s just…I’m not very experienced, you know,” Harry said, his blush returning as he hid his face again.

“I have told you before, Harry, I will never pressure you in any way. I would be happy to simply share kisses and hold your hand,” he said, grasping Harry’s hand in his own. “Your experience…your past…has no bearing on our relationship. All right?”

Harry looked up, relief visible in his expression. “Thank you, Severus. You’ve been so wonderful…I just don’t have the words to express how much it all means to me.”

“I think you have expressed yourself fairly well today, brat,” Severus teased. “Now, why don’t you try and get some rest.” 

“Will you stay here with me?”

“Nothing could move me from this spot,” Severus said with a smile. Reaching for his wand, he removed the silencing and locking charms before settling into a more comfortable position.

Harry smiled back and closed his eyes, fatigue quickly overcoming him. Severus watched as he fell asleep, thanking whatever deities were listening for giving him this chance with Harry. Before long, Severus also gave in to the call of sleep.

~~~~~**~~~~~

“ **What in the bloody hell is this?** ”

Severus bolted awake at the bellow, feeling Harry jerk awake as well. Even before his senses had kicked in, his instincts had him grabbing up his wand and pointing it at the source of the commotion.

There, in all his ginger glory, was Ronald Weasley. His face was even redder than his hair as he took in the sight of Harry and Severus in bed, wrapped around each other.

“Mr. Weasley,” Severus said by way of greeting, lowering his wand. “I assume you would like to visit with Harry.”

“Damn right,” he answered, his hands clenching tightly as he visibly struggled to remain in control.

He felt Harry tense beside him and knew in an instant that Harry was not prepared to go through this discussion alone. “I trust you won’t mind if I remain,” Severus said, noticing Harry relax perceptively. “He is still undergoing treatment and it would not do for him to become overly excited.”

For a moment, Weasley looked as if he were torn with indecision. Finally, reluctantly, he nodded sharply, coming completely into the room and closing the door behind him. Severus grudgingly removed himself from the bed, but sat in the chair closest to the bed, not wanting to put too much distance between himself and Harry.

“How did you know I was here, Ron?” Harry asked.

“Dobby told me,” he answered, looking a little guilty.

“What in the hell did you do to him?” Harry raged suddenly, surprising both of the other men.

“I didn’t do anything to him…not really,” Weasley stammered. “I just threatened him a bit, that’s all.”

“How could you do that? After everything that Dobby has done for all of us over the years…it’s inconceivable that you would treat him so horribly! You should know by now that if I want you to know where I am or what I’m doing that I will let you know myself.”

“I’m sorry, Harry. We’ve just all been so worried, lately. You’ve been so secretive. You started missing our weekly chats…Snape starts making all sorts of excuses for you…then I find out you’re in hospital and you didn’t even let us know?” Ron said, his voice becoming louder as he ranted.

“Mr. Weasley,” Severus said, standing to place himself in front of Harry. “I would suggest you lower your voice and try to control yourself before I have you removed from this room.”

Taking several deep breaths, Weasley visibly reined in his emotions. “I’m sorry for yelling, Harry,” he said. “But, please…we’re all so concerned about you. Are you getting worse? Can’t you tell me what’s going on?”

Harry glanced over to Severus for a moment, trepidation clearly evident on his face. Severus reached out and grasped his hand in support, offering a smile, which had the added benefit of dragging a shocked gasp from Weasley.

“I’ve been undergoing some special treatments this week, Ron,” Harry began explaining. “I didn’t want to tell anyone ahead of time because I wasn’t sure what was going to happen. I’ll be leaving hospital in a few days. Once I’m home, I’ll firecall you and set up a time when everyone can come to my home and I’ll explain everything. But,” he said as Weasley tried to interrupt. “I’m only going to tell it once.”

Weasley sighed resignedly and nodded his acceptance. He cast a few wary looks at Severus and their clasped hands before looking back at Harry. “Will you at least explain to me what all this is about?” he asked, gesturing toward their hands.

Harry looked over at Severus again, and Severus was floored with how much love was shining in his eyes. “There’s really not much to explain, Ron. He came to help me and we fell in love. End of story.”

“Bloody buggering hell,” Weasley muttered under his breath. “Are you happy, Harry?”

“More than ever,” he replied, his voice stronger than it had been since the curse had ravaged his body, his eyes never leaving Severus’ face.

Weasley wearily rubbed his hand across his face. “Well, then I guess there’s nothing more to discuss on the matter. I guess I’ll be heading back to let Hermione know you’ll be in touch in a few days, then.”

“I promise that I’ll explain everything, Ron. Just give me a few more days, all right?”

“All right, mate. If you need anything, though, please call us. We’re still your best friends, and we want to be there for you, too.”

“I know, Ron. Thanks.”

Finally, Weasley left and Harry sagged back onto the bed, looking worried. “This is going to be hell, Severus,” he said. 

“We’ve already come through hell,” Severus replied, returning to his place alongside Harry. “Anything else is going to be easy after all that.”

“I suppose,” Harry said, nuzzling against Severus’ side. “As long as you’re with me, I can face it.”

“Then you have nothing to worry about, love.”


	12. Chapter Twelve

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


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To Heal a Soul

_A/N: Thanks to all of the reviewers who make me smile, blush, and think about what it is I've written! You all are wonderful! And, of course, thanks to rdwind for helping me craft this world._

**Chapter Twelve**

Severus had never seen Harry so nervous. He flitted about the room, fidgeting and looking as if he were seconds away from a full-blown panic attack.

He had been released from hospital two days before and had immediately made plans for the “big announcement”. He had invited several members of the Weasley family, Longbottom, and the Lovegood girl (for what reason, Severus had no idea). Severus had asked that Minerva McGonagall and Kingsley Shacklebolt also be present. Harry had seemed fine about the upcoming meeting, being just slightly anxious…up until that morning. Now that his house was about to be besieged with loved ones, however, Severus was concerned that Harry was nearing the breaking point.

“Harry, please, come sit down. Wearing a hole in your floor with your pacing will not help matters,” Severus said, hoping to get Harry to calm before their guests arrived. “Everyone will arrive, you will tell them what has happened, and the rest is up to them, love.”

Harry huffed out a sigh, but went to sit on the settee next to Severus. Resting his head on Severus’ shoulder, he burrowed as closely as possible into the other wizard’s side. 

“Tell me it’ll all be all right, Severus,” he said in a pleading tone.

“Would that I could, Harry,” Severus replied. “All we can do is present the facts to them and hope that they will see our actions for what they were.”

A few moments later, the fireplace flared to life and the first of the Weasley clan came stumbling out. One after the other, Severus watched with growing displeasure as seemingly innumerable redheaded irritants crowded about the room. Arthur and Molly were, of course, in attendance, along with both twins. Ronald brought up the rear, pulling an especially frazzled looking Hermione Granger behind him.

Harry spent a few moments greeting everyone, accepting hugs, kisses, and many compliments as to his healthy appearance. Smiling nervously and looking completely uncomfortable, Harry eventually extricated himself from the throng and rejoined Severus, taking hold of his hand for some much needed support.

Dobby soon arrived, ushering in both Longbottom and Lovegood, who had arrived at the front door. Severus was not surprised to see that Lovegood still appeared to be otherwise detained in some alternate universe, her expression still just as dreamy and otherworldly as it had been in school. Longbottom, on the other hand, seemed to have grown several inches and found some fount of confidence, if his new carriage and demeanor were anything to go by.

Just as the clock struck three, Minerva and Kingsley arrived together, forever slaves to punctuality. 

Dobby darted about the room, serving tea and biscuits to whomever wanted them. Finally, everyone was settled and looking expectantly at Harry. With a comforting squeeze to his hand, Severus urged him to begin.

“I’m glad you could all come,” he said, smiling nervously and biting at his bottom lip. “I guess you all have been wondering what has been happening with me lately.”

Of course, the Granger bint couldn’t keep quiet and chose that moment to begin haranguing Harry, much to Severus’ chagrin. “We’ve hardly spoken for several weeks, Harry,” she said in an irritatingly mothering tone. “We’ve all been worried sick that you had taken a turn for the worse, but you look so well…what exactly were these latest treatments for?”

“I know you’ve been worried, Hermione, and I’m sorry for that. But there was a reason and I’m going to tell you all of it, all right?” There were several nods of acceptance from the people situated around the room. 

“As you know, at Minerva’s request, Severus came to brew my many needed potions. At the time of his first visit to me, the Healer had given me only a few weeks more to live, two months at most.” He stopped as several gasps of surprise were heard. “For some unknown reason, Severus decided to take on the task, regardless. After only a week, my health had improved and the progression of the illness had almost completely halted.

“As you can imagine, we spent a great deal of time together, since he had to move in here to be able to have continuous access to me to provide the proper potions. Somewhere along the way, we realized that we had developed feelings for each other.”

“Harry,” Molly cried out suddenly. “Are you saying that you really are involved with Severus? Ron had said...but I didn't think...”

“Yes,” he answered, turning to give Severus a brilliant smile. “We’re involved…we are also in love. I need you all to understand that, as it has a lot to do with the rest of what I have to say.”

Severus looked around the room and saw grudging acceptance from the other two-thirds of the Golden Trio, disbelief from the twins, and something akin to horror on Longbottom’s face. Lovegood looked as oblivious as always, but both Minerva and Kingsley had knowing smiles on their faces. Looking over at the closest thing Harry had ever had to parents, however, he saw both wearing disapproving expressions. Sighing heavily, Severus knew that things could only get worse.

“After two months of Severus’ potions, everything seemed to be going very well. Then, I had a massive seizure. The healer said that it was a sign of worsening neurological damage and that our good luck had run its course. The prognosis wasn’t good and he was afraid I would only have a few weeks before my organs began shutting down. 

“That’s when Severus decided that he was going to save me.”

Minerva looked up at Severus, making the first connection. “Did you find what you needed from the Hogwarts Library, Severus? Is Harry truly cured?”

Severus looked over at Harry, silently asking if he wanted him to take over. With a slight nod from Harry, Severus turned back to Minerva. “I suppose that’s the main reason Harry invited you all here today. It took a lot of research, but I managed to find a way to give Harry the resources he needed to stop the disease progression and allow the healers at St. Mungo’s to repair the extensive damage to his body,” Severus said, taking in the stunned expressions of everyone in the room.

“It’s true, then?” Molly asked, tears forming in her eyes. “You’re going to be all right?”

“Yes,” Harry answered. “Severus did it. He did what no one else could do. St. Mungo’s has given me a clean bill of health.”

There was a stunned silence for all of three seconds before chaos exploded across the room. Screams and shouts of joy filled the air as several people all jumped up at once, trying to get to Harry to embrace him, shake his hand, and even lift him off the ground in celebration. For a brief moment, Severus thought that perhaps they had escaped having to explain the specifics of what they had done to achieve this. 

Then, Granger opened her mouth. “But, how did you do it, Professor?” she asked. 

Silence immediately fell over the room like a heavy weight as everyone’s attention (save Lovegood, who was dreamily humming some unknown tune as she inspected the carpet with great interest) was brought back to Severus.

Harry exchanged a nervous glance with him, but offered up a small smile when Severus squeezed his hand reassuringly, once more. “I came across an ancient bonding rite which allowed me to share my magic with Harry, helping to strengthen his magical core.”

“Bonding rite?” Arthur asked, sounding confused. “Are you saying that you and Harry are bonded now?”

“Yes,” Severus answered simply, deciding not to give additional information unless it was warranted. 

“Oh my,” Molly said, falling back into her seat, “is there a way to reverse the bond now that he’s better?”

“What?” Harry suddenly interjected, looking shocked at the question. “Why would I want to reverse the bond? I love Severus…he loves me…we’re not reversing anything.”

“It must have been a very powerful bond,” Kingsley mused. “Did you find it in that book you retrieved from the Malfoy Library?”

“MALFOY Library?” Harry asked with obvious distaste. “When did you go to the Malfoy Library? I thought that was your book?”

“I searched through my own library as well as Hogwarts’, but when the needed information could not be found there, I did go to Kingsley and ask to peruse the Malfoy Library. However, I believe now is not the time for an argument on this matter,” Severus replied, hoping that this revelation would not create problems between them. 

“You performed some dark ritual you found in a Death Eater’s library on Harry when he was that sick?” one of the twins exclaimed, looking horrified. “He probably had no idea as to what you were doing…and now he’s stuck being bonded to you!”

Everyone stilled as a palpable wave of magic rose through the room, causing the windows to rattle and the many teacups to shake and dance across the coffee table. Severus looked toward Harry and saw him struggling to maintain control of his temper and his magic. He quickly began whispering soothingly to him, trying to calm him before his magic could break loose completely and cause damage.

Once he had calmed down and the pulse of magic had receded, Severus held his hand as he turned to deal with his friend’s accusations. “Fred, it wasn’t like that,” Harry said, stepping between the twins and Severus. “While I didn’t know where Severus found the ritual, I did understand what it entailed. I went through with it because I love Severus and because it was the only way to save my life…or had you all forgotten that tidbit?”

Everyone looked a little sheepish after that. Obviously, it was easy to forget that Harry was literally at Death’s door when there was so much outrage over the fact he is now bonded to such an unsavory character. Severus sneered at the hypocrisy. They all claimed to love Harry and want the best for him, but they showed such open disdain at his choice of a partner. He idly wondered if they would have rather seen Harry dead instead of bonded to him.

“I think it’s lovely,” Lovegood said dreamily, suddenly turning an odd, piercing gaze on Severus. “Severus’ love saved Harry’s life and Harry’s love gave Severus a new one. Think of all the things he can do now that the Dark Mark is gone.”

Severus turned a shocked expression towards Harry, not understanding how Loony Lovegood, of all people, could have known that piece of information.

Lovegood smiled at the openly stunned looks she was receiving from everyone in the room. “Can’t you feel it?” she asked, gazing around at the others. “I noticed it as soon as I arrived. That dark, itchy feeling that was always around the Professor…it’s not there anymore. I knew it was from the Dark Mark, because it was all over the other Death Eaters we fought during the War. It must be nice not to have that anymore.”

There were very few times in his life that Severus could admit to being truly gobsmacked. This particular occasion rated rather high in his remembrances of those events. Lovegood seemed to have said her peace, however, because before the other occupants of the room could recover from this odd pronouncement, she had gone back to her study of Harry’s carpet.

“Severus?” Minerva asked.

“It’s true,” Severus answered, sounding uncharacteristically dazed. “The Dark Mark disappeared when we completed the ritual.” Rolling up his left sleeve, he showed his unblemished forearm to the room. 

“But that’s not possible,” Granger pronounced haughtily, causing Severus to groan internally. “We researched it when Draco defected to our side. There’s no way to remove a bonding mark like the Dark Mark. The closest we came to finding a solution was if the bonded chose to replace the mark with another from a stronger wizard…” she trailed off, suddenly looking up at Harry. “You didn’t, did you?” she asked, looking at Harry as if he had suddenly sprouted wings and grown a second head.

Harry looked to Severus, his panic clearly visible just below the surface. Severus pulled Harry against him, whispering soothingly to him for a moment. The others in the room just continued to look on in shocked disbelief.

Placing a soft kiss against Harry’s forehead, Severus stepped in front of him, prepared to take the brunt of the expected aggression. “I researched for weeks to find a way to save Harry’s life,” he said, feeling Harry’s arms wrap around him from behind, offering him some much-needed strength. “I came to the conclusion that the only way for him to survive, was to rebuild his magical core and supply him with enough borrowed magic to fight off the mutation that was the cause of his debilitation. In order for him to have access to the level of magic needed to do this, I realized that a bond, such as the one Voldemort employed, would be needed.”

Severus rolled up his right sleeve and turned his wrist out, showing the lightening bolt and snake, which now resided on his skin. “I have no regrets, nor does Harry. If there had been any other way to save his life, we obviously would have pursued it first, rather than employing such dark magic. However, Harry was days away from death and I love him enough to have done anything necessary to have kept that from happening.”

The silence in the room was deafening as each person processed everything that they had learned. Severus met each pair of eyes, daring anyone to speak out against their decision. 

Surprisingly, it was Minerva who stood first, crossing the room and stopping just in front of Harry and Severus. Expecting her normal stoic support that he had always received from her, he was shocked when she turned to Harry, anger radiating from her small frame.

“Knowing everything that Severus has been through in his life, I cannot fathom how you were able to chain him to you in such a way,” she said abruptly. “You know better than most what he went through at the hands of that megalomaniac after experiencing so many visions of those meetings. How could you Mark him again?”

“Minerva!” Severus shouted, seeing the crushed look on Harry’s face. “You will cease this onslaught immediately. Harry was going to die…do you understand that? Even with the extreme pain he was in, knowing that he was close to death, he argued with me about doing this. I had to convince him to go through with it. He went as far as to say he would rather die than risk my life in any way. I will not have you besmirching his honor or intentions.”

Minerva backed up, visibly surprised at the vehement response from Severus. Chastised, she looked briefly back to Harry before turning and leaving the room, a crack of Apparition following only moments later. A very uncomfortable silence followed, broken only by Harry’s ragged breathing. Seeing the tear escape his eye, Severus enveloped him in an embrace, trying to calm him.

“Does anyone else have anything to say on this matter?” Severus growled.

Molly stood, looking at the pair for a moment before speaking. “I can’t say that I approve of this bond,” she said, eyeing the pair with concern. “However, knowing that it was the only way to save Harry’s life and that he does seem to truly love you…well, I can accept it.” She stepped closer to the two men, surprising Severus with an embrace. “You just better take care of my boy, you hear me?”

Harry let out a watery chuckle at her actions. Severus stiffly endured it, seeing how it obviously relieved Harry. One by one, the others made their way over to them. Granger and her intended reassured Harry that they were happy as long as he was. The twins eyed Severus warily, but offered Harry their reluctant acceptance, as well. 

Kingsley pulled Severus aside, apologizing for revealing where Severus had found the book, offering his congratulations before shaking Harry’s hand and taking his leave, taking the now infamous book along with him. Arthur looked distinctly uncomfortable and left with his wife after grasping Harry’s shoulder in a weak show of acceptance. 

Longbottom approached the pair and eyed his once feared Professor with none of the nervousness he had previously possessed. Turning to Severus, he stood eye to eye with him, showing how much he had matured over the last couple of years. “Luna has assured me that you have all of the best intentions toward Harry,” he said in a strong, assured voice. “I trust her and her instincts more than anything that might come from your mouth. But, know this…” his voice dropping an octave as his magic became palpable, “if you should ever do anything to hurt Harry in any way, you’ll have to answer to me.”

Severus nodded mutely, not quite able to come to grips with this new Longbottom. Severus watched as he turned and enveloped Harry in a warm embrace, promising to always be at his side. Then, with a vacantly smiling Lovegood in tow, he also left.

Feeling exhausted from the events of the day, Severus turned to Harry, looking forward to some time to relax and unwind with the man he loved. However, seeing the stern expression on his face, he knew that relaxing together was the last thing that would be happening that evening.

“We have a few things to talk about, Severus.”


	13. Chapter Thirteen

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


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To Heal a Soul

_A/N: I am going to consciously try to tone down the length of my chapters, thus making it easier for me to turn them out in a timely manner for my wonderful readers. This is the last chapter that I have completely written and beta'ed. Hopefully, I can continue to write and post on a regular basis. I'm aiming for every other day. My undying gratitude goes to rdwind!_

**Chapter Thirteen**

“We have a few things to talk about, Severus,” Harry said, his anger visible.

“I suppose we do,” Severus replied, not looking forward to the confrontation.

“Well? Are you just going to stand there?”

“Until you ask me something worth answering, yes,” Severus answered tersely, already tiring of Harry’s misplaced anger.

“All right, then,” Harry seethed. “How about, were you ever going to tell me that you got that book from the Malfoy Library?”

“Probably not,” Severus conceded. “I don’t see how its origin has any bearing.”

“Of course it has bearing,” Harry fumed. “You know how I feel about the Malfoys!”

Severus sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “I thought you and Draco had settled your differences after he defected to our side.”

“We barely tolerated each other and we managed that only for the greater good. I was thrilled when he left to start over in France,” Harry admitted. “At least now there’s practically no chance that I will ever have to see that pointy-faced ferret again.”

“How mature of you,” Severus sneered. “Draco risked a lot by leaving his life behind and turning against his father.”

“Frankly, I don’t bloody care what he might have risked. He is, was, and always will be one of the most obnoxious gits I have ever known!” Harry yelled. “And then there’s Lucius! My god, Severus, he was a bloody sociopath! He put a price on his own son’s head…he fought beside Bellatrix even after she murdered his wife! If he had a grave I would happily dance all over it.”

“Are you trying to say that you would rather have died than use a resource I procured from the Malfoy Library?”

“No…I mean…you could have at least told me about it!”

“Because this has been so enjoyable an experience,” Severus said, turning and walking into the bedroom to look for a headache cure. “Everyone knows how deplorable Lucius was, Harry. That has nothing to do with that book.”

“Of course it does, Severus. It just makes what we did seem that much worse. Not only was the bonding considered dark magic, but the book it came from belonged to Voldemort’s right-hand man!”

Severus sighed in exasperation, gratefully downing a vial of pain potion for his rapidly worsening headache. “Does any of this have a point, Harry? Or are you going to continue yelling at me for no reason?”

“A point? Do I have a point? Have you been listening to anything I’ve been saying?”

“It would be difficult not to considering the particularly high volume.”

Harry huffed in irritation. “All that talk of loyalty before we did the spell…was that all a bunch of lies? Because running off behind my back and doing this without telling me doesn’t exactly seem very loyal to me.”

Severus had never before understood how someone could “see red”. Harry’s last statement, however, proved it was in fact possible. Crossing the room, Severus grabbed a very surprised Harry by the collar, hauling him up until their faces were almost touching. “How dare you,” he growled, his voice low and menacing. “How dare you question me as to my loyalty. I spent months working on potions for you while I searched and researched for something that would cure you. I gave up everything to be by your side…and you question me?”

He let go of Harry’s collar, pushing him away at the same time, suddenly needing some distance. He held his right arm up, violently tearing back the fabric of his sleeve so that the snake and lightning bolt were clearly visible. “You have no idea what I’ve done for you in the name of love and loyalty.”

Turning around, he began stalking away only to be grabbed from behind and pushed up against the wall. Harry was visibly enraged, his magic beginning to pulse out of control, making the pictures in the room rattle against the wall.

Harry’s eyes were full of unrestrained anger as the magic filled the air. His words were low and carried just the hint of threat as he asked, “Do you think it was easy for me to do that to you? Do you think I wanted to force you into another form of servitude?” His words softened as he admitted, “I love you, you bloody git…I hate that you have to wear that Mark. I hate that you had to sacrifice yourself, yet again, to save me…” his voice rising yet again as he gained momentum. “I know exactly what you’ve done! I know everything that you’ve given up over the years. The fact that you so willingly did so again just makes me love you more, you bloody arse!”

Before Severus could even process everything that had been said, Harry was crushing him into the wall, smothering him under a bruising kiss that was more violent than passionate. Pushing back against him, trying to get some distance and some air to fill his burning lungs, he was unprepared for the surprising strength that kept him pinned against the wall. 

Quickly realizing that he was no match for the now-healthy, young man, Severus began fighting back through the kiss, giving back as much as he was receiving. The kiss became more teeth than lips as they fought for dominance. Harry grabbed his arms, which were still ineffectually trying to push him back, pulling them up and holding them easily as he crushed his body back against Severus’. 

At once, he felt Harry’s erection pressing against his thigh and realized suddenly how aroused he, himself, was. Apparently, Harry noticed as well, because he let out a shuddering moan and began thrusting his hips against Severus’ still-pinned body. Moaning back at the delicious friction, Severus was surprised, but ecstatic when Harry let go of his arms, allowing him to grab Harry by the arse, pulling him impossibly closer as he thrust back.

Their moans soon turned into breathless grunts and groans as their movements became frantic. Harry finally released Severus’ mouth, only to move to his neck and bite down harshly, ripping a shout from Severus’ throat. Severus felt Harry begin ripping at his clothing, struggling to get to his skin. Severus’ blood deprived brain saw this as a marvelous idea and began to return the favor. Soon the sound of buttons popping and fabric ripping filled the air. Severus hissed as his heated skin finally came into contact with Harry’s. 

Severus cried out as Harry’s hand finally found its way around his almost painfully swollen cock and screamed out in both pleasure and agony as he began pulling roughly on it. Wrapping his hand around Harry’s swollen member, he roughly began stroking, feeling justified as Harry cried out, as well. 

Moments later, Harry screamed as he climaxed, spurting his hot release against Severus’ hand and chest. Harry’s hand clenched tightly around Severus’ cock, ripping his own orgasm from him. He had never come so violently in his life, and his vision blurred as he sagged back against the wall, only vaguely aware of Harry’s weight as he collapsed forward against him.

After several minutes of ragged breathing and many whispered oaths, they both straightened up, neither completely sure of what to do next.

Severus silently Accio’ed his wand, muttering a Cleaning Charm to remove their mess before turning to try and salvage some of his abused clothing that was now littered across the floor. Before he could bend to retrieve it, however, Harry reached out and stilled him. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “Not for this,” he said with a blush, “but for saying all that rubbish about your loyalty. I didn’t mean it. I was just upset at finding out…well, you know.”

“Yes. Let’s not rehash that,” Severus replied and Harry smiled sheepishly. “That was…surprising.”

Harry chuckled, his blush deepening attractively as he ducked his head in embarrassment. “I didn’t expect it, either.”

“I had no idea you could be so…dominating,” Severus said with a smirk as he placed a hand beneath Harry’s chin and lifted his face. “I do believe I could come to enjoy that side of you.”

Harry leaned in, capturing Severus’ lips in another deep, but much gentler kiss. “I guess you just bring that out in me,” he said, moving to Severus’ neck to gently kiss the abused and purpling skin there. “I didn’t hurt you too badly, did I?”

“No, you didn’t, don’t worry. I suppose I should apologize to you, as well. I did not mean to hide anything from you. I simply did not realize it would have meant so much to you,” Severus said, tilting his head to allow better access. 

Harry stopped his ministrations, straightening up and meeting Severus’ gaze. “I don’t know why it bothered me so much. I was just so overwhelmed from everyone’s reactions…I’m sorry I took it out on you.”

Severus smiled lasciviously. “I’m not sorry you took it out on me. It was actually quite enjoyable.”

Harry blushed again, but returned the smile. “I thought it was pretty great, myself. You’re not upset that I took control like that, are you?”

“No, Harry, I’m not,” Severus assured him, pulling him into an embrace. “There are very few times in my life where I have been comfortable submitting to someone. Perhaps because I have been forced to submit in other ways for so long. However,” he said, pausing to drop a quick kiss against Harry’s lips, “I do believe that submitting to you would be most satisfying.”

Harry groaned and closed his eyes as his head fell forward against Severus’ shoulder. “Gods, Severus…the things you do to me.”

“Weren’t we discussing the things you were going to do to me?”

Harry chuckled and pulled back, meeting his eyes again. “I love you.”

“And I love you, brat,” Severus replied, grasping his hand and leading him towards the bed. “For now, however, it has been an exhausting day and I believe we could both do with a nap before dinner.”

Harry yawned his approval and sank down onto the bed, snuggling up against Severus. Pulling the duvet up over them, Severus happily inhaled the mixed scent of Harry and sex as he quickly descended into sleep.


	14. Chapter Fourteen

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


* * *

To Heal a Soul

 

****

To Heal a Soul

__

A/N: Thank you for all the continued support to this story! Of course, thanks to rdwind; she’s been pivotal for the next couple of chapters! Don’t forget to leave a review! :) 

**  
**

Chapter Fourteen

As they ate their dinner that night, Harry and Severus exchanged several lust-filled glances over the roast chicken. Severus couldn’t help but recall the forceful way in which Harry took control earlier, and felt his body respond at the thought. Now that Harry was fully recovered and they had gotten past the confrontation with his friends, Severus was hoping that Harry would want to move their relationship further, physically.

Just the thought of what it would be like to join completely with Harry in _that_ way was making Severus’ trousers uncomfortably tight. However, Severus decided that he would not be the one to make that move. He had promised Harry that he would not pressure him in any way. After the impromptu vertical, near-shagging that had happened earlier, though, that promise was becoming harder to keep.

Forcing himself to think on other matters, Severus began to wonder about what was next for Harry. Now that he was well, he could do anything that he wanted. The future had never been a topic of conversation between the two, since, for obvious reasons, it had been too painful for Harry. But, suddenly, the Boy Who Lived now had a future, again. Severus hoped that he would remain a part of it.

Looking over at Harry, he could tell that the younger wizard was lost in his own thoughts. Smiling at the peaceful expression on his face, he decided that they should discuss next steps – both for their relationship and the future in general.

Once Dobby had cleared away the dishes from pudding, he coaxed Harry into the sitting room and pulled him down next to him on the settee. 

"Harry, there are a few things we should discuss now that the excitement has wound down," he said.

"Okay," Harry replied. "What’s on your mind?"

"I believe we need to discuss the future. There are a lot of things we will need to decide on."

"Like what?" Harry asked.

"Where do we go next, for instance." Severus supplied.

"Is there somewhere in particular you wanted to go, Severus?" Harry asked, looking confused.

Smiling, Severus answered, "No, Harry. I meant in our relationship. How would you like to proceed? On top of that is the matter of what you will be doing now that you are well. Have you any interest in an occupation?"

Harry looked thoughtful for a moment. "I hadn’t really thought about it. For years I’d wanted to be an Auror, as you know. But that seems like so long ago, now," he said, his eyes going a bit distant. "I don’t think I ever really expected to survive the final battle, and then I did. I never had a chance to think about the future seriously, though, since I came up sick a few months later. "Did you have any thoughts?" he asked.

"Well, as for myself, I really do need to get back to my home," Severus started, but paused when he saw Harry go shockingly pale. "What is it?" he asked concernedly.

"You’re leaving me? Now?"

"Not right this minute, no," Severus answered, not understanding Harry’s panic. "But there are several things I must see to, soon."

"Oh," Harry said, looking crestfallen, "I just thought…nevermind."

"Harry? What is it? What has you so upset?" he asked, taking hold of Harry’s chin and tipping his face up to meet his eyes.

"I guess I never realized that you would want to leave."

Suddenly, Severus realized his mistake. "Harry…I’m not leaving permanently," he explained, seeing confusion and hopefulness battle each other for dominance on Harry’s face. "I just meant that I must return there to see to my possessions…my lab. I have several research projects on hold that I really should get back to, once we are settled. I never meant for you to think I was leaving you."

Harry released a relieved sigh before reaching forward and grabbing Severus’ hand. "Thank Merlin," he said with an embarrassed smile. "I don’t think I could bear it if you left me now."

"Nor could I, Harry," Severus assured him. "I wish to remain with you for as long as you’ll have me. As for my work, I can proceed with my research projects just as easily here as there, so I plan on closing up my little house and officially taking up residence here, if you have no objections, of course."

Harry leapt onto Severus’ lap, bringing their mouths together in a searing kiss, showing his obvious approval to Severus’ plans. Chuckling as they pulled apart, Severus ran a hand lovingly through the messy black tangles on Harry’s head.

"Now that we have me straightened out, we should begin working on what to do with you," Severus said. "What are the types of things you think you would enjoy in a career?"

"Severus, I honestly have no bloody idea," Harry said with a laugh. "Maybe I’ll firecall Hermione tomorrow and ask her to bring me some pamphlets from the Ministry. I’m sure she’ll have at least a hundred ideas for me."

"Indeed," Severus replied, trying in vain to keep the sneer from his face at the mention of the irritating know-it-all. 

"Now, now, Severus," Harry chided, "I know that you’re not overly fond of my friends, but they are making an effort to understand."

Sighing heavily, Severus knew that he would have to overcome his abject distaste for the Weasleys and the other assorted pests that Harry called his friends and family. "I will also endeavor to be more understanding," he promised, earning a wide smile from his young lover. 

Kissing Severus soundly, Harry melted against his frame, pressing as close as possible against Severus’ chest. Groaning at the contact, Severus felt himself become instantly hard. Amazed at the way Harry constantly affected his body, he pulled the younger wizard impossibly closer. Having Harry straddled over his lap caused a heady friction. Grinding up against Harry, Severus let his head fall back as Harry returned the favor, rubbing and writhing and frotting. Their seated position made it easy for them to hurry their movements, bringing them both to the edge and pushing them over so quickly that Severus was dizzy. 

Exhausted but sated, the two men readied for bed and quickly fell asleep, wrapped in each other’s arms.

~~~~~**~~~~~

The next morning, Severus awoke early so that he could return to his small house in Spinner’s End. Once in the shower, his thoughts turned to their activities of the previous day. At once, his cock hardened and demanded attention. Just the thought of the way Harry had forcefully pressed him into the wall and frotted against him had him aching for release. Feeling absurdly like a hormonal teenager, Severus took his erection in hand and fell into the memory of Harry touching him. Quickly speeding up his strokes, it was only a few moments before he was shooting his release against the wall of the shower. Leaning against his arm as he regained his breath, he had a stray thought that he might end up wanking himself raw on a regular basis while not pressuring Harry.

When he emerged from the shower, Harry had still been asleep, so Severus spent a few moments fondly watching him. Although he longed to take that last step and consummate his relationship with Harry, he still felt truly content, just being with him. However, he was only human, after all. Seeing Harry splayed out across the bed, pleasantly rumpled from his night of sleep, Severus felt a faint stirring of arousal, despite his recent release. Quickly deciding that Harry was simply too delicious-looking to leave unmolested, Severus cautiously climbed back onto the bed, slowly pulling away the sheet that was haphazardly covering his young lover.

Gently easing the pyjama bottoms lower on his body, Severus exposed Harry’s half-hard cock. He smiled as he saw it twitch in the cool air. Crawling over Harry’s body, he lowered himself over his prize and slowly, teasingly blew some air across it, watching as it twitched again. Harry, oblivious in slumber, did not stir. 

Carefully, he eased his mouth around the quickly firming flesh, relishing the unique scent and flavor. Harry gave a low moan and shifted slightly, but still did not wake. Smiling around his mouthful, Severus began to slowly work his tongue and lips, taking in more of the now hard length before pulling back. Paying attention to the sensitive slit, he drew another moan from Harry. Working in earnest, he began moving up and down, taking more and more of Harry’s cock down his throat, finally bringing him to full wakefulness.

"Oh, gods, Severus," Harry cried out, fisting the sheets as he looked on in disbelief. "What…oh, gods…don’t stop."

Pleased at the responsive way in which Harry was moaning and trying to thrust into his mouth, Severus began alternating strong suction with the deep-throating. Knowing that Harry was close, he took his length all the way into his throat, humming around it. Harry groaned, which changed into a growl, just before he shouted, "SEVERUS!" and his release shot out, surging into Severus’ mouth. 

Releasing the now-softening cock from his mouth, Severus smiled again at Harry’s appearance. He looked completely debauched as he lay there – arms flung wide, heaving chest, and pants barely clinging to his legs. 

"What was that for?" Harry panted, smiling as he tried to recover.

"Do I need a reason?" Severus teased.

"No, not at all," Harry replied, smiling dazedly. "Please, feel free…anytime."

Severus chuckled before kissing him softly on the mouth and tucking him back under the sheet. "I’m off to Spinner’s End. I should return by nightfall."

Harry nodded sleepily at him, already falling back into slumber. Chuckling again at the sight, Severus left him to it.

~~~~~**~~~~~

It took Severus several hours to pack his few meager belongings along with his potions lab and to close up his one-time home. Smiling as he thought of how they had spent the previous afternoon and that morning, he finished shrinking the last of his boxes, placing them with the rest of his possessions in a satchel. Apparating back to the front door of Harry’s house, he let himself in and went directly to the cellar to resize and put away all of his potions equipment. 

Once finished, he ventured upstairs, curious to see how Harry’s day had gone. Hearing Harry’s voice, he followed it to the kitchen, where he could hear him talking with Granger. Taking a fortifying breath, he was about to push open the door and enter when he heard his name.

"But don’t you think it’s odd the way Snape just suddenly became so submissive toward you?" the she-devil was asking. 

Severus stepped closer to the door, curious as to how this discussion would play out.

"I guess," Harry answered noncommittally. "I really didn’t think much about it. I was just shocked that I was strong enough to pin him like that. He’s got at least two stone on me, but I completely overpowered him. Do you think that the bond is still leeching his magic away?"

Severus didn’t know whether to be upset that Harry was discussing their private moments with Granger, of all people, or to be touched that he was concerned over whether or not Severus was having ill-effects from the bond. Cracking the door slightly, he could just see Granger’s irritatingly snobbish expression. 

"It’s possible," she said, tapping her finger against the table as she considered it, "but he doesn’t seem to be suffering any sort of magical drain. In fact, he seemed quite formidable yesterday afternoon. What caused your aggression?"

Easing back from the doorway, Severus left to put away the rest of his belongings, his mind heavy with what he had heard. Lost in his own thoughts, he didn’t hear the rest of their discussion.

~~**~~

"What do you mean?" Harry answered defensively.

"Well, did he do something to cause you to get so angry?"

"He challenged me!" Harry yelled suddenly. "He claimed I didn’t understand what he’s gone through!"

Hermione shrank back, surprised at the wild outburst from her friend. "Harry, calm down," she urged. "I think maybe we should research the effects of this bond a little more. From what you’ve told me, neither of you is acting quite normally."

Harry hung his head, breathing deeply to try and calm himself. "I’m sorry, Hermione. It seems like my emotions are all over the place lately."

Hermione smiled and patted his hand. "It’s understandable, Harry. You’ve been through quite a bit. I’ll take look at that book and see if it offers any explanation as to what you’ve been going through."

"That won’t be necessary," Harry said shortly. "I’ll take care of it."

"Okay, Harry," Hermione said tentatively. "Well, I should be going. But…Harry…you know that I’m here for you, right?"

"Like you were when I was dying?" he asked, instantly regretting it. Sighing heavily, Harry said, "I’m sorry. I know you are, Hermione. I’ll firecall you, okay?" Hermione nodded and then disappeared through the Floo.

Meanwhile…Severus was sitting on the bed in his now-unused room. He hadn’t thought about it at the time, but in truth, it was odd that he had been so powerless against Harry’s aggression. Worrying over the possible unforeseen ramifications of their bonding, he waited, knowing that Harry would soon come looking for him. 


	15. Chapter Fifteen

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


* * *

To Heal a Soul

 

****

To Heal a Soul

 

Chapter Fifteen

As expected, Harry soon arrived at the open door to Severus’ room.

"When did you get back?" he asked, entering the room and sitting down beside Severus.

"A short time ago. I took some time to set up my equipment in the lab and to put away my belongings," Severus explained.

"Why didn’t you come see me?" Harry asked, sounding a little hurt.

"I did, but you were busy with your guest. I did not want to interrupt your discussion."

"I see," Harry answered tersely. "Did you, by chance, happen to hear what we were discussing?"

"I did," Severus admitted. "I did not mean to eavesdrop, and I did not linger for long."

"How much did you hear?"

"Only that you and Granger were concerned as to my recent streak of submission."

Harry was quiet for a moment before turning and taking Severus’ hand in his. "I’m sorry to have been talking about you behind your back," he said. "Your submissiveness wasn’t the only topic of conversation, though. Hermione also pointed out that I’ve been rather aggressive. She thinks it has something to do with the bond and suggested that I look into it a little more."

"I’ve already researched the bond," Severus answered shortly. "We both know what it was originally designed for. Obviously our recent behavior is just an expression of the bond settling."

Harry’s hand clenched, causing Severus to gasp as his hand was crushed in his grasp. "You told me that it wouldn’t change how we are…that it wouldn’t make me like Voldemort."

"You’re not like him, Harry," Severus said soothingly, feeling the first stirrings of Harry’s power as he became increasingly distressed. "I’m sure things will settle down in time."

"But you don’t know that for sure," Harry answered, his hand still squeezing Severus’ like a vice.

"Harry, please…you’re hurting me. You have to calm down."

Looking up in shock, Harry met Severus’ eyes and then looked down to their hands, releasing his hold immediately. "I’m so sorry, Severus," he said, his eyes filling with tears. "I can’t stand this! I don’t want to act like this…treat you like this. I’m hurting you without even realizing it. I never wanted to force you to submit to me…it’s not right. We have to do something."

Severus hated to see that look of panic and desperation on Harry’s face. In truth, he was very uncomfortable with his increasing desires to submit completely to his young lover. He had expected to have a desire to protect Harry and to remain loyal to him…but not this. He certainly hadn’t expected the changes that Harry had been undergoing.

"What do you want to do, Harry. Whatever you want…whatever you need, you know I’ll do it," he said, reaching up a hand to lightly caress Harry’s cheek.

Harry pressed against his hand, letting his eyes close. "Are you saying that because of the bond?" he asked.

"No," Severus assured him. "It is only my desire to make you happy and well. That was present before the bond, as you know."

Harry opened his eyes and gave him a small smile for his efforts. "Thank you, Severus," he said. "I need to see that book again. Maybe we missed something. Maybe there is some explanation as to what is happening or a way to set things to rights."

Severus nodded his head, immediately rising from the bed to do as Harry asked. Apparating to the Ministry, he went directly to Kingsley’s office, reclaimed the book, and returned before he realized what he had done. The desire to follow Harry’s instructions…to do whatever was necessary to give him what he wished, was becoming very strong. He returned to his room and found Harry still sitting on the bed. Casting the appropriate protective spells, he handed over the book without delay. 

Harry looked at him strangely for a moment before turning his full attention to the book, thumbing through it until he came to the ritual they had used. Severus watched him, his mind a maelstrom of conflicting thoughts and emotions. 

__

"The introduction of the blood of the willing supplicant," he read, " _will ensure his devotion and total submission to the binder. If the blood is taken by force, the supplicant will still be forced to the binder’s will, but will not possess the devotion or desire to bend to the binder’s will. The spell will produce the best results with the supplicant at full possession of his powers so that all of his powers will be available to the binder at all times."_

After a few moments, Harry looked up from his reading, casting a wary gaze upon Severus. "You changed the ritual," he said evenly.

"Yes, I did," Severus answered.

"Why?"

"Because we did not need some of the elements behind the bond. We did not require the blood magic portion of the spellwork, as you were not looking to enslave me," he explained.

"And the bit about the supplicant being at full power?"

"You know as well as I do that it was not possible to fulfill that requirement of the bond. Again, since we were not looking to bend me to your will, it should not have mattered," Severus replied.

"I see. Why didn’t you discuss these changes with me beforehand?"

Severus sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation and trying not to wince at Harry’s harsh words. "Obviously because I did not believe you needed to know about it. You were upset enough about marking me as it was. Are you saying now you would have preferred the original bonding? Do you want to enslave me completely?"

"Of course not," Harry snapped, shoving the book off to the side and standing abruptly. "But you still should have told me about the different variations. For all I know, you bollixed something up when you changed it. Maybe your shoddy spellwork is the cause of what’s happening now," he said coldly, his magic beginning to radiate outward in angry pulses. Severus quickly backed away, pressing himself against the headboard of the bed and curling in on himself, lowering his head.

At once, Severus felt the waves of magic melt away and the pressure of Harry’s hand beneath his chin, raising his face upward to meet his gaze.

"I’m sorry," Harry said softly. "I have a feeling I’ll be saying that quite a bit, now." His hand lifted and softly caressed Severus’ cheek.

Severus leaned into the contact, feeling at odds over his body’s desire to submit. "Perhaps we should contact Healer Applewhite," he suggested. "He might be able to help…or at least offer some suggestions."

Harry sank back down onto the bed, rubbing his hands wearily over his face. "I’m getting quite out of hand, aren’t I?" he asked, looking up and surprising Severus with the sadness evident in his features.

"I think we both are under quite a lot of stress while our new bond is settling," Severus offered, settling beside him and wrapping his arms around him. "I love you, Harry. We’ll get to the bottom of this."

"I hope you’re right," Harry said.

~~~~~**~~~~~

"Aperire iugum*," Healer Applewhite intoned, wincing a bit at the brightness of the revealed colors shining between the two men. "Very interesting," he mumbled to himself as he looked back at his notes and the bonding book lying in front of him.

Severus and Harry glanced at each other, both feeling uncomfortable at the intense examination.

"What is it?" Harry asked, clasping hands with Severus nervously.

"Well, I’m certainly no expert in magical bonds," the Healer explained, opening another book and flipping quickly through the pages, "but this seems to be quite unique."

"Why am I not surprised," Harry grumbled under his breath. Severus chuckled despite the seriousness of the situation. At Harry’s harsh look, he quieted immediately, bowing his head. The Healer looked up, his brow creasing as he watched the two men.

"I take it that this is the sort of behavior you were telling me about?" he asked, gesturing to Severus’ obvious submission.

"Yes," Harry answered. "No matter how we try to fight it, it keeps getting worse. I’m afraid…" Harry trailed off, looking almost desperately over at Severus. "I’m afraid that I might end up hurting him."

"I see. So, you are concerned that your aggression and domination is becoming unhealthy?"

"Yes," Harry answered.

"Well, it is quite obvious that your bond has not settled yet. It almost seems as though it is trying to morph into a different kind of bond," he said, returning to his books.

"How is that possible?" Severus asked.

"I’m not sure," the Healer admitted. "Like I said, I’m not an expert. But the shifting colors in the bond show that it is struggling to reach balance. Have you consummated this bond, yet?"

Harry ducked his head, clearly blushing at being asked such a blunt question. "No," Severus said. "Would that help the bond to settle?"

"Normally, I’d say yes. However, with the bond so clearly trying to shift or morph into a more complementary fit, I’m not sure it would be wise to do so at this time. Consummating now might simply cause the bond to remain in its current, unstable state."

Harry and Severus exchanged a nervous look. "What do you suggest?" Harry asked.

Healer Applewhite sighed, rubbing his eyes wearily as he closed the books and rolled up his notes. "I’m afraid I don’t know what to suggest," he admitted. "Your bond is badly in need of a stabilizer. Because of this bonding, you have both been forced into roles you would not normally take. Your own innate magic is fighting the bond, which is why it is so unstable."

"So what do we do now?" Severus asked.

"Let me consult with one of my colleagues. Perhaps he can give me some information that might help," the Healer said, gathering his things and standing. "I’ll be in touch as soon as I can. Just…try to be patient with each other." Nodding to each of them, he took his leave.

"Patient, he says," Harry snorted. "I’d like to see him try to be patient."

"We’ll get through this, Harry," Severus said soothingly, trying to convince Harry as much as himself. "We’ve gotten through worse, haven’t we?"

Harry nodded and rested his head against Severus’ shoulder. "Maybe we should just look into revoking the bond. I’m healed, so it won’t adversely affect me, right?"

Severus sighed and placed a kiss onto Harry’s head. "I don’t think it will be possible, love. Unless you plan on finding another, stronger wizard with whom I can enact another bond, I’m afraid you’re stuck with me."

Harry’s head shot up quickly, banging Severus’ chin painfully in the process, his green eyes bright with unrestrained jealousy. "You’re not bonding with anyone else," he said loudly. "You’re mine!"

Severus shivered at the possessiveness and strength with which Harry had spoken. "Yes, Harry. I am yours."

__

* Aperire iugum – reveal bond


	16. Chapter Sixteen

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


* * *

****

To Heal a Soul

_A/N: Thanks, as always, to rdwind for all her help. And a huge thanks and a big HUG to all the wonderful reviewers!_

**Chapter Sixteen**

Harry’s head shot up quickly, banging Severus’ chin painfully in the process, his green eyes bright with unrestrained jealousy. “You’re not bonding with anyone else,” he said loudly. “You’re mine!”

Severus shivered at the possessiveness and strength with which Harry had spoken. “Yes, Harry. I am yours.”

“That’s right,” Harry said in a low, almost menacing voice, “you’re mine.” He wove his hand into Severus’ dark hair, suddenly gripping and pulling tightly, causing him to hiss in pain. “No one is going to touch you but me.”

“Yes, Harry,” Severus gasped, feeling himself become aroused at the display of control and power. “Only yours.”

Harry clamped his teeth onto Severus’ throat, sucking and biting until a large mark rose onto the skin. Still holding Severus’ hair in a tight grip, he pulled his head back up so that their eyes met. Severus could feel a blush coming up on his face, but he knew he could not look away.

“And if I decided to claim you now? Force the bond so that you would always be submissive to me? Would you fight me?” he asked, an almost wild look in his eyes.

“No,” Severus answered, shocked to find that it was true. “I believe it is clear that I will willingly do whatever you wish of me.”

Harry gasped and his eyes widened; the intensity fading and realization slowly creeping into their green depths. “Oh, gods, Severus,” he whispered, releasing his grip of Severus’ hair. “What is happening to me?”

Severus didn’t answer. Instead, he slowly slipped from the bed, kneeling before Harry and reaching for the button on his trousers.

“What are you…” Harry tried to ask, but words failed him as Severus reached in and pulled his hardened length from their confines. “Merlin save me,” he whispered.

Severus could feel the tug of the bond demanding that he submit in any and every way to his bonder, so he did the first thing he could think of that would hopefully satisfy the demand. Taking Harry’s cock into his mouth, he began licking, nipping and sucking on it, reveling in the sounds Harry was making.

Once again, Harry wove his hands into Severus’ hair, but this time he didn’t tug or pull. Guiding Severus’ head, he began slowly thrusting into his mouth, incoherent ramblings falling from his lips. It was only a moment later that Severus felt Harry stiffen and begin to fill his mouth with his release, crying out his name.

Releasing the rapidly softening length from his mouth, he realized just how painfully aroused he, himself was. Working frantically at the fastenings to his trousers, he practically ripped his cock from beneath the layers of fabric to begin stroking furiously. 

Harry grabbed his hands, pulling them away and leading Severus up onto the bed. Urging him to lay down, Harry straddled his legs and took up the job of working Severus’ leaking cock.

The sight of Harry above him, pulling and stroking his length was just too much, and he came, crying out Harry’s name as his vision grayed around the edges. When he was finally able to open his eyes again, he groaned aloud. There was Harry, slowly licking the evidence of Severus’ climax from his fingers. When he was finished, he slowly crawled up along his body, taking his mouth in a fierce, possessive kiss.

Finally pulling back, Harry looked deeply into his eyes. “I do love you, you know,” he said, a little sadly. “I don’t want to treat you like this, but I can’t seem to stop.”

“I know you love me, foolish brat,” Severus responded, finally feeling more himself. “And I love you, as well. We’ll figure something out.”

Exhaustion quickly overcame both of them, and they fell into the sleep of the truly sated.

~~~~~**~~~~~

It was two days before Healer Applewhite returned. Two days of fighting the urge to consummate the bond, of high emotions and arguments and angry frotting to release the build up of stress. Severus wasn’t sure he could take much more.

When the healer arrived at their front door, his somber expression killed what little hope Severus had allowed to build. 

“I wish I had better news for you,” Healer Applewhite said. “Unfortunately, my colleague was unable to offer any suggestions. After looking through my notes, he was completely at a loss. The changing nature of your bond and the uniqueness of your situation have cast you into unknown waters. His only advice was to consummate the bond and try to adjust to your new circumstances.”

“Bloody hell!” Harry shouted. “What the buggering good does that do us?”

“Harry, please calm down,” Severus said, taking his hand and pulling him closer. “No one could have foreseen this and yelling will not help anything.”

Harry took a few deep breaths and regained control over his emotions, falling despondently against Severus’ side. “I’m so sorry, Severus. This is all my fault.”

Severus turned his face up so that their eyes met. “None of this is your fault, Harry,” he said with certainty. “No matter the outcome, I would not change a thing.”

“How can you say that?”

“Because you are alive and you are here with me,” Severus answered, taking his lips in a soft kiss.

They were brought back to their senses by Healer Applewhite clearing his throat. Looking up, they saw the healer blushing brightly and averting his eyes. “Well, as I said, I wish I had been the bearer of better news. However, there is the possibility that after the consummation, things will just settle down and return to normal.”

“But you do not think that is the case,” Severus supplied.

Sighing heavily, the healer met his steady gaze. “No, I do not,” he answered. “I believe that, while consummation will settle the bond so that it is not so unstable, it will lock you into the roles in which you are now heading.”

“Thank you for your assistance, Healer Applewhite,” Severus said, standing to show him to the door.

“If you need anything, please do not ever hesitate to call on me,” the healer said as he left.

Returning to Harry’s side, he once again pulled the smaller man against his side and began rubbing soothing circles on his back. “No matter what, Harry, I will always love you.”

Harry bit back a sob, turning his head into the crook of Severus’ neck. “I never wanted this. I never wanted to force you into anything. You should have let me die.”

“NO!” Severus said forcefully, pulling him even tighter. “Never say that. I love you and I would never have wanted to live without you. We will deal with this as we have dealt with everything else. Let’s go to bed, love. We will make our decisions in the morning.”

Pulling him up from the settee, Severus led Harry to the bedroom and undressed him before urging him to lie down on the bed. Although exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster of the past few days, Severus knew that neither of them would sleep well that night.

~~~~~**~~~~~

The next morning dawned bright and warm as the sun broke above the horizon. All signs pointed to a glorious day, which made Severus feel all the more despondent. At this point, he was almost looking forward to the inevitable; he was so tired of fighting against the bond.

Rolling over to look at Harry, he was not surprised to see darkly shadowed eyes staring back at him. “Good morning,” he offered, getting no response. “I know you are upset with the turn events have taken, Harry, but I don’t believe we can fight this much longer.”

“I’m so afraid that I’ll hurt you, Severus,” Harry whispered.

“You could never truly hurt me, Harry,” Severus assured him. “Not as long as you continue to love me.”

Knowing that he would have to take the first step, Severus leaned forward and captured Harry’s lips in a slow, sensual kiss. Nibbling on his lower lip and running his tongue over the abused flesh, he felt a surge of arousal as Harry moaned and opened his mouth to deepen the kiss. 

As their tongues met and twined together, Severus happily gave in to the desire to be submissive. Relief flooded him as he willingly gave up the struggle to fight the bond. Harry ran his hands over Severus’ body, rolling him over and pressing his body into the mattress.

Severus moaned and arched into Harry’s touch, feeling his magic swell out and flood into his body with every caress. Harry left his mouth and traveled downwards, laving and biting his neck, shoulders, and collarbone, pulling moans and gasps from Severus as he moved. 

Harry quickly reached his boxer-clad erection, removing the offending garment hurriedly. Bending his head low, he applied his talented lips and tongue to bring about pleasure bordering on torture. Arching up into the moist heat of Harry’s mouth, Severus cried out, begging and pleading for more. Kicking off his own boxers, Harry crawled back up Severus’ body and ground their heated flesh together, causing them both to cry out.

Harry fumbled for the lube that he kept in the bedside table, quickly slicking up his fingers. Severus groaned in anticipation, pulling his legs up and out to reveal his hole. Harry groaned as he looked down at his willingly submissive partner, heightening Severus’ desire and arousal all the more. Harry crushed their lips together again as he began circling Severus’ pucker, gently probing and adding pressure until the tip of his finger breached the opening and began sliding in.

Bearing down against the pressure, Severus eagerly accepted Harry’s finger, gasping at the intrusion but longing for more. Harry quickly prepared him, adding a second and then a third finger, his breathing becoming ragged as he watched Severus becoming more and more incoherent with each passing second.

Pulling his fingers from Severus’ entrance, Harry quickly slicked his erection. Severus opened his eyes and met the dilated, but still brilliantly green gaze staring down at him. “You are mine,” Harry growled.

“Merlin, yes,” Severus gasped out, feeling the truth behind the statement and desiring it completely. “Always yours.” Severus pushed against the blunt tip of Harry’s cock, wanting to feel it enter him, needing to feel Harry claim him once and for all.

In one long, slow thrust, Harry pushed his way inside Severus, not stopping until he was completely enveloped. Pausing for a moment, the only sounds in the room were the ragged, gasping breaths of the two men. Slowly at first, but quickly increasing in pace, Harry began thrusting in and out. Severus arched up into every thrust, meeting Harry each time, crying out as Harry repeatedly brushed over his prostate. 

Lost in the sensations, Severus began begging for more, faster, harder as Harry complied with each and every demand. As waves of pleasure began building and spiraling through his body, Severus felt the first pulses of Harry’s magic surge out, enveloping him as the bond began to form and settle around them. His own magic answered and joined Harry’s, creating a visible glow around them as they continued to thrust in and against each other.

Finally, just as Severus felt he would be lost forever in the increasing and overpowering sensations, his climax erupted out of him. Crying out and arching up as he continued to pulse and spurt out his completion, Harry tensed above him. A moment later, Severus felt his insides flood with Harry’s hot release. 

The glowing light surrounding them pulsed brightly before ceasing completely, just as Harry collapsed on top of Severus. Feeling the waves of magic slowly ebb away, Severus gave in to the encroaching darkness, slipping into unconsciousness with Harry’s weight reassuringly pressing against him.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


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To Heal a Soul

_A/N: Thanks to all of you who have taken the time to read and review my story! It really means a lot to me! And, of course, many hugs and cookies to rdwind!_

**Chapter Seventeen**

When Severus woke, he wished he hadn’t. 

Harry was still lying atop him and snoring softly. In addition, it seemed that neither of them managed to stay conscious long enough to clean the results of their consummation the previous evening. Severus groaned as he tried to shift a bit under Harry’s weight, only to feel the dry, flaky remains pulling at his chest hair.

“Harry,” he mumbled, hoping to wake his lover enough to get him to move. Harry responded with a snore. Sighing heavily, Severus resignedly accepted the fact that he was, for the time being, trapped.

While he waited for Harry to resume consciousness, he began taking a mental inventory of his faculties. His body felt no different than before their coupling and, as far as he could tell, his mind was no different, either. Of course, he analyzed, if his personality or thought patterns had been changed, there was a possibility he would not be aware of it. Other than being extremely fatigued, he felt the same as he always did.

Feeling an increasing need to use the loo, Severus struggled once more with Harry’s dead weight. Having no more luck with this attempt, he groaned in frustration. He was exhausted and felt weak and was irritated with his inability to move or get out from underneath Harry. 

“Harry, for Merlin’s sake, get off of me!” he yelled, finally getting some results. 

Harry jerked upward at Severus’ shout, managing to smash his head into Severus’ chin (again) and tearing out several chest hairs by separating so quickly. Severus hissed at the unexpected onslaught, rolling out from underneath as Harry massaged the back of his head.

“What the bloody hell was that for?” Harry asked in irritation.

“I was unable to move and I have a rather pressing need to which I must attend,” Severus explained as he wearily rose from the bed and headed to the ensuite.

Once he saw to his need, Severus wet a flannel to clean his chest, returning to Harry to do the same. Climbing back onto the bed, he very slowly and carefully washed Harry’s chest. Harry let his head fall back against the pillow and practically purred.

“That feels so good, Severus,” he said. Rising up on one elbow, he cocked his head at Severus and looked at him appraisingly. “How are you feeling?”

“I am quite tired and feel a bit weak,” Severus confessed. “However, I do not feel as though anything else is amiss. And you?”

“I’m not sure,” Harry answered. “I don’t think I feel any differently. I actually feel quite rested, myself.”

Severus put aside the flannel and laid his head on Harry’s chest, ready to fall back asleep now that his immediate needs were resolved. Harry, however, had other ideas.

“Come on now, Severus,” he said, prodding him, “no lounging around. We need to get up and about.”

“Whatever for?” Severus asked, burrowing his head a little deeper into Harry’s chest.

“I want to start checking our bond…see if anything actually has changed.”

Severus huffed indignantly, but rolled over and sat up, grinding his palms into his sleep-weary eyes. “Very well,” he said. “Would you go and put on some tea, then?”

Harry kissed him enthusiastically and then bounded out of the room. Severus wanted to glare at him, but found he lacked the energy to do so. Wearily heaving himself up from the bed, he pulled on a dressing gown and trudged from the room. As he neared the kitchen, he heard an explosion, a crash, and several muttered oaths. Rushing in, he saw Harry standing over the remains of what he could only assume was the teakettle.

“Do I want to know?” he asked once he was sure Harry was unhurt.

“My magic seems to be a bit off this morning,” he replied, grinning sheepishly. Raising one eyebrow inquisitively, Severus waited for more information. “I Accio’ed it and it sort of…exploded.”

Severus sighed again, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Perhaps you should have a seat,” he suggested, moving around the table to see to the mess. Pulling out his wand, he said, “Evanesco,” only to have the twisted, black lump remain mockingly on the floor. Looking up worriedly at Harry, he took a calming breath and attempted the spell again, ending up with the same results.

“Severus?” Harry asked concernedly.

Severus had no words with which to answer. Deciding to try something different, he again focused on the lump and, with a swish and a flick, said, “Wingardium leviosa.” The lump twitched for a moment, gave a half-hearted lurch, and then settled back against the floor. Stunned, Severus collapsed into the nearest chair, shooting betrayed looks at his wand. Looking up again at Harry, he saw a worried, slightly panicked expression, which he knew was an exact mirror of his own. 

“It’s probably just a result of the bond settling,” Harry said, trying to sound reassuring, but failing miserably. “Whatever it is, it’s affecting both of us…causing our magic to go all wonky. Let’s give it a few hours and see what happens, yeah?”

Severus nodded mutely, hiding his fear with every ounce of strength he possessed, and placed his wand down on the table. Harry rose from his seat and picked up the offending mess from the floor, throwing it into the rubbish. Grabbing another kettle from the cupboard, he began again, this time without using magic.

~~~~~**~~~~~

After failing for the third time to produce a simple Sleeping Draught, Severus lost any semblance of control and threw the cauldron across the room. Sneering at the resulting noise and mess, he closed his eyes and struggled to take a calming breath. The panic rising with each passing second as he fought for control.

Pounding footsteps on the stairs alerted him that Harry had heard the ruckus. “Severus? Are you all right?” he asked as he burst into the lab.

“I am fine,” he replied through gritted teeth, opening his eyes and looking up to see Harry’s worried expression.

Harry cast a glance around the room, his eyes lingering on the dented cauldron lying against the wall and the sprays of failed potion dripping onto the floor. “Did the potion not turn out?”

“No,” Severus answered, trying and failing to find his equilibrium. “Damn it!” he exclaimed. “This is useless!”

“Severus, calm down,” Harry said soothingly, closing in and pulling him into an embrace. “Do you want to call Healer Applewhite? Perhaps he can tell us what is going on.”

“There’s nothing he will be able to do,” Severus said as the panic quickly evaporated and mutated into something worse – acceptance. “The bond has settled and this is the result. My magic has all but deserted me.”

“I don’t believe that’s true,” Harry said, tightening his arms around Severus. “And even if that is the case, which it isn’t, it won’t make any difference to me.”

“It will make a difference to me, though,” Severus whispered.

Harry pulled back and kissed him. Severus fell into the kiss, feeling all of Harry’s strength and love in that simple act. When they finally parted, Harry ran a hand comfortingly through Severus’ hair, just as Severus had done to Harry innumerable times when he was sick. 

“Let’s go back upstairs and rest, okay? We’ll give it one more day and, if nothing has changed, we’ll contact the Healer.”

Severus nodded, leaning on Harry and allowing him to lead him up the stairs and toward the bedroom. Before they could reach their haven, however, the chime on the door rang.

“Dobby, could you get that?” Harry called out. A moment later the house-elf popped into the room, blocking their path.

“Mister Harry Potter, sir, it is being Miss Luna at the door,” Dobby said, turning large, concerned eyes upon the two men.

“What could Luna possibly want?” Harry muttered. “Do you want me to send her away?” he asked, looking to Severus.

Severus was really in no mood for guests, but he was curious. Shaking his head, he said, “No, it’s all right. Let’s see what brings Miss Lovegood all the way out here. At the very least, I’m sure it will be entertaining.”

Harry smiled brightly and told Dobby to show her to the sitting room. Harry led Severus over to the settee and sat down next to him, clasping his hand comfortingly.

Luna Lovegood floated into the room, her odd and mismatched, homemade jewelry clinking and clattering as she moved. “Hello Harry…Professor,” she said in her normal, dreamy tone. 

“Hi Luna,” Harry replied, smiling fondly. “What’s going on?”

“Oh…I just woke up this morning and felt like I needed to be here,” she said airily, her gaze flitting about the room. 

“I see,” Harry said indulgently. “Was there something you wanted to talk to us about?”

“Not at first,” she said, suddenly turning her protuberant gaze to them. “But now that I’m here, I can see that I’m needed.”

“Pardon?” Harry asked warily, shrinking back a bit under the oddly pointed gaze.

“Harry, Harry, Harry,” she said, smiling as she wandered over and kneeled on the floor in front of them. Reaching out her hand to cover theirs, she said, “I have the answer to all your problems.”


	18. Chapter Eighteen

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


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To Heal a Soul

 

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To Heal a Soul

 

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A/N: Sorry for the delay, folks. Here it is! Thanks to rdwind and to all my wonderful, patient readers!

**  
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Chapter Eighteen

"Harry, Harry, Harry," Lovegood said, smiling as she wandered over and kneeled on the floor in front of them. Reaching out her hand to cover theirs, she said, "I have the answer to all your problems."

Severus and Harry exchanged a very confused look before turning back to face the woman sitting in front of them. "Our problems?" Harry asked, confusion and amusement battling for dominance on his face. "What problems are you talking about, Luna?"

Smiling serenely, she answered, "Why, it’s obvious, isn’t it?" When neither man spoke up to agree with her, she shook her head, a slightly exasperated expression coming over her face. "It’s resonating so loudly, it’s almost deafening. Your auras are completely discordant."

Severus shook his head, hoping that the movement would make some of what Lovegood said make sense. He repeated the words silently to himself, still completely at a loss. Looking over at Harry, he saw that Harry also appeared perplexed. "Er, pardon?" Harry asked.

Lovegood sighed and began speaking in an almost patronizing tone. "Your auras are out of harmony. They’re horribly tainted right now. I’m assuming it has something to do with your bond," she said. She squinted at them, looking for all intents and purposes like she was examining an interesting discovery under a magnifying glass. "You’re both having some difficulties with your magic, too," she said, straightening up and nodding to herself.

"How do you know this?" Severus asked, leaning forward.

"It’s desperately apparent, Professor," she answered. "How could I not know it? It’s all over you, after all."

"And you have the answer to all of this, then?" Harry asked.

"Yes," she said simply, sitting back and smiling again. 

"And that answer is?" Harry prompted.

"We just have to realign your auras so that they are clear of taint and get them back into harmony."

"Oh, is that all," Severus sneered, becoming quickly exasperated with the idiotic, nonsensical conversation.

"I should probably speak to your bond first, of course," she said introspectively.

"What?" Harry asked, confusion finally winning out and covering his face. "You’re going to speak to the bond? How can you speak to a bond?"

"It’s not all that difficult, Harry," she said, turning her protuberant, clear eyes on him. "After all, a bond is a living, magical essence. I’ll need to determine what it’s intent and desires are before I help you to stabilize and balance it."

Harry turned a confused, yet hopeful expression to Severus. "What do you think?" he asked.

"I think Miss Lovegood has been imbibing far too much Befuddlement Draught," Severus answered incredulously. "You can’t possibly believe all of this ridiculousness."

"I don’t think it’s ridiculous, Severus," Harry admonished severely. "After all, she knew about your Dark Mark being gone."

Severus bowed his head, easily giving in to Harry’s chastisement. Turning back to the odd woman, he said, "How is it, Miss Lovegood, that you can see our auras and speak to bonds?"

"Oh, I’ve always been able to do that," she said. "It can be a bit overwhelming at times, but you know what they say… ‘Don’t ask Piffledingers questions unless you have a pocketful of crinkleberries’."

Severus was more confused than ever, but decided the best course of action was to simply stop questioning. It seemed that the conversation only became more surreal the longer it continued. Hoping that he wasn’t making a colossal error in judgment, he decided to just go along with the situation, but stayed ready to call Dobby to summon Healer Applewhite, just in case.

"Now, just sit still for a moment while I speak to the bond."

Severus forced himself to remain sitting on the settee, glad for the comfort of Harry’s hand. Loath as he was to follow along with what was sure to be a fool’s errand, he trusted Harry’s judgment. And there was a small, niggling voice in his head reminding him that she did know about the Dark Mark. 

She stared at them, making Severus quite uncomfortable with her odd, wide eyes for a few minutes, and then she sat back and nodded to herself, blinking owlishly. "This is a very interesting story," she said. 

Harry looked at her expectantly, waiting for her to continue. When she just stared back at them, he sighed and said, "And?"

"Oh, would you like me to explain what the bond said?" she asked, as if genuinely surprised.

"Yes, please," Harry answered.

"All right, then. It’s a very powerful bond…one of the strongest I’ve ever seen. It wasn’t satisfied with its original purpose, so it was using Harry’s power," she said, gesturing to him, "to try and adjust to a more fitting state."

"How is that possible?" Harry asked, looking at Severus with a gobsmacked expression.

"Well," she said dreamily, "it all starts with the caster’s intent. Your true intent was not to bind Severus into servitude, even though that was what the original spell called for. Your magic, which was actually the Professor’s originally, if I understand correctly, was helping it along. You were obviously desiring more equality with him and the bond was slowly working its way towards that."

"This is complete and utter nonsense," Severus growled. "The bond was already forcing us into roles and now that it has been consummated, we’re locked this way. My power…" Severus faltered, "my power has been taken away as a result. It is the price I must pay and I would gladly do it a thousand times over for the same end."

"Have you examined your magical core?" she asked, turning her bright gaze to Severus. "I think you’ll be surprised at what you find."

"All the diagnostic tests I have run show that my power has been weakened almost to the point of nonexistence," Severus answered shortly, growing annoyed with the continued farce.

"I don’t mean with a spell, Professor. You must look inside yourself and see your magical core as it really is," she said calmly.

"Look inside myself?" he asked snidely. "And I suppose it is just that simple."

"Of course," she said. "I believe you’ll find it to be similar to Occlumency, which I have been told is something at which you are quite adept. I can help guide you, if you wish."

Severus was about to snort derisively, but caught sight of Harry’s hopeful gaze. Sighing heavily, he resigned himself to having to continue on with this annoying charade. He was already longing for the peace and solitude of their bedroom and the happy oblivion of sleep, but it seemed he would have to wait to reach that escape.

"Fine," he said through gritted teeth, working hard to control his ire. "What will you have me do?"

"Close your eyes," she said, moving forward and clasping his hands in hers. "Clear your mind and concentrate on the sensation of your magic. Focus until the only thing you can feel is that pulse."

"I cannot feel my magic," Severus said morosely, but he nevertheless closed his eyes and cleared his mind with practiced ease.

"I can help you with that, Severus. Your magic is not gone, it is simply being blocked and redirected," she said. 

Severus was about to say something scathing when he suddenly saw a bright pulse of light behind his eyelids. Gasping in surprise, he focused on the light and found that a dim, yet pulsing strand led away from it. "Is that it?" he asked breathlessly.

"Yes," Luna said, her voice strained in effort. "Follow it, Severus."

Severus concentrated on the strand of light and followed it, seeing it in his mind’s eye. It led to a shimmering ball, which Severus knew should have been much brighter. "Is that my magical core?"

"That is it," Luna answered. "Now, see how it is clouded?"

"Yes, I can see it," Severus said, his excitement building. "It looks as if there is a barrier around it."

"That barrier is keeping you from accessing your power," she explained. "Travel around to the other side, now."

Severus did as he was asked and saw that there was a brighter strand of light leading away from the ball. It shimmered and glowed in bright, beautiful colors and Severus sighed at the sight. "Where does it go?"

"It leads directly to Harry. The bond is siphoning off your power to give to Harry in preparation."

"In preparation of what?" Severus asked, unable to tear his eyes from the shifting colors.

"It’s readying for Harry to correct what has been done in error," she said and Severus could feel her presence slowly easing from his mind. He sighed sadly, not wanting to leave the pulsing, shimmering colors, but knowing that it was time.

Opening his eyes, he blinked a few times, his eyes watering from the light in the room. Looking over at Harry, Severus saw that he wore an expression of wonder mixed with concern. "Are you all right?" he asked Severus, brushing the hair from his forehead.

"I am fine," Severus replied, leaning into the touch. Turning back to Lovegood, he asked, "What do we have to do?"


	19. Chapter Nineteen

  
Author's notes: Severus once again finds himslef forced into being at the beck and call of the Boy Who Lived... but Harry won't be the Boy Who Lived for much longer. **NOT A DEATHFIC**  


* * *

To Heal a Soul

 

****

To Heal a Soul

__

A/N: Thanks to rdwind for loving me even when I don’t take her suggestions! Thanks to all my readers for the wonderful support and reviews!

****

Chapter Nineteen

Severus felt ridiculous. His only comfort was that there was no one to witness this utter and complete humiliation. Well, other than Harry, Dobby and the ubiquitous Miss Lovegood, that is. Fortunately, he knew that Harry would never tell anyone about this, as he was similarly humiliated. Dobby had already been sworn to secrecy on threat of being banished from service to his Harry Potter. And, best of all, even if Miss Lovegood ran down the street singing about the events that were taking place, well, no one ever believed her, anyway.

Rather than concentrating on his extreme nakedness, he decided to focus on Harry. Harry, who was equally as naked and sporting a rather fetching blush. Of course, in the gathering steam, it was difficult to maintain his focus and ignore his own mortification. Having been witness to as well as having performed many different rites throughout his life, Severus understood the importance of purification, but he was hard won to understand why he and Harry had to be purified under Lovegood’s watchful gaze.

Meeting Harry’s eye, he raised one eyebrow, conveying in that one small movement his displeasure and incredulity in the current events. Harry sent him back an imploring look that almost covered up the embarrassment that had been running rampant over his features. Sighing heavily, Severus closed his eyes and concentrated on the thick, fragrant steam that was drawing the toxins and impurities from their bodies.

"The purification has been completed," Lovegood said in a dreamy, singsong voice.

"Can we put on our dressing gowns, then?" Harry asked, already looking longingly at the robe hanging on the door.

Lovegood turned a confused expression toward him, cocking her head to the side. "If you’d like to, I don’t see why not," she said. "Are you cold?"

"No, not so much cold," Harry answered, handing Severus his dressing gown before donning his own.

"Then why would you want to put on your robes?" she asked, still staring intently at him.

"Er, well," he stammered, his face reddening again, "it’s just that it’s a bit uncomfortable to be sitting starkers in front of people, Luna."

"Really?" she asked, looking shocked. "Why? You are both very attractive…I see no reason why you would be ashamed." 

"I’m not ashamed," Harry said defensively. "But that doesn’t mean I enjoy showing my bits to all and sundry, either." Lovegood looked around the room, as if expecting to see a crowd of people there. 

"For the love of Merlin," Severus interjected, not wanting to hear anymore of the exasperating conversation. "Can’t we just move on to the next step? I, for one, would very much like to conclude our dealings here and hopefully return to some state of normality in this lifetime."

Harry looked somewhat abashed, but Lovegood just blinked her round eyes at him for a moment before turning and taking several crystals from her quilted handbag. Sitting down on the floor, Lovegood spread the crystals out in front of her, arranging them in a fashion that must have made some sense to her. Looking up, she motioned for the two men to join her on the floor.

Easing himself down, Severus folded his legs beneath him and tried to ignore the bite of the cold floor against his knees. He wondered for a moment if she had planned all of this, or if she just wandered around with crystals and such in her handbag. As Harry sat, Lovegood rearranged the crystals again, placing three each in front of the both of them, and four in front of herself. 

Dobby brought each of them a cup of tea, made to Lovegood’s specifications. Sniffing at the brew, Severus detected a whiff of the sage-like Salvia Divinorum, which he knew to have hallucinogenic properties. He had expected something along those lines, since hallucinogens were often used in rituals involving the need to search inside one’s self. He took a deep breath and drank deeply from the cup, forcing himself to maintain his belief in the bizarre woman.

Almost immediately, he felt the herb take effect, dampening his perceptions and drawing his focus inward. Looking down, Severus examined the crystals lying before him, fascinated by the way the candlelight caught and shimmered against the many facets. He became so absorbed in the glittering, colorful sparks of light that he jumped when Lovegood began speaking.

"These crystals will act as foci as we work to redirect the power flow from Severus back to his core," she said mistily. "Once that is accomplished, I will aid the bond in it’s transition into it’s desired form. This will require Harry to focus all of his power and intent, to visualize the bond settling in it’s rightful state. Do you understand?"

Severus concentrated on her words, nodding as their meaning slowly sank into his mind. He felt hazy and thick and he found it hard to grasp his thoughts as they ran through his head. It seemed as though every word Lovegood spoke echoed around the room, ringing like choir bells. Even so, each word was clear and concise and understood. 

"Close your eyes," she said, and Severus felt his eyes do so automatically. He could feel Lovegood’s calm presence enter his consciousness and saw the remembered flash of light behind his eyelids. "Follow the strand, Severus," Lovegood urged.

Severus once again found his way to the dimly pulsing ball of light at the center of his magic. He suddenly felt Harry’s presence enter his core, his magic flashing brightly as it collided with the barrier blocking his magic. He gasped as he felt the conflicting forces fill his body. Acting intuitively, Severus reached out his hand and grasped the crystals in front of him, at once feeling the anchoring power settle over him.

In his mind’s eye, he saw the first fragments of the barrier blocking his magic begin to break away. At once, he felt his power break free and flood his body, like an electric current buzzing through all of his nerve endings. Behind his eyelids, he saw a blinding, pulsating light, making him gasp. 

"Keep your eyes closed and focus," Lovegood said forcefully. Severus struggled to do just that, his eyes tearing as he squeezed his eyes tightly shut. "Direct your magic to the bond…can you see it?" she asked. Severus searched through the pulsing beams of light until he saw a glowing green band flowing toward Harry.

"Yes," he said, pushing his magic toward the band.

"Harry," she called, her voice sounding both tense and weary, "the bond is still under your control. Focus your intent…your will on the bond. Use Severus’ power, as well…" she trailed off.

Severus could feel his newly accessible power being drawn down the band toward Harry as he tried to bend the bond to his will.

"How…?" Harry asked, his voice strained in exertion.

"Concentrate on your balance," Luna replied in a breathless whisper.

With one more blinding flash of light, Severus watched in awe as the glowing green band flared into a brilliant blue. He felt an enormous backlash of power and was thrown physically back from his seated position on the floor. Still clutching the crystals tightly in his hand, he took a few ragged breaths and slowly opened his eyes.

Looking around the room, he saw that Harry and Lovegood had also been thrown back, and were both now lying in disjointed heaps on the floor. Rushing over to Harry, he was relieved to find him apparently unharmed, though barely conscious. Lovegood was knocked out completely, but a quick diagnostic showed that she was merely suffering from magical exhaustion.

With Dobby’s help, Severus managed to get Lovegood settled on the settee and Harry into the bed. Collapsing wearily onto the bed beside Harry, Severus gave Dobby instructions to watch over all of them and summon Healer Applewhite if necessary before giving in to his own exhaustion and falling asleep.

~~~~~**~~~~~

Several hours later, Severus woke to find startlingly clear, protuberant blue eyes staring at him, mere inches from his face. Jumping back in alarm, he bumped into Harry, startling him awake as well.

"Are you feeling quite well?" Lovegood asked airily, completely unconcerned at the alarm she had just caused. Severus and Harry stared at each other for a moment, each trying to calm his racing heart and startled breaths.

"Other than some magical exhaustion," Severus finally said once he had regained his equilibrium, "I believe we are both fine. And you, Miss Lovegood?"

"Oh, I’m fine," she said, peering at them intently. She smiled brightly after a moment and sat back. "And your auras are simply beautiful," she exclaimed, wide-eyed.

Harry turned and looked at Severus hopefully. "Your magic?" he asked.

"It feels as though it has been set to rights," Severus replied with a small smile. Turning back to Lovegood he asked, "And our bond?"

Lovegood closed her eyes, her face becoming quite serene. Her smile returned as she opened her eyes and said, "It is in perfect balance, at last, and very happy."

Severus was about to ask further as to the state of the bond when he saw Harry examining his inner wrist. There, just above his hand, was a Mark. Gasping in surprise, Severus reached out and pulled his arm up to his face to inspect it. His heart hammered as he saw a phoenix, it’s wing’s outstretched, and a serpent, coiled about it’s feet. 

"What is this?" Severus asked in a hushed whisper.

"That is your Mark, Severus," Lovegood said dreamily. "You belong to each other; now all is as it should be."

Without any further fanfare, Lovegood rose from the bed and drifted from the room, leaving the two men in stunned silence.


	20. Chapter Twenty

****

To Heal a Soul

_A/N: This is it, folks…the last chapter. I want to thank you all for sticking with me on this one! It’s been a blast and I’ve loved every minute! Thanks to everyone for the fabulous reviews! You all made it worthwhile! Thanks to rdwind for all the help and guidance and support! And now…_

**Chapter Twenty**

Severus stared at the mark now adorning Harry’s inner wrist, a feeling of dread slowly creeping through him. “Oh, gods, Harry,” he gasped, unable to tear his eyes away, “I’m so sorry.” Harry yanked his arm from Severus’ grasp, pulling a sob from Severus’ throat at the same time. “I never meant…I didn’t know…I never would have gone through with this farce if I had known this would happen.”

“Severus, look at me,” Harry implored in a hushed voice. Severus shook his head, barely containing his remorse and self-disgust at what he had caused. “Severus,” Harry demanded strongly, finally causing Severus’ head to rise and their eyes to meet. “I’m not sorry.”

“What?” Severus asked, not understanding how Harry could stomach the sight of him after what had happened. 

“I’m not sorry that this happened,” he said, reaching out and caressing Severus’ cheek. “I love you, Severus. Now, I belong to you just as much as you belong to me. This was supposed to happen, can’t you feel that?”

Severus shook his head in denial again. Harry was too good…too pure to be forced to wear such an abomination. His heart throbbed painfully at the wrong he had unknowingly done.

Harry reached out and took hold of Severus’ right arm, turning it to show the lightning bolt and snake. Severus watched as he lovingly ran a finger over his mark before leaning down and placing a kiss there. A pleasant shiver ran through Severus’ body at the contact.

Harry pulled Severus’ arm until he could place his hand on his chest, echoing the movement and placing his own hand over Severus’ heart. “Can you feel that?” he asked, meeting and holding Severus’ gaze intensely. “We belong to each other, just like Luna said. These marks are just an outward sign of our love. Close your eyes.”

Severus did so and immediately saw the glowing blue strand that connected the two of them together. He gasped aloud at the beauty of it, suddenly understanding everything that Harry had been trying to say. “You’re mine,” he whispered.

“Yes,” Harry answered breathlessly. “And you are mine.” 

Before Severus could open his eyes, Harry had moved closer and crashed their lips together, toppling Severus over onto his back on the bed. Groaning, Severus grabbed at Harry, pulling him impossibly closer, feeling an overwhelming need to have as much contact as possible with him.

They struggled briefly for a moment, pulling and tearing at the dressing gowns as their lips, teeth, and tongues clashed and danced together. Finally freeing themselves from the confining material, Severus’ moan of appreciation was echoed by Harry as they began sliding their bodies against each other. Severus wrapped his legs around Harry’s waist, losing himself in the pleasure of feeling Harry’s erection press against his. 

Harry grabbed Severus’ shoulders and rolled them quickly, pulling Severus on top and arching up against him, drawing another moan from Severus. Meeting his eyes questioningly, Severus paused, waiting for Harry to explain what it was he wanted.

“I want you to make love to me, Severus,” he said, his eyes burning with lust and need. “Claim me…make me yours. You marked me, now take what’s yours.”

Severus gasped in shock, feeling completely undeserving of all that he’d been given. To see this amazing, beautiful, powerful creature lying beneath him, willingly giving him everything…Severus was completely overcome. Bending low, he took Harry’s lips in a slow, sensual kiss, trying to pour all of his feelings, appreciation, and desire into the act. 

Slowly, he moved down Harry’s body, worshipping every inch of skin with his hands, lips, and tongue. He was exultant as Harry moaned and arched into him, accepting every kiss and touch responsively. Severus was too filled with love and overwhelming emotion to draw his actions out for very long, and he reached for the bedside table and the container of lube they kept there. 

Harry lifted his hips and wrapped his legs around Severus’ waist, opening and displaying himself without a hint of nervousness or restraint. Severus ran his hands up Harry’s thighs, moving around to knead and rub his arse cheeks appreciatively. Running a lubed finger between, Severus breached Harry’s body and began preparing him. Harry began pushing back against Severus’ fingers and he quickly added another and then another as he watched Harry come undone beneath him.

Not able to hold himself back any longer, he passed a slick hand along his hardened length and then firmly pressed it against Harry’s entrance. Pushing in slowly and steadily, he struggled to remain in control as he was welcomed into the hot, tight body. When he was completely sheathed, he paused and looked down at Harry. His eyes were screwed shut as he became acclimated to the intense _pleasurepain_ of Severus’ intrusion. He watched as one bead of sweat rolled from Harry’s forehead and fell to the sheet below. 

Opening his brilliant green eyes, he looked up into Severus’ face and smiled before shifting his hips upward, pulling moans from both their mouths. Severus began rocking, gently at first, still not quite believing that all of this was real. The sensation of Harry’s body gripping him as he plunged repeatedly in and out was exquisite torture. He reveled in the feel of Harry’s hips snapping against him, attempting to pull him even further into his body. 

Severus looked down at the juncture where their bodies joined, watching as his length disappeared into Harry’s body. “Oh, gods,” he murmured, feeling complete and perfect for the first time in his life. 

One of Harry’s hands was fisted tightly in the sheets and the other drifted up, wrapping around his leaking erection and pumping in time with Severus’ thrusts. “Sev’rus,” Harry moaned loudly, pearly jets spurting from his cock and bathing his chest and stomach. 

The sight of Harry’s release sliding down his body was too much for Severus. Growling deeply in his throat, he lifted Harry’s legs onto his shoulders, bending him almost in half, and started pounding into him with abandon. Harry was moaning and thrashing beneath him from the overstimulation, but was urging him on nonetheless. With another growl, Severus snapped his hips forward one last time, shooting his release deep within Harry. 

Collapsing heavily against Harry, Severus heaved several ragged breaths, feeling as though he’d never regain his equilibrium. He felt Harry’s arms snake around him in a warm embrace and melted into it. He could feel Harry’s heart thumping wildly beneath him, and knew that Harry could feel the same from him. 

Finally, blissfully, he pulled back and met Harry’s gaze. Smiling, he reached for his wand and cast a Cleansing Charm. Happiness thrummed through his body at the ease with which the spell was performed. “We’re really going to be all right, now, aren’t we?” he said, resting his forehead against Harry’s.

“Yes,” Harry answered. “As long as we’re together, everything will be perfect.”

~~~~~**~~~~~

**_Excerpt from the_ Daily Prophet __, November 16, 2002.**

The wizarding world rejoiced today as Harry Potter joined in a matrimonial bond with Severus Snape. The celebration was a private affair attended only by close family and friends. 

Harry Potter, widely known as The Boy Who Lived, The Chosen One, and The Man Who Triumphed over He Who Must Not Be Named had fallen from the public eye after his amazing defeat of You Know Who and only recently resurfaced as the brilliant new up and comer in the Design Department of Nimbus Brooms. For more information on Mr. Potter’s fast rise in the Nimbus Corporation, turn to page three.

Severus Snape, ex-Death Eater turned spy during the War, has been mostly recently recognized for his groundbreaking research into previously terminal diseases. Along with his partners, Aloysius Applewhite and Luna Longbottom (nee Lovegood), Mr. Snape has made great strides into integrating bonding and the relatively new field of Aurology, or the study of auras and their effect on health. Mr. Snape’s latest article will be appearing in the next issue of Potion Masters Monthly. For additional information on Mr. Snape’s renowned work with potions and healing, turn to page six.

When asked what was next for the happy couple, Mr. Potter had only this to say, “We plan on enjoying the exciting adventure of life together.”

**_The end._ **

 

***BETA NOTE***

I am glad you have taken this journey with Shannon. Her writing has progressed to the point in the last chapter, I could find nothing to criticize or suggest. It has been an honor to work with her over the past couple of months. Congratulate her everyone, she has made great strides in this fandom, and I am honored to have worked with her.

\---RD


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